Discussion
All these flash backs it's a bit like "Breaking Bad" but fixing stuff instead.
At a push.
I guess.
Right.
I have my Bravo HLX...
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&...
...dialy driver and track day toy (ish). Now back to being all yellow as I was getting annoyed with the adverse attention driving a purposeful looking car gets when all I'm trying to do is drive to work.
New daily Alfa 156 V6 2.5 six speed with Lusso leather.
It's a good "Winter car" so naturally I bought the old girl at the start of Summer. September time I should be able to sell for a small mark up and get a cheap convertible to mark up next Summer. Woooooo-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!
My GSXR250R SP hasn't moved or been touched for a few weeks because my shed feel like it should be full of Russians hitting each other with sticks (bit of a sauna in there).
My Panda Fantasia is still waiting for me to restore. Repair to MOT standards and get moving at least.
My neighbors exhaust hasn't fallen off and it has passed another MOT so my welding can't be that bad. He's looking for a Freelander and I'm trying to talk him out of it.
My mate's Laguna headlights haven't steamed up since I took them off and filled the cracks with silicone. Good to know their parts are as well put together as their cars. It needed rear subframe bushes and as I do not have a hydraulic press I farmed it out to a local mechanic who took six hours to do it.
My brother has a butt dent on his Focus that I pulled out using a suction pad you would usually use to lift a windscreen.
That's about it.
At a push.
I guess.
Right.
I have my Bravo HLX...
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&...
...dialy driver and track day toy (ish). Now back to being all yellow as I was getting annoyed with the adverse attention driving a purposeful looking car gets when all I'm trying to do is drive to work.
New daily Alfa 156 V6 2.5 six speed with Lusso leather.
It's a good "Winter car" so naturally I bought the old girl at the start of Summer. September time I should be able to sell for a small mark up and get a cheap convertible to mark up next Summer. Woooooo-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!
My GSXR250R SP hasn't moved or been touched for a few weeks because my shed feel like it should be full of Russians hitting each other with sticks (bit of a sauna in there).
My Panda Fantasia is still waiting for me to restore. Repair to MOT standards and get moving at least.
My neighbors exhaust hasn't fallen off and it has passed another MOT so my welding can't be that bad. He's looking for a Freelander and I'm trying to talk him out of it.
My mate's Laguna headlights haven't steamed up since I took them off and filled the cracks with silicone. Good to know their parts are as well put together as their cars. It needed rear subframe bushes and as I do not have a hydraulic press I farmed it out to a local mechanic who took six hours to do it.
My brother has a butt dent on his Focus that I pulled out using a suction pad you would usually use to lift a windscreen.
That's about it.
Sorry guys. Flashback from 2014....
Bula-loo-loop. Bula-loo-loop (Waynes World for you millennials).
"Today driveway CSI I have solved a mystery that has plagued motorist for almost a hundred years.
Why do VAG mechanics charge so much?
To be able to fill the swear box.
Replacing the flexipipe on my dads Skoda Fabia was sublime and ridiculous. The wrong part was ordered as usual (internet privileges will be revoked if it happens again) so I had to make a three inch flexipipe fit a two inch exhaust. The down pipe was an absolute arse to get off and it had to stay on in the end as to unplug the Cat' sensor meant having to remove the entire undertray. Getting to the downpipe to manifold nuts was an exercise in contortion. Welding it up was straight forward; but putting back was as much of an arse as taking it off.
I imagine several passing little people have gone home to their mothers asking what does "various terms to describe VW engineering" mean and I'd like to apologise for any naughty step or groundings as a result.
My mates Micra finally has a new front cross member and needed spot welding to finish the job. Hmmmmm....
The new cross member is made from sturdy stuff and none of his drill bits would cut it, the car is made out of wafer thin steel foil that is as good as welding toffee. Ground a few millimeters from the edges and lap welded using the new metal to absorb the heat.
Jobs done".
Bula-loo-loop. Bula-loo-loop (Waynes World for you millennials).
"Today driveway CSI I have solved a mystery that has plagued motorist for almost a hundred years.
Why do VAG mechanics charge so much?
To be able to fill the swear box.
Replacing the flexipipe on my dads Skoda Fabia was sublime and ridiculous. The wrong part was ordered as usual (internet privileges will be revoked if it happens again) so I had to make a three inch flexipipe fit a two inch exhaust. The down pipe was an absolute arse to get off and it had to stay on in the end as to unplug the Cat' sensor meant having to remove the entire undertray. Getting to the downpipe to manifold nuts was an exercise in contortion. Welding it up was straight forward; but putting back was as much of an arse as taking it off.
