The King of PH.

Author
Discussion

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

229 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
johnnymaestro said:
What about PM or Prez?


ok, theyre in there, just above groom of the stool.

BossCerbera

8,188 posts

242 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
lowest score = groom of the stool.

If ever there was an impetus to buy more cars, it's the risk of earning that title. That's shit that is.

gorvid

22,226 posts

224 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all

I think SilverbackMike might have a chance at this you know yes

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

229 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
BossCerbera said:
nervous said:
lowest score = groom of the stool.

If ever there was an impetus to buy more cars, it's the risk of earning that title. That's shit that is.


rofl

danger mouse

3,828 posts

260 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
I think we should list the cars too as some cars are more "PH" than their swept volume might suggest, and might qualify some pretenders to the throne for a viva on their PHI score.

ie. I have had two (proper) mini's, both only 998cc, and both within 2 years of driving licencehood (I learnt in one of them!) but I'm certain they should add up to and better index than 0 or 2 (at time of purchase of the second one IYSWIM) depending on which way you do the scoring.

I'll hold fire listing all of my old bangers until there there is consensus on this. All I will say at this point is I'm sure I'm not the only one here who had owned a few in-betweeners which are far to paperbag to list in the "My Cars" section of the site.

Besides surely any true King should be able to trace his lineage back directly to Petrol Ted. confused

My scores would either be: 7-10 = -3
...or... (7*10.1)/11 = 6.42727272727272727272727272727273

...depending on method.

I prefer the second, but wonder if there should an element that is defined by your involvent on PH its self... Multipler for no. of posts or months on the boards.

Just a thought.


Edited by danger mouse on Tuesday 13th February 19:22

mackie1

8,153 posts

232 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
-5 (5 cars, 10 years driving)

Xaero

4,060 posts

214 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
5 cars, 3 years = 2 for me

nervous

Original Poster:

24,050 posts

229 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
danger mouse said:
I think we should list the cars too as some cars are more "PH" than their swept volume might suggest, and might qualify some pretenders to the throne for a viva on their PHI score.

ie. I have had to (proper) mini's, both only 998cc, and both within 2 years of driving licencehood (I learnt in one of them!) but I'm certain they should add up to and better index than 0 or 2 (at time of purchase of the second one IYSWIM) depending on which way you do the scoring.

I'll hold fire listing all of my old bangers until there there is consensus on this. All I will say at this point is I'm sure I'm not the only one here who had owned a few in-betweeners which are far to paperbag to list in the "My Cars" section of the site.

Besides surely any true King should be able to trace his lineage back directly to Petrol Ted. confused

My scores would either be: 7-10 = -3
...or... (7*10.1)/11 = 6.42727272727272727272727272727273

...depending on method.

I prefer the second, but wonder if there should an element that is defined by your involvent on PH its self... Multipler for no. of posts or months on the boards.

Just a thought.


oh come on, just play along. its just for fun. theres no need for spreadsheets.

all cars owned count. i for instance have included my mahindra marksman paperbag

gorvid

22,226 posts

224 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
mahindra marksman paperbag


...

beaker123

1,402 posts

210 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
18 cars - ten years driving...


that gives me a ph of 8.

gorvid

22,226 posts

224 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all

nervous said:



danger mouse

3,828 posts

260 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
oh come on, just play along. its just for fun. theres no need for spreadsheets.

all cars owned count. i for instance have included my mahindra marksman paperbag


I included all mine in the score too!

What I meant was we would be including more info here than could be gleaned from a quick rifle through each others' profiles.

I was including my 1275cc Meastro and my 1.4 Renault 9 Sainbury's trolley stylee liftoff oversteer special! eekhehe

Wacky Racer

38,099 posts

246 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
scratchchin...in order...

Vauxhall Victor 2.3 OHC
Ford Escort mk1 1100
Triumph Spitfire Mk 1V
Ford Capri mk 11...1600
Ford Capri mk 11...1600
Morgan plus 8
Ford Capri mk 111...3.0S
Ford Capri mk 111...1600
Ford Sierra 1600
Vauxall Astra 1300
Fiat Panda
Fiat Uno
Ford Granada Ghia
Ford Granada
Vauxhall Astra 1600
Fiat Punto
Fiat Brava
Peuguot 306
Renault Scenic Blue
Renault Scenic Red
Renault Scenic Bronze
Hyundai Coupe
Hyundai Trajet
Mercedes Coupe
Morgan Roadster
Fiat Grande Punto

So (not counting sixteen motor bikes) that's 26 - 37 years = -11........

Neil_Bolton

17,113 posts

263 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
touching cloth said:
Yay I am a zero, I always knew I was yunno.

17 cars in 17 years, rather fitting I think.

My money is on Silverback Mike


Me too

Yarrrrrrrrr.

he's ex navy btw

peterpeter

6,437 posts

256 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
Its high time we had a King. it seems only reasonable. Ted is after all God, and Twinners is the Pope, so we really should have a King. The king could then answer all questions on 'which luxury barge etc' by cutting the villages new born in half. or something. anyway, it'd be cool to be the king.

May i suggest that we assess and appoint our king purely on his PH value: not with litmus paper, but on his addiction to the motorised vehicle.

Heres how I think we should do it:

number of cars owned - number of years you've legally been allowed to drive for = pistonhead index

The highest positive number will therefore be the person most stoopid for cars and therefore should rightly be our leader.

Ill go first.

Ive had 22 cars, and Ive been allowed to legally drive for 16 years, giving me a PH index of 6.

now you.


touching cloth

11,706 posts

238 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
gorvid said:

nervous said:






Or the poor mans Jeep Wrangler. Same effect though



Please tell me you have a picture of you in it somewhere Nerv.

mybrainhurts

90,809 posts

254 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
number of cars owned - number of years you've legally been allowed to drive for = pistonhead index


Oi, that's Old Fartism, that is....

Foul.....

magic torch

5,781 posts

221 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all

What about:

the number of cars I believe I'm qualified to give an opinion on - the number of years I've owned a computer?

peterpeter

6,437 posts

256 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
Its high time we had a King. it seems only reasonable. Ted is after all God, and Twinners is the Pope, so we really should have a King. The king could then answer all questions on 'which luxury barge etc' by cutting the villages new born in half. or something. anyway, it'd be cool to be the king.

May i suggest that we assess and appoint our king purely on his PH value: not with litmus paper, but on his addiction to the motorised vehicle.

Heres how I think we should do it:

number of cars owned - number of years you've legally been allowed to drive for = pistonhead index

The highest positive number will therefore be the person most stoopid for cars and therefore should rightly be our leader.

Ill go first.

Ive had 22 cars, and Ive been allowed to legally drive for 16 years, giving me a PH index of 6.

now you.




this criteria sounds a bit weak..
I mean, what if you are really, really old ...say over 40 or something, and you have had loads of cars in the past (4 Austin Princesses, 2 lancias, a fiat 132 and some shitty rovers for example)
Doesnt mean you wont drive like Miss Daisy does it?
No, I think laptimes round bedford west circuit would be a fairer representation of the required regal qualities, or perhaps total owned horsepower, or perhaps fastest road speed on the autobahn of course.

FourWheelDrift

88,375 posts

283 months

Tuesday 13th February 2007
quotequote all
rich 36 said:
And what might your role be?

(nervy)


Somewhere in Norfolk a village is missing an idiot.