DIY Mechanics Fail Stories

DIY Mechanics Fail Stories

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Negative Creep

24,942 posts

226 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Was flogging a truly hateful Golf that I couldn't wait to be shot of. Since it was burning oil quicker than petrol I thought I best do one last job and give it an oil change. I promptly stripped the sump thread.


Also once jacked up an AX by the sill, only for the whole rusty area to break and the car come crashing back to earth

Fleckers

2,851 posts

200 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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storminnorman said:
side lights stopped functioning on the 306, so i spent a whole day ferreting around the fuses, leads, steering column switches etc. Was planning to throw in the towel and call the garage, when a few days later i struck on the genius idea of actually looking at the bulbs. guess what.
banghead
ha ha ok I should not laugh

Brake lights on my Opel Manta stopped working, I stripped the inside of the car out, rewired the car everything with my dad offering words of advice of have you checked the bulbs and fuse to wich I told him not to be so silly, a full weekends worth of stripping, rewiring and rebuilding the inside of the car and the lights still did not work, then my dad popped the fuse and said its blown

Doh at least the wiring was new......

Robb F

4,562 posts

170 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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miniman said:
Rebuilt a Holley 4 Barrel Double Pumper on my Trans Am. Never ran properly again. Sold it to a bloke who later admitted that having turned the main jets the right way up it ran beautifully.
I bought my Yamaha as a poor runner with a good amount of money off to make up for it. Rebuilt the carb (including putting the main jet up the right way) and used it for 6 months before selling it for £400 profit biggrin

(Sorrys thats not a fail, but it was relevant hehe)

littlebasher

3,767 posts

170 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Removing the steering wheel from an old VW camper, i made the simple mistake of not putting the retaining nut on loose before trying to yank it off.

After a lot of pulling and twisting it came off......right into my nose.

On the plus side, this was in a VW breakers and the owner on seeing my nice broken nose gave me the wheel for free.

otherman

2,190 posts

164 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
quotequote all
Fleckers said:
ha ha ok I should not laugh

Brake lights on my Opel Manta stopped working, I stripped the inside of the car out, rewired the car everything with my dad offering words of advice of have you checked the bulbs and fuse to wich I told him not to be so silly, a full weekends worth of stripping, rewiring and rebuilding the inside of the car and the lights still did not work, then my dad popped the fuse and said its blown

Doh at least the wiring was new......
I'm completely mystified by this. A bulb goes out so you assume its the wiring loom???

surveyor

17,768 posts

183 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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I've had a few fails right at the start. Calliper bolts normally.

Also had a good one with the lawn mower. Thing had been stored at an angle, and lots of white smoke on start-up. I professionally diagnosed that oil had seeped into the cylinders. Confidently said it'll burn off - just check the sump level now.

Few minutes it died. No hint of trying to go. Decided the spark plug was oiled up, out it came, a bit of emery paper etc.

Still no joy.

6 year old daughter than asks if it has any petrol in it. I think she may be a future pistonhead.....clap


Drive Blind

5,076 posts

176 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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not me but a mate, honestly.

We were 18-19 and within our social circle everybody owned the usual cheap fords, vauxhalls, etc.

Matey splashes out and buys an Astra GTE 16v. Tells us that with his car having fuel injection and 16 valves then it needs proper oil, castrol GTX just wont do.

Splashes out 50 quid on Mobil 1 and proceeds with the oil change.

As he's filling it back up he's all proud as punch with his new car and his posh oil - I'm thinking why has the road suddenly turned all slippy? He'd forgot to put the sump plug back in - D'oh.

Had to go to the local car factors place only a 2 min walk away - what did he come back with? Yup, Castrol GTX. I think he did his next oil change without an audience.

Rickyy

6,618 posts

218 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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My old man was showing me how to change brake pads on my 306, I watched him do one side and then he left me to do the other!

Next day..."Dad my brakes are making a funny noise, can you check them?" I was rushing and put the pads in the wrong fking way!!

BFG TERRANO

2,172 posts

147 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Threaded a sump nut thread, wrecked the sump pan.
Got an over sized bolt in It with ptfe tape and drove tongue in cheek to my local garage with 1 eye on the oil light.

Since bought a pele pump and suck oil out via the dip stick tube. Not touched a sump nut since.

japzap

89 posts

138 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Took me four and a half hours to remove a wheel bearing from the front hub of a Citroen once....that was a bit of a fail. I don't get on with French cars furious

TITWONK

530 posts

166 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Right I can not believe I'm going to put this here as I have never told anyone, even my old man who was quite interested in what went wrong!

Friend had a motocross 125 bike stolen and the police had found it but half the engine and other bits were missing! Que me striking a deal and spending fk knows how much on eBay and other places building this thing back up. It was a TM and parts were quite rare and expensive.

Things were going great, it looked like a motocross bike again and all there was left to do was fit the new piston and cylinder head, tune the carb up and bleed the front break!

I do not know why I did this next thing! It's not like I am an engine virgin and had completed many a hard task on my cars.

Some how I had forgot to fit the bearing in the piston and just pinned the 50 quid piston straight to the con rod! I know I know very fking stupid!

So I slide the cylinder head on get the carb on and get the old man to push me around the bottom field until, yes! She fired in to life! Then a massive clicking sound! Then it completely seized!

I knew straight away what was wrong but I was to embarrassed to say to anyone! The old man put it down to the people who stolen it dropping a bolt in to the bottom end when they stripped it. I just agreed and almost cried inside frown

crofty1984

15,830 posts

203 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Boat engine would not run. 3.8l V6. Yum.
It's the choke.
No, it's the plugs, I tied the choke back with string and it didn't work.
It's the fuel filter.
It's bad fuel, was ready to drain 200l of unleaded, luckily the fuel guage was faulty and it only had a 1/4 tank.
It's the plugs.
It's definitely bad fuel.
It's the coil.
It's bad fuel. Tried it on a temporary tank and it ran.
For 5 minutes.
Float back to the side.
It's the carb, then.




It was the choke.
Didn't tie back well enough, obviously. Now I have a cable tie on it. I'll fix it this winter.

timolloyd

229 posts

159 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Friend of mine (truly) decided to do an oil change on his Fiesta. Drained the old oil, replaced the filter, re-fitted the sump plug and put the new oil in.





Almost all of it. As much of the 5 litre bottle as he could.


The smoke was impressive.

P I Staker

3,308 posts

155 months

Tuesday 9th October 2012
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Brigand said:
At the beginning of the year my Alfa GTV failed its MoT on a rusty back box, front wheel bearing going and rear brakes not working properly.

Easy fixes I thought.

Slipped new Cherry Bomb tailpipe on the rear, cleaned the rear calipers, un-stuck one of the pistons and put fresh pads on. Next job was to do the wheel bearing.

I went to test the brakes after fitting the new pads, and was confused when the pedal stayed spongy. I looked out the door to see an expanding puddle of brake fluid on the garage floor. Upon inspection I had managed to knock one of the brake line unions where they go into a small cube whilst I was fitting the back box.

I had no way of fixing the union myself on the garage floor, and the car couldn't be driven anywhere to repair it. Faced with an expensive bill to get it towed to a garage, I threw in the towel and flogged it on eBay.
I changed the rear axle on my 106 and managed to do something similar, battered the copper pipe flat with a hammer to seal it and drove the 25miles or so in to work to make a replacement pipe (I am an apprentice mechanic). smile

Putting it on Ebay didn't even come to mind if I'm honest. hehe

Issi

1,782 posts

149 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
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Spent a couple of hours trying to get the rear brake hubs off a Volvo, after swearing and bashing away I finally relented and looked in the Haynes manual for help.

Step 1. Release hand brake. D'oh!



toon10

6,140 posts

156 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
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When I was young my brother and I stripped his mk5 cortina engine down as it wasn't running. Spent ages, couldn't identify the issue so put it back together again. Still wouldn't run. My uncle then stripped it down and showed us a huge crack in the cylinder head we'd somehow not seen. Proper doh moment.

geeks

9,121 posts

138 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
quotequote all
Issi said:
Spent a couple of hours trying to get the rear brake hubs off a Volvo, after swearing and bashing away I finally relented and looked in the Haynes manual for help.

Step 1. Release hand brake. D'oh!
Been there boxedin

Replaced the driveshafts on an Ibiza, forgot to refil gearbox with oil.....

SuperchargedVR6

3,138 posts

219 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
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Too many blunders to list, but easily the most basic and most dangerous one to date has to be forgetting to torque the wheel bolts up on the nearside front wheel.

Amazingly, I drove a good 70 miles before I noticed. The steering wheel suddenly went floppy and wobbled about on the motorway.

Pulled into a layby fearing something much worse had broken. Looked around the car, couldn't see anything obvious. Was about to call the AA when I casually glanced at the wheel and noticed 3 bolts were missing and the 2 that remained weren't far off coming out themselves. I didn't have a wheelbrace in the boot, so had to call the AA anyway!

Probably the most embarrassing blunder was a clip on 'big bore' tailpipe that fell off at 80mph and smashed it's way through the car behind's front grille. I'm ashamed to admit I put my foot down and got out of there!



nosittap

381 posts

144 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
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Thought my front screen washer jets were broken, traced the pipes could't find any blockages, cleaned the jets out with pins still nothing, replaced the washer motor (about £12), still nothing, checked fuses and wireing, nothing.

With an upcoming MOT, I decided to swap the hoses for the rear with the front so the rear action operated the front so at least I wouldn't fail, but did get an advisory for it.

Only to realise later I was using the wrong action on the windscreen stalk when my hand slipped one day, and it was never broken.

It was my second car, and my first cars washer was operated by moving the stalk downwards like the indicating motion. It wasn't broken the whole time and was simply operated by pulling the stalk towards you, like putting on full beams.

To say the least I felt like a right idiot.

CDP

7,454 posts

253 months

Wednesday 10th October 2012
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My dad had to replace the steering box on his '64 VW camper.

The suppliers had given him a LHD unit by mistake.

It fitted but turning the wheel left made the van go right....