One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3

[Impasse]

Roger Irrelevant said:

vtecyo said:

Roger Irrelevant said:

Bloke up the road from me is leaving at the same time as me this morning. Bin lorry is slowly coming down the road. Bloke decides that getting out in front of the bin lorry is more important than clearing his screen of ice, so drives off with a totally opaque screen and his head sticking out of the window. Within the space of 100 metres mounts the kerb on the drivers side and very nearly hits the row of parked cars on the passenger side. If the bin lorry had got past him all it would have meant is that he would have had to have done a very easy 3-point turn to go the other way up the road. Utter .

Unless you live at the North Pole I'm calling dog egg on that one.

Northern England in 'Still Grim' Shocker.

/cough/

[Liquid Knight]

WD39 said:

scarble said:

Liquid Knight said:

I do hope you're trolling.
An IQ of 100 is average, average IQ is 100, that's how the scale is defined, therefore average IQ cannot change over time, it's always 100.
That's like saying the prototype kilogram doesn't weigh a kilogram any more, you could cut the thing in half and it'd still weigh a kilogram.
It's also just not true, average intelligence has gone up as various studies other than the dailyfail have shown.
A person's IQ is demonstrably raised by financial incentive.
IQ has never been linked to reaction time.

Sorry, but isn't trolling malicious and offensive posts, usually to celebs? I wouldn't have thought that stopping distances and IQ charts come under this category. Or am I lacking in the finer points and etiquette of discussion forums? (IQ unknown at this time).

Not trolling at all but making a valid point. The UK average IQ is 104.25 (I've been a member of Mensa since I was four) the graph clearly states and shows a world wide average and projected averages based on current and historic trends.

The argument that speed limits can be increased due to road surface, tyre, brake and other technology advancing is flawed by the recorded dumbing down of humanity as a species. When you see someone test this theory in a controlled environment like the clip on Top Gear a while back. A professional driver on a test track stopping between cones is not a plausible example of reality. It's about as realistic as MPG figures from a laboratory.

Braking distances may well be shorter but as I pointed out drivers are less aware, more distracted and thanks to things like crumple zones, airbags and being sat in a Faraday cage designed to protect the vehicles content drivers in modern cars feel invulnerable compared to a driver in a car from the 1950's or 60's.

By all means disagree and there's always room for a debate on a forum...

forum
Noun
A meeting or medium where ideas and views on a particular issue can be exchanged.

...but asking if I'm a "Troll" because you don't agree? You should be a moderator.

[yellowjack]

MarkRSi said:

Van drivers that pull out in front of you sloooooooooowly and force you to brake, like a fat person waddling out in front of you and taking up the entire width of the pavement

In both cases there was no traffic behind me so could have pulled out afterwards. Knobbing cockfking knobsockets!

Worse still, stupid fat fkers who look right at you, and wait. And wait. And wait some more, then, just when you assume they're going to wait until you've passed them, they pull out from a side road on the right. But that's not the end of it! This knob-end then decides to immediately turn left into a farm or some such. I swear the pie/key-looking, Sherpa driving, scrap metal carrying halfwit did it deliberately too. I was on a bicycle, by the way, and somehow managed to stop in time to avoid crashing into the rear of his crappy Sherpa pick-up, here...
https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.281825,-1.026318...

Then, later in the same 50 mile ride, a grotesque woman in a SEAT did the same thing from the left. Looked straight at me, decided to ignore both me, and the car behind me, and pulled out from the left, immediately slowed, and positioned to turn right here...
https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.260157,-0.82659,...

At no time did either of these retards use any form of indicator or turn signal, nor have any consideration for other road users. The horribly fat woman in case no 2 (one of those who you just know will stink without needing to get near enough to catch a whiff) was the one that REALLY pissed me off. She got a long blast on the horn from the driver behind me, to which she replied by raising her middle finger.

