The worst book you have ever read.
Discussion
Flip Martian said:
The Woman In White by Wilkie Collins. Granted it was for my GCE syllabus, so over 35 years ago but I remember it as turgid, dull, heavy language. And I used to read adult books quite happily from the age of 8 or so.
do you read children's books now that you're an adult?easytiger123 said:
Tried reading The Celestine Prophecy once. Has to take the biscuit as the worst book I've ever tried to read but gave up on. The worst book I've ever actually read all the way through is Nostromo by Joseph Conrad. Turgid beyond belief.
We had Nostromo on our shelf, sort of swept it up from her house many years agoI never tried to read it after she told me she hated it
Compulsory book at school
She detested it and brought it here to gloat that she'd never be made to read it again
Must be some turgid crap to get that vicious a response every time I suggested she might like it better now...
.....
I have just turned to search for it on THAT shelf, I do not think it is still on this earth except as pulped paper
Not a sign of it
leglessAlex said:
Twilight, it remains the only book I've ever actually thrown away.
Read the first chunk of Twilight at some creative writing expo and just wow... What trash. A terrible affliction on any bookshelf anywhere. It opens with "This is the story of how I died", which is particularly terrible when you consider I've sat in lectures, given by authors and literary academics, and the first rule is always don't preface your story like that. Its like saying Once upon a time, but without any of the quirks. Lets say no more about Twilight and hope it goes awayI have another worst book, on par with Twilight. Perhaps its even a controversial choice. I hate, 50 Shades of Grey. When I was in college I read some of my then girlfriend's copy. Its just so poorly written. I'm not talking about plot, or characters or BDSM, just literally the prose. It strikes me as a GCSE level author writing for highschool students.
While I'm happy its brought S&M to many couples and lessened the taboo (I remember hearing about Anne Summers sales going through the roof after its release) I just can't forgive poor character development, unrealistic realism and frankly an abusive relationship masquerading as BDSM.
TL;DR : Read a handful of pages of my girlfriends 50 shades a few years ago, combined it with a few John Bishop jokes and now I've decided I'm an expert and its terrible.
While I'm happy its brought S&M to many couples and lessened the taboo (I remember hearing about Anne Summers sales going through the roof after its release) I just can't forgive poor character development, unrealistic realism and frankly an abusive relationship masquerading as BDSM.
TL;DR : Read a handful of pages of my girlfriends 50 shades a few years ago, combined it with a few John Bishop jokes and now I've decided I'm an expert and its terrible.
The Long Earth. Nothing happens. Quite possibly the most boring book in the world, I tried to read the sequel The Long Mars but nothing continued to happen and I abandoned it halfway through.
Only picked it up because of Pratchett's involvement but it seemed that the only hint he was a part of it is that some of the characters are named after Discworld residents, and that just seemed like a cheap way to get his fans onboard. Gods, it was bad
Only picked it up because of Pratchett's involvement but it seemed that the only hint he was a part of it is that some of the characters are named after Discworld residents, and that just seemed like a cheap way to get his fans onboard. Gods, it was bad
The Crack Fox said:
As you like it - Shakespeare. I really don't get the attraction of the Bard. Am I to be shot, now?
Indeed so.I give you my word to make it relatively quick and painless.
In my experience and opinion, Shakespeare is far better watched and listened to than read.
It also helps in many cases, though it's not necessary, to be reasonably well versed in Greek mythology and cognitive of the historical context of the particular play, in order to fully appreciate many of the references,
Reading the play after watching a reasonable performance is much easier.
The Qu'ran - despite being a bit of an anti-theist I find religion interesting, mainly because there seems to be no reason that makes sense to me why so many people devote so much of their time to it, so I'm always wanting to see/read/hear something that gives some justification for it.
A colleague of mine who seemingly spends most of his time banging on about how wonderful Islam is and how the Qu'ran is such a powerful and moving book, he would claim that because it's not really changed since it was written gives it extra validity, presumably over any other book that hasn't changed either. Because of various discussions he went out and bought me a copy to read, in return I bought him 'God is not great' by Christopher Hitchens.
I did approach it with a strong sense of curiosity. No I wasn't expecting to find God but perhaps they'd be something I'd not considered.