I imagine several passing little people have gone home to their mothers asking what does "various terms to describe VW engineering" mean and I'd like to apologise for any naughty step or groundings as a result.
My mates Micra finally has a new front cross member and needed spot welding to finish the job. Hmmmmm....
The new cross member is made from sturdy stuff and none of his drill bits would cut it, the car is made out of wafer thin steel foil that is as good as welding toffee. Ground a few millimeters from the edges and lap welded using the new metal to absorb the heat.
Jobs done".
https://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&...
My current project/rescue mission.
I'll keep this thread up to date with stuff and things from this as well.
My current project/rescue mission.
I'll keep this thread up to date with stuff and things from this as well.
Right. After running my poor Fiat Bravo this track day season I fancied something quicker for next year or at least a way of making my Bravo quicker. So I did a deal with a drift MX5 for a Fiat Punto GT with a 2.0 16V Turbo engine from a Fiat Coupe'.
Even if the Punto turned out to be a pile of rust (as it did) I could transplant the engine into my Bravo hoiking the old girl from 115hp (factory figure) to 200+ bhp.
Got the Punto home, started and ran for 15 seconds, thud, thud, stop. Hmmmm... Tried to turn it over but the engine was solid.
I thought (hoped) it was the crank as oil starvation is common with these engines if they have been stood about (also I have a mate restoring a 155 P4 who I could sell the head to). Today I did the autopsy.
Crud!
Number one valve snapped into the cylinder and vandalised the chamber in the head. Parts of the cylinder head were blown back into the inlet manifold and number two and three.
So the head is not salvageable after all.
The valve head did not go all the way through the piston so the block and crank should be okay. The bores are all good. I'll probably keep the fourteen and a half valve head as a display piece but everything else I have harvested will be going on a well known auction site later.
Even if the Punto turned out to be a pile of rust (as it did) I could transplant the engine into my Bravo hoiking the old girl from 115hp (factory figure) to 200+ bhp.
Got the Punto home, started and ran for 15 seconds, thud, thud, stop. Hmmmm... Tried to turn it over but the engine was solid.
I thought (hoped) it was the crank as oil starvation is common with these engines if they have been stood about (also I have a mate restoring a 155 P4 who I could sell the head to). Today I did the autopsy.
Crud!
Number one valve snapped into the cylinder and vandalised the chamber in the head. Parts of the cylinder head were blown back into the inlet manifold and number two and three.
So the head is not salvageable after all.
The valve head did not go all the way through the piston so the block and crank should be okay. The bores are all good. I'll probably keep the fourteen and a half valve head as a display piece but everything else I have harvested will be going on a well known auction site later.
Hi guys. This time I need your help.
I recently bought a 2007 Punto. It was advertised as an Abarth when it's a boggo 77 Grande with some cheap badges and Stilo wheels. When I pointed this out I got it cheaper as the seller genuinely had no idea and she was told it was an Abarth when she bought it.
Anyway the drivers side seat has had the airbag cover knocked off...
...and as a result the airbag warning (ultimate MOT failure light) is on and can not be reset without replacing the seat.
Trouble is so far every single seat I have seen has either got the same problem or it's urine stained, torn to shreds, damp, moldy; eBay special.
Is there a way of bypassing the airbag warning long enough to get through the MOT?
It's not like my Alfa 145 where I took the dash out and covered the bulb with tape this stupid thing as it written across the screen whenever the engine is started.
I recently bought a 2007 Punto. It was advertised as an Abarth when it's a boggo 77 Grande with some cheap badges and Stilo wheels. When I pointed this out I got it cheaper as the seller genuinely had no idea and she was told it was an Abarth when she bought it.
Anyway the drivers side seat has had the airbag cover knocked off...
...and as a result the airbag warning (ultimate MOT failure light) is on and can not be reset without replacing the seat.
Trouble is so far every single seat I have seen has either got the same problem or it's urine stained, torn to shreds, damp, moldy; eBay special.
Is there a way of bypassing the airbag warning long enough to get through the MOT?
It's not like my Alfa 145 where I took the dash out and covered the bulb with tape this stupid thing as it written across the screen whenever the engine is started.
Edited by Liquid Knight on Friday 17th November 16:36
E-bmw said:
You need to find the actual connections to the bag itself (normally on a box under the seat) and connect a 2.2 ohm resistor across it and then it will reset.
Is that something you just need to connect transiently to tell the airbag controller to stop panicking, or something you need to leave in place?GreenV8S said:
Is that something you just need to connect transiently to tell the airbag controller to stop panicking, or something you need to leave in place?