At this point my base instinct got the better of my judgement, and I (perhaps a little knobbishly) aimed a punch at her car. Sadly she moved off too soon, and it missed, but I've never before been so keen to drag someone from their car and beat them to death with a bicycle pump Fortunately, given the way she crossed in front of traffic from the opposite direction too, I was lucky I chose to pass to the left of her car, as there was absolutely no way I could have stopped (while retaining control) to avoid a collision. If I'd have chosen the right hand route, she'd likely have driven over me.

indeed

[g3org3y]

A13 out of London this morning. Individuals who seem to think it's fine to loiter in lane 3 at any speed (usually 65-68) with entirely clear Lane 1 and 2. Just fk off.

I don't want to be that BMW driver and pass on the inside but...oh well.

[Triumph Man]

MarkRSi said:

Van drivers that pull out in front of you sloooooooooowly and force you to brake, like a fat person waddling out in front of you and taking up the entire width of the pavement

In both cases there was no traffic behind me so could have pulled out afterwards. Knobbing cockfking knobsockets!

I had that yesterday, chap doesn't even look my way, pulls out, and then diddles along at 15 or so mph. I gave a little bip on the horn, to be met with a loud "fk OFF!" I wouldn't have as much of a problem if he had just got on with it...

[Mafffew]

A white Qashqai driver in Beaconsfield. This /wker parks (link below) in the same place on double yellows every weekday evening (at least). I know this because it is part of my evening commute.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.610206,-0.644279...

I have no idea who they are, or why they do it, but it is really beginning to get on my nerves, every time I see it I pray that a bus or a truck smashes into the side of it. Or they at least get a parking ticket and slap to head. If I get the chance I'll nab a picture tonight.

Oh and once again I got cut across on a roundabout (link below) and once again it's in Beaconsfield. There is something about this town and many of the old bints inhabiting it. Story is pretty simple, I'm going to turn right indicator is on and I'm in the right lane, as I get onto the roundabout this old bat decides now is a good idea to try and get across. Anchors on, horn on, very loud and foul language from me (window was open too, oops). Why? I even saw her fking look to my car before she did. The guy to her left didn't go, but she did and I almost had her back end.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.602198,-0.631651...

Edited by Mafffew on Wednesday 15th April 11:13

[ORD]

Mafffew said:

A white Qashqai driver in Beaconsfield. This /wker parks (link below) in the same place on double yellows every weekday evening (at least). I know this because it is part of my evening commute.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.610206,-0.644279...

I have no idea who they are, or why they do it, but it is really beginning to get on my nerves, every time I see it I pray that a bus or a truck smashes into the side of it. Or they at least get a parking ticket and slap to head. If I get the chance I'll nab a picture tonight.

Oh and once again I got cut across on a roundabout (link below) and once again it's in Beaconsfield. There is something about this town and many of the old bints inhabiting it. Story is pretty simple, I'm going to turn right indicator is on and I'm in the right lane, as I get onto the roundabout this old bat decides now is a good idea to try and get across. Anchors on, horn on, very loud and foul language from me (window was open too, oops). Why? I even saw her fking look to my car before she did. The guy to her left didn't go, but she did and I almost had her back end.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.602198,-0.631651...

Edited by Mafffew on Wednesday 15th April 11:13

Beaconsfield is terrible for driving standards. Those two little roundabouts appear to be exempt from the Highway Code.

[scarble]

WD39 said:

Sorry, but isn't trolling malicious and offensive posts, usually to celebs? I wouldn't have thought that stopping distances and IQ charts come under this category. Or am I lacking in the finer points and etiquette of discussion forums? (IQ unknown at this time).

You're lacking the finer points, you're going with the recently appeared media definition, trolling is originally the slightly less extreme posting of nonsense with the intention of eliciting an irate response, e.g. suggesting converting a Ferrari into an MR2 and in doing so increasing the horsepower due to the lower weight.

Liquid Knight said:

Not trolling at all but making a valid point. The UK average IQ is 104.25 (I've been a member of Mensa since I was four) the graph clearly states and shows a world wide average and projected averages based on current and historic trends.

100 is the world wide average, it is regularly normalised and that is how the scale is defined.
For someone in Mensa from age four you seem to lack an understanding of how measuring things works

[ORD]

scarble said:

100 is the world wide average, it is regularly normalised and that is how the scale is defined.
For someone in Mensa from age four you seem to lack an understanding of how measuring things works

He also writes like a semi-literate 12 year-old. But that just confirms my existing view of Mensa (not very smart people sitting around talking about how smart they are rather than doing something useful).