I read it all, my friend didn't bother with the one I'd bought him
In English it's quite a short book, just under 300 pages so didn't take long to read, however the style is crazy. Each chapter or surah is presented in length rather then chronological order with the longest first. Not that that really matters as the random nature of the text makes it difficult to process, at first I wasn't sure I'd be bothered but after a while I kinda got used to the random nature and with each chapter shorter than the last it's motivation at least to continue. You have endless sentences on seemingly random points each bookended with 'because God is wise/all knowing/merciful/vengeful/insert as appropriate' to help illustrate the point being made. The author lays it on very thick throughout that you must give your absolute all no matter how grim the situation is to fight and expand the tribe because if you hold back at all the the man upstairs will know and you'll not get any favours from him when your time comes. The fear of God is used massively and it's quite interesting as it was clearly quite affective (we'd not know about the book otherwise!). There's random clumsy stuff about science and the rules of engagement. If you're not a Muslim then that's fine, providing you didn't know about it, but when given the choice then you're nothing if you don't become one, when these engagements fail it's summed up with the sinister description of 'we did not destroy them, they destroyed themselves'. There're references to the Bible and heretical texts that didn't make it which I found interesting. The rules of engagement are cold (women are clearly property, not equals) but there really wasn't any beauty or messages to inspire. It's a set of commands that aren't really open to interpretation that have to be followed to get anywhere in the afterlife.
I appreciate that the bulk of what makes up Islamic doctrine is taken from the hadiths but given the volume of text in those I wasn't sufficiently interested to plough through those, but I felt that by reading this book it give me a bit of an understanding as to where that religion is coming from and why its incompatible with the modern world. It's nothing at all like the bible, I think I had expected it to be similar but it's far, far worse. As a work of fiction it's an awful rambling mess of a book, as a bit of history it's interesting to a point but it's a brutal, awkward and ultimately dangerous book.
TL;DR - it's awful, however still probably worth a read.
A colleague of mine who seemingly spends most of his time banging on about how wonderful Islam is and how the Qu'ran is such a powerful and moving book, he would claim that because it's not really changed since it was written gives it extra validity, presumably over any other book that hasn't changed either. Because of various discussions he went out and bought me a copy to read, in return I bought him 'God is not great' by Christopher Hitchens.
I did approach it with a strong sense of curiosity. No I wasn't expecting to find God but perhaps they'd be something I'd not considered.
I read it all, my friend didn't bother with the one I'd bought him
In English it's quite a short book, just under 300 pages so didn't take long to read, however the style is crazy. Each chapter or surah is presented in length rather then chronological order with the longest first. Not that that really matters as the random nature of the text makes it difficult to process, at first I wasn't sure I'd be bothered but after a while I kinda got used to the random nature and with each chapter shorter than the last it's motivation at least to continue. You have endless sentences on seemingly random points each bookended with 'because God is wise/all knowing/merciful/vengeful/insert as appropriate' to help illustrate the point being made. The author lays it on very thick throughout that you must give your absolute all no matter how grim the situation is to fight and expand the tribe because if you hold back at all the the man upstairs will know and you'll not get any favours from him when your time comes. The fear of God is used massively and it's quite interesting as it was clearly quite affective (we'd not know about the book otherwise!). There's random clumsy stuff about science and the rules of engagement. If you're not a Muslim then that's fine, providing you didn't know about it, but when given the choice then you're nothing if you don't become one, when these engagements fail it's summed up with the sinister description of 'we did not destroy them, they destroyed themselves'. There're references to the Bible and heretical texts that didn't make it which I found interesting. The rules of engagement are cold (women are clearly property, not equals) but there really wasn't any beauty or messages to inspire. It's a set of commands that aren't really open to interpretation that have to be followed to get anywhere in the afterlife.
I appreciate that the bulk of what makes up Islamic doctrine is taken from the hadiths but given the volume of text in those I wasn't sufficiently interested to plough through those, but I felt that by reading this book it give me a bit of an understanding as to where that religion is coming from and why its incompatible with the modern world. It's nothing at all like the bible, I think I had expected it to be similar but it's far, far worse. As a work of fiction it's an awful rambling mess of a book, as a bit of history it's interesting to a point but it's a brutal, awkward and ultimately dangerous book.
TL;DR - it's awful, however still probably worth a read.
qube_TA said:
in return I bought him 'God is not great' by Christopher Hitchens.
Not the right thread for it, but Peter Hitchens 'The Rage Against God' might interest you.As I am sure you are well aware, the brothers held opposing views.
(It will likely not make a convert of you either, but it's an enjoyable read, and less likely to make 'the worst' list
)Which reminds me, I must put down Russian classics and Solzhenitsyn for a bit and read 'God is not great'.
Having watched quite a few hours of his debates and talks, I expect I am quite familiar with the content already.
The Qu'ran will remain lower on the 'must read list', but for the benefit of intellectual discussions with my few Muslim friends, it's probably worth making the effort.
Goaty Bill 2 said:
Not the right thread for it, but Peter Hitchens 'The Rage Against God' might interest you.
As I am sure you are well aware, the brothers held opposing views.
(It will likely not make a convert of you either, but it's an enjoyable read, and less likely to make 'the worst' list )
Which reminds me, I must put down Russian classics and Solzhenitsyn for a bit and read 'God is not great'.
