365 days without booze... join me?

[TrevorHill]

Blib said:

I'm sorry to hear of your condition. Congratulations on quitting.

One word of caution. Do not close the door on other forms of support. You are very early on in your journey. You may need other strategies to help you along as time passes.

I have not closed the door on other forms of support. I know that we will need help as this progresses. I've moved back 'home' after spending 25 years in Southern Ireland.

I spent six weeks in hospital during the summer. It was eye opening in many ways. I got to see people in different stages of this condition. I have always said that I will choose my own exit. My solicitor and friend says that there will become a point where I won't know or remember. One of the friends I made during my time there has had an alarming decline over the past couple of months.

I met a Kerry man while there. Kerry people are a different breed but we had a love of Gaelic football and had some great chats. We were able to discuss in minute detail a game of football that he played in 1990, I could even remember a late substitution of one of the all time Kerry greats whose knee was heavily bandaged, yet neither of us could remember what we had ordered for dinner.

To put things into perspective, I have to go to Dublin on Thursday for a funeral of a young neighbour. A beautiful young woman who died yesterday from cancer. I watched her growing up from a young girl, through school and university. She was kind, she used to walk our dog when I was recovering from surgery. She had that inner beauty and generosity of spirit that is becoming rarer in this modern world. She got engaged just before Christmas. She was elated. We were making plans for a wedding that we all knew she would never see. I would have given my life for hers, gladly.

Thank you for the kind words. I was never a drinker and even when I was it never sat comfortably with me. in my younger days I was the driver, the one in control. I decided when we as a group of lads at the local disco went home. I lost that control with alcohol.

[TrevorHill]

We lost a friend during the week. Cancer. Only 28. A truly beautiful young woman. She leaves behind a grieving family and her fiancé, a wonderful young man. They just completed each other.
The funeral was on Friday. A celebration of life not fully lived. A beautiful church service. We did the grave thing and then back to a local hotel. Great stories, a few tears, a lot of hugs. I had a glass of coke and copious amounts of tea.

Yesterday was the second day that I thought about having a drink, it was though. I was tetchy. Probably not a great person to be around. An early night and a full night sleep has helped.

How do other people cope in similar circumstances?

[swanseaboydan]

You have to fast forward to what tomorrow morning will be like whenever you fancy a drink, the hangover , the anxiety, etc.
That’s what does it for me .

[Mirinjawbro]

Is 1 or 2 possible ?

[Blib]

Mirinjawbro said:

Is 1 or 2 possible ?

The short answer to that question is 'Try it and see'.

However, if you are presently alcohol dependent, then the odds are stacked heavily against being able to keep consumption down to a couple of drinks for any length of time.

Maybe the answer in your personal situation lies in the question 'Why am I asking whether 1 or 2 is possible'?.

[Mirinjawbro]

Sorry this was for the people above. Im not and hope to never be dependant just wondering mindsets

[Blib]

Mirinjawbro said:

Sorry this was for the people above. Im not and hope to never be dependant just wondering mindsets

Newvertheless, it's a good question for the thread.

[carinaman]

I last had a drink on 26 Oct. 2025. A pint of Guinness in a pub. I think I've eaten some Baileys flavoured Ice Cream since then.

I had a difficult week and had a difficult day yesterday. It was tempting to buy some drink on the way home.

I heard the BBC Radio 4 programme the week before last or them putting warning labels on alcoholic drinks like the tobacco products labeling in Eire.

I've got The Archers on, Brian Aldridge has just bought a bottle of Scotch.

[Grumbler]

Hi. New poster to thread. I’m was thoroughly sick of drinking. Too much, too regularly. Mainly rooted in boredom. For years I’ve been a ‘cheeky mid-week bottle of wine’ bloke, followed by a bottle and cocktails/spirits both weekend nights. Maybe Sunday too if Monday is easy looking.
Over Christmas I noticed I was buying two bottles on a night, ‘so I wouldn’t run out’
Anyway- Dry January. I’m going well so far. I don’t fancy alcohol per se. But god, I miss red wine. The house is full of booze, but it’s red-wine I crave.
It’s always the 6-9 slot I struggle with. If I can get through that then the prospect of a hangover free morning helps hugely. Plus the genuine sense of relief when I wake up for a piss, that I feel okay.
I’m exercising again, so I’ve lost 7lb so far. Mainly resetting to normal. But I hope to lose another few pounds before February.
I wasn’t aware it was a five weekend month. Would it be wrong to book a table for Sunday 1st Feb and get stuck back in? I know… I’m only letting myself down.
Keep it up everyone. We’re over hump day!

[swanseaboydan]

Have a go a doing 3 months off - you won’t believe the change in yourself then. 1 month off is just a taster !

[Grumbler]

But the boredom!
I’ll definitely be cutting it back ‘school nights’. I’ll be glad to reset, to get tipsy off a glass again, and to prove to myself I can do it.

[TrevorHill]

swanseaboydan said:

You have to fast forward to what tomorrow morning will be like whenever you fancy a drink, the hangover , the anxiety, etc.
That s what does it for me .

Exactly this. I went to bed with a cup of tea and two digestives. A friend texted me around 10.30 and I didn’t see it until 6am.
Over the last four years alcohol was my go to for everything. I didn’t drink in my younger days and only started in my 50s. It’s just about breaking the habit.

Mirinjawbro said:

Is 1 or 2 possible ?

One drink is one too many and a thousand isn’t enough.

I was sitting in a hotel surrounded by people drinking and I didn’t even think about having a drink. I had a hundred miles drive ahead of me anyway but we were telling stories about the young woman who had passed away, there was laughter, there were tears and I had copious amounts of tea.
When I got home and settled and left with my own thoughts I thought about having a drink. I’m disappointed in that. But I didn’t have one and that’s all that matters for now.

[Blib]

TrevorHill said:

When I got home and settled and left with my own thoughts I thought about having a drink. I m disappointed in that. But I didn t have one and that s all that matters for now.

Please don't be hard on yourself and your response to such a difficult day.

You have no control over those types of thoughts. Indeed, they are to be expected. You've been conditioned to hit the bottle in times of discomfort. So, thinking about doing so is par for the course, during the early stages of abstinence

[Wills2]

Grumbler said:

But the boredom!
I ll definitely be cutting it back school nights . I ll be glad to reset, to get tipsy off a glass again, and to prove to myself I can do it.

Honestly if you give it time you'll realise that's just your inner chimp telling you it's boring rather than it being so, life is best enjoyed sober, it really is.

[TrevorHill]

Blib said:

TrevorHill said:

When I got home and settled and left with my own thoughts I thought about having a drink. I m disappointed in that. But I didn t have one and that s all that matters for now.

Please don't be hard on yourself and your response to such a difficult day.

You have no control over those types of thoughts. Indeed, they are to be expected. You've been conditioned to hit the bottle in times of discomfort. So, thinking about doing so is par for the course, during the early stages of abstinence

I’m not being too hard on myself but I am disappointed that it ever came to me relying on alcohol. I didn’t drink in my younger days, but my brother in law warned me that if I was to start later in life it would become an issue. How right he was.
It’s a loss of discipline and self control that bothers me.

[Magooagain]

TrevorHill said:

I m not being too hard on myself but I am disappointed that it ever came to me relying on alcohol. I didn t drink in my younger days, but my brother in law warned me that if I was to start later in life it would become an issue. How right he was.
It s a loss of discipline and self control that bothers me.

It’s bloody hard for those of us that still miss it I must confess.
I’ve a reason or two to get at it but I will not give in to it.
The discipline bit is the self control and it looks to me that you have that in spades like.
Good luck.

[AB]

Weirdly, if you've spent time not drinking, and think logically about it, it's a pretty pointless thing to do.

I've still not had a drink since 2024 and it was difficult on occasion the first half of the year, now I've shown myself I can do it I am actually fairly relaxed about having a drink on an occasion. Weirdly, there's been many occasions I could, but decided not to.

I never had a 'problem' with it as such, I just couldn't stop when I started which I suppose is a type of problem as I was always last man standing and feeling the worst in the morning.

[alone wolf]

23rd day of the 'dry January' meme.

Woke fatigued, eyes burning and twitching, often a trigger for bad food decisions or substances. 23 days feels a long time for a constant state of mind... NGL I could murder a MJ micro-dose or a bottle of something. No MJ in stock, might flip a coin for the latter, we will see

Edit - coin flip said 'no'

Edited by alone wolf on Friday 23 January 16:16

Edited by alone wolf on Friday 23 January 16:16

[benmc]

Unsure of why I am posting but maybe I have realized things are better in the open.

My ex-wife is/was an alcoholic and it destroyed a 20 year partnership/marriage. Well done to those who choose to fight, I watched a successful & strong person become obsessed with the next drink.

It's taken a few years but I have rebuilt my life, had fun dating in my 40s and now found a great woman, we have been seeing each other for 6 months.

I am still in contact with her family and it's sad to hear the cycle continues. They are worried for her health and wellbeing but there is nothjing they can do.

Thanks for reading this

[TrevorHill]

You are correct, there is nothing anyone can do unless the person with the problem wants to stop. That can be difficult for those closest to them but it is an unfortunate reality.