[Horse Pop]

OG trolling was basically posting stuff to get a response.

Trolling is named for a type of fishing.

You'd put bait out and see if you got a tug.

Back in the olden days of people on the internet not being delicate flowers, if you just went in with something obviously offensive people would block / killfile you so you couldn't really just post WARGH BLARGH st COCKS and have it count because it was so ineffective.

The trick was to post something innocuous looking that would still get a huge response.

I suppose the PH version would be dissing MX-5s/TVRs or posting something about cyclists.

http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-languag...

http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/what-trolling-means...

http://www.adequacy.org/stories/2001.12.2.42056.21...

As it is a neologism I suppose you can't get too sniffy when it is used wrong. Still makes me wince.

Edited by Horse Pop on Wednesday 15th April 13:48

Edited by Horse Pop on Wednesday 15th April 13:49

[Spooge]

Liquid Knight said:

(I've been a member of Mensa since I was four)

That made me think "knob".

[LaurasOtherHalf]

The guy with the number plate who signed up to PH to reply to this thread;

http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&a...

[masermartin]

LaurasOtherHalf said:

The guy with the number plate who signed up to PH to reply to this thread;

http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&a...

Why so? I thought it was funny tbh. If there's no attachment to the plate, why not sell it if someone really wants to buy it?

[Tyre Tread]

Person on classic car forum complaining at having to fork out £5.00 for brake parts = knob

[Happyjap]

yellowjack said:

One single thing that makes me think "knob"?

Idiots so desperate to be the first to post on a new volume, that they'll post the sum total of naff all to do it...

Nice one!

[Mafffew]

ORD said:

Beaconsfield is terrible for driving standards. Those two little roundabouts appear to be exempt from the Highway Code.

Definitely agree on that one! The new cycle lanes and zebra crossings haven't helped matters either.

[knitware]

Spooge said:

That made me think "knob".

Me too but then I felt sorry for the chap for having pushy parents, I mean who the hell thinks that their child is suitable, ready and would enjoy being in MENSA at age 4. Knob parents, that’s who.

[vtecyo]

Roger Irrelevant said:

vtecyo said:

Roger Irrelevant said:

Bloke up the road from me is leaving at the same time as me this morning. Bin lorry is slowly coming down the road. Bloke decides that getting out in front of the bin lorry is more important than clearing his screen of ice, so drives off with a totally opaque screen and his head sticking out of the window. Within the space of 100 metres mounts the kerb on the drivers side and very nearly hits the row of parked cars on the passenger side. If the bin lorry had got past him all it would have meant is that he would have had to have done a very easy 3-point turn to go the other way up the road. Utter .

Unless you live at the North Pole I'm calling dog egg on that one.

Northern England in 'Still Quite Chilly at Start of April' Shocker.

I stand corrected... you poor sods! Been in shorts and T shirt for a week now.

[glasgowrob]

lights were red as they all approached,

Well done so called professional drivers

[MajorMantra]

Horse Pop said:

OG trolling was basically posting stuff to get a response.

Trolling is named for a type of fishing.

You'd put bait out and see if you got a tug.

Back in the olden days of people on the internet not being delicate flowers, if you just went in with something obviously offensive people would block / killfile you so you couldn't really just post WARGH BLARGH st COCKS and have it count because it was so ineffective.

The trick was to post something innocuous looking that would still get a huge response.

I suppose the PH version would be dissing MX-5s/TVRs or posting something about cyclists.

http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-languag...

http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/what-trolling-means...

http://www.adequacy.org/stories/2001.12.2.42056.21...

As it is a neologism I suppose you can't get too sniffy when it is used wrong. Still makes me wince.

Edited by Horse Pop on Wednesday 15th April 13:48

Edited by Horse Pop on Wednesday 15th April 13:49

Quoted for truth.

The media always messes up internet/tech jargon. Or uses it in ways no normal human does. Like the way "cyber" gets prefixed to everything. (NOBODY SAYS THIS!)

Or what about the word "hacked". As in, someone "hacked the [whatever organistation]'s twitter account". No they bloody didn't.