Having watched quite a few hours of his debates and talks, I expect I am quite familiar with the content already.
The Qu'ran will remain lower on the 'must read list', but for the benefit of intellectual discussions with my few Muslim friends, it's probably worth making the effort.
I enjoyed 'God is not great' very much, I always found the Hitch vastly entertaining and really miss having him around. I would LOVE to hear what he might have to say about Trump, for example.As I am sure you are well aware, the brothers held opposing views.
(It will likely not make a convert of you either, but it's an enjoyable read, and less likely to make 'the worst' list
)Which reminds me, I must put down Russian classics and Solzhenitsyn for a bit and read 'God is not great'.
Having watched quite a few hours of his debates and talks, I expect I am quite familiar with the content already.
The Qu'ran will remain lower on the 'must read list', but for the benefit of intellectual discussions with my few Muslim friends, it's probably worth making the effort.
I think it's time we lowered the tone a bit, because there are some classics in this thread so far. Check this out;
Don't Tell Mum I Work on the Rigs: (She Thinks I'm a Piano Player in a w
ehouse) by Paul Carter
Widely well reviewed by reading age 4 amazon reviewers, but check the one star reviews to get the real situation. As one person put it; one star is too many.
Don't Tell Mum I Work on the Rigs: (She Thinks I'm a Piano Player in a w
ehouse) by Paul Carter Widely well reviewed by reading age 4 amazon reviewers, but check the one star reviews to get the real situation. As one person put it; one star is too many.
otherman said:
I think it's time we lowered the tone a bit, because there are some classics in this thread so far. Check this out;
Don't Tell Mum I Work on the Rigs: (She Thinks I'm a Piano Player in a wehouse) by Paul Carter
Widely well reviewed by reading age 4 amazon reviewers, but check the one star reviews to get the real situation. As one person put it; one star is too many.
I quite enjoyed that one, won't be reading it again but a solid 3 stars.Don't Tell Mum I Work on the Rigs: (She Thinks I'm a Piano Player in a w
ehouse) by Paul Carter Widely well reviewed by reading age 4 amazon reviewers, but check the one star reviews to get the real situation. As one person put it; one star is too many.
Worst book I've ever (tried to) read: Revolution by Russell Brand
I didn't get past the middle. It's a load of communist clap trap, 30years after communism has failed in the free world. The fact that he might actually believe these ideas work is quite strange. I think he's a very funny man, a genius of comedy, but this love letter to Trotsky is dire.
Other low points of literature:
Ulysses - tried three times to finish it, failed three times. Failed twice to listen to the audio book FFS!
Downbelow Station - Hugo Prize winner 1982, I'm a BIG science fiction fan and the Hugo winners are usually amazing. 1982 not so much.
Most/many of the others mentioned on this thread I've read and enjoyed, but some are hard work. That's not to say they aren't rewarding as literature even if you don't burn through the pages sat by the pool.
Jeffrey Archer is an incredible author, but has basically got worse year on year,. The initial novels are truly great. They don't get valued because they're basic storytelling fiction, and critics don't value this, just like a SF film never wins an Oscar.
I didn't get past the middle. It's a load of communist clap trap, 30years after communism has failed in the free world. The fact that he might actually believe these ideas work is quite strange. I think he's a very funny man, a genius of comedy, but this love letter to Trotsky is dire.
Other low points of literature:
Ulysses - tried three times to finish it, failed three times. Failed twice to listen to the audio book FFS!
Downbelow Station - Hugo Prize winner 1982, I'm a BIG science fiction fan and the Hugo winners are usually amazing. 1982 not so much.
Most/many of the others mentioned on this thread I've read and enjoyed, but some are hard work. That's not to say they aren't rewarding as literature even if you don't burn through the pages sat by the pool.
Jeffrey Archer is an incredible author, but has basically got worse year on year,. The initial novels are truly great. They don't get valued because they're basic storytelling fiction, and critics don't value this, just like a SF film never wins an Oscar.
"The Great Gatsby", it may be a product of it's time in terms of language but my god it was awful.
Clive Cussler isn't so bad, enjoyable easy reading.
Andy McNab books are poor and as per other posters, Twilight, I read about 5 pages and threw it away (not my copy).
Dan Brown, I could cope with the Robert Langdon novels but the standalone Digital Fortress and Deception point were awful.
Clive Cussler isn't so bad, enjoyable easy reading.
Andy McNab books are poor and as per other posters, Twilight, I read about 5 pages and threw it away (not my copy).
Dan Brown, I could cope with the Robert Langdon novels but the standalone Digital Fortress and Deception point were awful.
Gassing Station | Books and Literature | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff