The King of PH.

Author
Discussion

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
Its high time we had a King. it seems only reasonable. Ted is after all God, and Twinners is the Pope, so we really should have a King. The king could then answer all questions on 'which luxury barge etc' by cutting the villages new born in half. or something. anyway, it'd be cool to be the king.

May i suggest that we assess and appoint our king purely on his PH value: not with litmus paper, but on his addiction to the motorised vehicle.

Heres how I think we should do it:

number of cars owned - number of years you've legally been allowed to drive for = pistonhead index

The highest positive number will therefore be the person most stoopid for cars and therefore should rightly be our leader.

Ill go first.

Ive had 22 cars, and Ive been allowed to legally drive for 16 years, giving me a PH index of 6.

now you.

XJSJohn

15,964 posts

219 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
11 cars 14 years ... PH Index of -3

What about motorbikes?

edited for bad maths
Edited by XJSJohn on Tuesday 13th February 18:50



Edited by XJSJohn on Tuesday 13th February 18:51

rich 36

13,739 posts

266 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
And what might your role be?


(nervy)


Edited by rich 36 on Tuesday 13th February 18:48

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
XJSJohn said:
11 cars 14 years ... PH Index of 3

What about motorbikes?


sorry thats -3.

no motorbikes. the king cant be a gayer.


Edited by nervous on Tuesday 13th February 18:48

Parrot of Doom

23,075 posts

234 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
I think you'd get more Queens than Kings

percy flage

1,770 posts

222 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
A better equation would be:

(number of cars owned x cubic capacity)/years legally allowed to drive.

I think.

ETA: because with nervy's formula I can't get my PH above 1. One of the perils of a life of mostly company cars.




Edited by percy flage on Tuesday 13th February 18:50

touching cloth

11,706 posts

239 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
Yay I am a zero, I always knew I was yunno.

17 cars in 17 years, rather fitting I think.

My money is on Silverback Mike

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
rich 36 said:
And what might your role be?


(nervy)


Edited by rich 36 on Tuesday 13th February 18:48


probably jester.

unless i win, in which case, all will die. obviously.

apart from you lover

_Batty_

12,268 posts

250 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
PH index = 3

5 years 8 cars

GTRene

16,499 posts

224 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
hehe lol good item...
oke here I come, I've had together with my latest car the Hartge, 117 cars owned registered on my name and driven myself, so not the girlfriend cars those were all my cars...
I've driven licenced from 18 now I'm 44 so more then 25 years..

117 cars with the car I have today

25 years drivers license

GTRene


Edited by GTRene on Tuesday 13th February 18:50

zoidberg

8,787 posts

282 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
Its high time we had a King. it seems only reasonable. Ted is after all God, and Twinners is the Pope, so we really should have a King. The king could then answer all questions on 'which luxury barge etc' by cutting the villages new born in half. or something. anyway, it'd be cool to be the king.

May i suggest that we assess and appoint our king purely on his PH value: not with litmus paper, but on his addiction to the motorised vehicle.

Heres how I think we should do it:

number of cars owned - number of years you've legally been allowed to drive for = pistonhead index

The highest positive number will therefore be the person most stoopid for cars and therefore should rightly be our leader.

Ill go first.

Ive had 22 cars, and Ive been allowed to legally drive for 16 years, giving me a PH index of 6.

now you.



8 cars - 12 years = -4

Don't mean to p1ss on your proverbial bonfire, hijack your thread, call you names, or poke you in the eye, but would a cars per year ratio be a better measure?

Me: 12/8 = 1.5
You: 16/22 = 0.72

Closest to zero is King?

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
percy flage said:
A better equation would be:

(number of cars owned x cubic capacity)/years legally allowed to drive.

I think.



gets complicated though, doesnt it? for instance, do you round up to 4 litres, or use 3996 cc?

too much room for error, in my humble O.

UncleDave

7,154 posts

231 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
PH Index:
+0.3 recurring

johnnymaestro

4,775 posts

223 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
4 cars 3 years

PH Index of 1.

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
zoidberg said:


8 cars - 12 years = -4

Don't mean to p1ss on your proverbial bonfire, hijack your thread, call you names, or poke you in the eye, but would a cars per year ratio be a better measure?

Me: 12/8 = 1.5
You: 16/22 = 0.72

Closest to zero is King?


typical ph, always with the opinions, never with the answers.

cant we just play the game my way and get on with it?

magic torch

5,781 posts

222 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all

-10

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

230 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
GTRene said:
hehe lol good item...
oke here I come, I've had together with my latest car the Hartge, 117 cars owned registered on my name and driven myself, so not the girlfriend cars those were all my cars...
I've driven licenced from 18 now I'm 44 so more then 25 years..

117 cars with the car I have today

25 years drivers license

GTRene


Edited by GTRene on Tuesday 13th February 18:50


are you in car sales? if so, i reckon thats cheating. if not, looks like we have a new king already. bow

touching cloth

11,706 posts

239 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
magic torch said:

-10



It's shit being old isn't it Oldy!

XJSJohn

15,964 posts

219 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
GTRene said:


117 cars with the car I have today

25 years drivers license

GTRene




This is gonna be tough to beat !! hehe

magic torch

5,781 posts

222 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
touching cloth said:
magic torch said:

-10



It's shit being old isn't it Oldy!


Yeah, I'd much rather be fat.