I'm going to pop down to my local scrap yard, cut a plug off a seat; then solder and insulate the resistor in place. Unplug the seat, plug the resistor in and see if it works. 
Fixing the plug and cleaning the terminals didn't work it was still showing as a fault. 
The passenger side tail light cluster was all over the place when I got the car because an amp had been wired in the boot, the tail light earth was used and the plug was cooked. As well as replacing a bunch of bulbs I cleaned the plug and terminals now all the lights work. I had a look at the other end of the earth and sure enough the side curtain airbag was earthed at the same terminal. Undid the nut, cleaned the ring terminal and hey presto I no longer have an airbag fault warning and the light goes out on the dash.
The passenger side tail light cluster was all over the place when I got the car because an amp had been wired in the boot, the tail light earth was used and the plug was cooked. As well as replacing a bunch of bulbs I cleaned the plug and terminals now all the lights work. I had a look at the other end of the earth and sure enough the side curtain airbag was earthed at the same terminal. Undid the nut, cleaned the ring terminal and hey presto I no longer have an airbag fault warning and the light goes out on the dash.
GreenV8S said:
Is that something you just need to connect transiently to tell the airbag controller to stop panicking, or something you need to leave in place?
Sorry, missed the question.When the issue is identified, you need to disconnect the tiny plug from the actual bag, they are generally brightly coloured (blue or yellow on the whole) 2 pin plugs & then connect & insulate the resistor across the plug pins & leave the plug disconnected from the airbag.
E-bmw said:
Sorry, missed the question.
When the issue is identified, you need to disconnect the tiny plug from the actual bag, they are generally brightly coloured (blue or yellow on the whole) 2 pin plugs & then connect & insulate the resistor across the plug pins & leave the plug disconnected from the airbag.
The plug is green and the wires wrapped with yellow tape. When the issue is identified, you need to disconnect the tiny plug from the actual bag, they are generally brightly coloured (blue or yellow on the whole) 2 pin plugs & then connect & insulate the resistor across the plug pins & leave the plug disconnected from the airbag.
Tied the resistor across the plug.
Didn't work.
Cut the plug off and soldered a resistor across the wires.
Hasn't worked either.
I'll have another look at the tail light earth and see if I can clan it some more as that solved it temporarily.
It's an annoyance as the car was supposed to be an Abarth...
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/fiat-punto-abarth/15277...
...but turned out to be a Grande 77 with Stilo wheels (I have had to change due to being the wrong stud pattern and offset) with some cheap badges.
The poor woman was told it was an Abarth when she bought it and didn't have a clue. I was looking for a 16V donor for my Cinquecento but am now stuck with pile of GM
!Ding dong the Witch is dead.
Well sold.
Sold at a massive loss.
No my problem any more at least.
The stupid Grande Punto is gone. Sold for £300
Meh.
Next.
My £250 Built vs Bought Fiat Cinquecento Sporting.
Why so cheap?
Well she had a sticky brake issue. At first I thought it was the piston getting stuck, but it looks almost brand new. Then I thought it could be the line or knackered master cylinder.
I took the pads out and pressed the pedal to get the piston out as far as possible to inspect the sides and sure enough it was brand new but would not under any method go back.
My only resort was to crack the bleed nipple and push the piston back into the caliper allowing the fluid to flow out that way.
All of a sudden a blob of white stuff (probably grease from where the new piston had been fitted) pustulated out of the nipple like one of those whitehead popping YouTube clips. It gathered into a clump in the bleed line and the piston was slow to retract. I blew the bleed line gear of the obstruction, reassembled the brakes and they now work perfectly.
The grease floating around inside the caliper must have been acting like a one way valve and it was a fluke I cleared it.
No GM parts, no problem.
Until the next ones at least.
Well sold.
Sold at a massive loss.
No my problem any more at least.
The stupid Grande Punto is gone. Sold for £300
Meh.
Next.
My £250 Built vs Bought Fiat Cinquecento Sporting.
Why so cheap?
Well she had a sticky brake issue. At first I thought it was the piston getting stuck, but it looks almost brand new. Then I thought it could be the line or knackered master cylinder.
I took the pads out and pressed the pedal to get the piston out as far as possible to inspect the sides and sure enough it was brand new but would not under any method go back.
My only resort was to crack the bleed nipple and push the piston back into the caliper allowing the fluid to flow out that way.
All of a sudden a blob of white stuff (probably grease from where the new piston had been fitted) pustulated out of the nipple like one of those whitehead popping YouTube clips. It gathered into a clump in the bleed line and the piston was slow to retract. I blew the bleed line gear of the obstruction, reassembled the brakes and they now work perfectly.
The grease floating around inside the caliper must have been acting like a one way valve and it was a fluke I cleared it.
No GM parts, no problem.
Until the next ones at least.
Cinquecento day II
The alternator wasn't giving enough voltage to the battery...
...before taking the new looking alternator off I rounded up the usual suspects. Cleaning terminals, the earth strap and making sure the plug to back of the alternator was clean.
That didn't work so it was time to dig around in my shed for the alternator from the Guff Cinquecento.
Now like most modern cars the Cinquecento's engine and ancillaries are pre-assembled and fitted in one. So to get to the alternator adjuster and mounting bolt you need to remove the battery (and put it on charge)...
...the drivers side front wheel, inner wheel arch liner...
...support the front of the car at the rear of the front subframe so you can use the jack to lower the engine enough to remove the mount...
...you will need a 17mm for the big nut, 16mm for the bolt and 13mm for the small nut, then 16mm again to remove the alternator itself.
Someone had fitted the wrong one. This "V" belt pulley alternator is from a Panda or Cinquecento 900 not the 1108cc Sporting.
Once the Guff alternator was fitted and the car put back together...
...she's making a healthy and consistent 14.2V with the headlights, interior fan (on full) and stereo on (Classic FM).
The alternator wasn't giving enough voltage to the battery...
...before taking the new looking alternator off I rounded up the usual suspects. Cleaning terminals, the earth strap and making sure the plug to back of the alternator was clean.
That didn't work so it was time to dig around in my shed for the alternator from the Guff Cinquecento.
Now like most modern cars the Cinquecento's engine and ancillaries are pre-assembled and fitted in one. So to get to the alternator adjuster and mounting bolt you need to remove the battery (and put it on charge)...
...the drivers side front wheel, inner wheel arch liner...
...support the front of the car at the rear of the front subframe so you can use the jack to lower the engine enough to remove the mount...
...you will need a 17mm for the big nut, 16mm for the bolt and 13mm for the small nut, then 16mm again to remove the alternator itself.
Someone had fitted the wrong one. This "V" belt pulley alternator is from a Panda or Cinquecento 900 not the 1108cc Sporting.
Once the Guff alternator was fitted and the car put back together...
...she's making a healthy and consistent 14.2V with the headlights, interior fan (on full) and stereo on (Classic FM).
The last ride in my Bravo I took a great county lane with a humpback bridge that's good for fifteen to twenty feet of air depending how fast you are going.
Obviously for the record that is a silly thing to do on a public road as you can damage your vehicle, easily lose control, crash or damage the road/bridge/stuff around.
Someone in a similar car matching my description (a-hem) landed the other side of the bridge and the car was making a clunky thumpy sound the rest of the way home.
The plastic lower spring locator disc with a pin in the middle had shattered and the spring itself was only just on the car.
Just as well I didn't; I mean that driver didn't go back for another go.
Obviously for the record that is a silly thing to do on a public road as you can damage your vehicle, easily lose control, crash or damage the road/bridge/stuff around.
Someone in a similar car matching my description (a-hem) landed the other side of the bridge and the car was making a clunky thumpy sound the rest of the way home.
The plastic lower spring locator disc with a pin in the middle had shattered and the spring itself was only just on the car.
Just as well I didn't; I mean that driver didn't go back for another go.
It reminds me of this classic.
I know it's a re re re re re repost but...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCdpF2sffds
I know it's a re re re re re repost but...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCdpF2sffds
Driveway CSI and lowering my Cinquecento.
I took a before shot to see if the car would end up like my photoshopping yesterday.
Opened the box and...
Rule 2: check the part before you take anything apart.
...the springs didn't look right. Sure enough the standard springs are two centimeters wider at the base and one coil less. So instead of being -40mm these would be +80mm if they could be fitted.
So as I had the car on ramps I got horny and fitted my Maserati dual tone. Now the Womlings will be in for a shock if they pull out in front or cut me up.
I took a before shot to see if the car would end up like my photoshopping yesterday.
Opened the box and...
Rule 2: check the part before you take anything apart.
...the springs didn't look right. Sure enough the standard springs are two centimeters wider at the base and one coil less. So instead of being -40mm these would be +80mm if they could be fitted.
So as I had the car on ramps I got horny and fitted my Maserati dual tone. Now the Womlings will be in for a shock if they pull out in front or cut me up.
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