Stupid things non petrolheads say... Vol 2

Stupid things non petrolheads say... Vol 2

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Discussion

Vitorio

4,296 posts

142 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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DELETED: Comment made by a member who's account has been deleted.
a peugeot garage dude that doesnt know about the 106 S1 rallye?

Strudul

1,585 posts

84 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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Went into a Nissan Service Centre...

Me: Do you stock release / throwout bearings for a 350Z

Receptionist: What's a 350Z


sonnenschein3000

710 posts

89 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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My sister car shopping.

They test drove a used Macan S (diesel) which I thought was absolutely brilliant, but she drove it and said it was absolute rubbish and was 'too heavy'. She currently drives a freelander with a 4 cylinder diesel.

I gave up at that point.

droopsnoot

11,817 posts

241 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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DELETED: Comment made by a member who's account has been deleted.
There are many of these - a mate once had a Bedford CF 4x4, visited the local dealer (in it) to be told there was no such thing, even though (a) it was outside, and (b) they'd sold it new. I guess that's maybe a bit more forgivable.

Muddle238

3,871 posts

112 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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Memorable one for me was when I went to the dealer to buy a part. After giving them the registration so they could find my car in their system, they ask a load of unrelated questions such as colour etc, then eventually comes the best one, "is it a 3-door or a 5-door?"

The car was only ever made as a 5-door. And this was at a main dealer.

limpsfield

5,871 posts

252 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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HappyMidget said:
bad company said:
I also have no idea or interest in what a camshaft is.
Over 15 years on here and you know not what a camshaft is? Impressive.
Me neither. And all that BMW e39, e36 bks? No idea.

Sillyhatday

441 posts

98 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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While on the subject of parts. I called Toyota last year for service parts and general enquiry into what they still make, for my MR2.

Toyota: "Hello"
Me: "Hi, could you put me through to parts please?"
Toyota: "Who is calling?"
Me: "Its 'Mr Sillyhat'. Could you put me through?"
Toyota: "What is it your calling about?"
Me: "I'm calling about getting some parts for an old Toyota"
Toyota: "OK, what model is it?"
Me: "Well, you don't make it anymore and I was hoping to see what parts availability is like"
Toyota: "OK, but what car is it?"
  • Toyota getting annoyed now*
Me: "OK sure, you might be able to help. It's an MR2 from 1986 and I want some service parts for it"
Toyota: " .... "
Me: "So I'm just wondering what other parts you still make for it"
Toyota: "Oh, I don't know what that is. I'll put you through to parts."
banghead Slightly off topic.

I also had a friend who used to say how fast there car was, once the turbo switched on above 30mph. To which I replied with basic theory on how it works, you know that it's based on engine speed and throttle position. Nice and simple to help them out. To them ignoring it totally, saying that there cars is was on all the time above 30mph. To my response of, "Oh cool". They seemed happy with themselves, I wasn't going to burst there bubble.

Disastrous

10,072 posts

216 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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limpsfield said:
HappyMidget said:
bad company said:
I also have no idea or interest in what a camshaft is.
Over 15 years on here and you know not what a camshaft is? Impressive.
Me neither. And all that BMW e39, e36 bks? No idea.
Same tbh. I sort of vaguely know how an engine works but couldn't really give a st either way. I just like driving them and looking at them, not knowing more about them than other people.

threespires

4,289 posts

210 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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In defence of underpaid Parts people everywhere, those parts manuals are poorly written and incredibly difficult to understand.
It takes years to master them, and as soon as you've done that - the stoopid manufacturer decides to revamp the whole system & you're back to day 1.





Willy Nilly

12,511 posts

166 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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More than once I have ordered parts for a machine with the serial number, model number, part number and still failed to get the right parts.

cvms

22 posts

100 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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I owned an Impreza turbo a long time ago, brought it second hand off a guy who'd brought it new from Holland when scoobys were sought-after, discounts non existent and waiting lists long.

First service was due so booked into a dealer in East London; service manager picks it up on his way in as he passes my work - handy. At lunchtime my then wife calls me as the garage have phoned home for me, even though they had my work number and I was at work of course.

I call them back and they tell me they haven't been able to start work on my car as they can't find the locking wheel nut key. I ask them if they've actually looked at the wheels, to which they ask why, for me to then tell them that it doesn't have locking wheel nuts... Que rather embarrassed apology and an assurance that car would be serviced and ready for when I finished work.

Even if they were expecting it to have them (I believe UK spec ones did), a quick look at the wheels when they couldn't find the key probably might have given them a clue. spin

bad company

18,484 posts

265 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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limpsfield said:
HappyMidget said:
bad company said:
I also have no idea or interest in what a camshaft is.
Over 15 years on here and you know not what a camshaft is? Impressive.
Me neither. And all that BMW e39, e36 bks? No idea.
And I'm guessing no interest in 'e' numbers either.

Edited by bad company on Wednesday 26th April 23:11

ChocolateFrog

24,869 posts

172 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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cvms said:
I owned an Impreza turbo a long time ago, brought it second hand off a guy who'd brought it new from Holland when scoobys were sought-after, discounts non existent and waiting lists long.

First service was due so booked into a dealer in East London; service manager picks it up on his way in as he passes my work - handy. At lunchtime my then wife calls me as the garage have phoned home for me, even though they had my work number and I was at work of course.

I call them back and they tell me they haven't been able to start work on my car as they can't find the locking wheel nut key. I ask them if they've actually looked at the wheels, to which they ask why, for me to then tell them that it doesn't have locking wheel nuts... Que rather embarrassed apology and an assurance that car would be serviced and ready for when I finished work.

Even if they were expecting it to have them (I believe UK spec ones did), a quick look at the wheels when they couldn't find the key probably might have given them a clue. spin
Bought.

Ironic given the thread.

cvms

22 posts

100 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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ChocolateFrog said:
cvms said:
I owned an Impreza turbo a long time ago, brought it second hand off etc etc, blah blah,. spin
Bought.

Ironic given the thread.
Indeed. Piss poor on my part and apologies for my grammar slippage, I am suitably embarrassed wink

Rostfritt

3,098 posts

150 months

Wednesday 26th April 2017
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threespires said:
In defence of underpaid Parts people everywhere, those parts manuals are poorly written and incredibly difficult to understand.
It takes years to master them, and as soon as you've done that - the stoopid manufacturer decides to revamp the whole system & you're back to day 1.
I think the case with the guy asking for all the details before transferring to the parts department was a case of the guy trying to help out instead of passing every parts call through to an overworked colleague.

Sillyhatday

441 posts

98 months

Thursday 27th April 2017
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Possible. I wasn't irritated and remained polite. If I remember I'd called about something else, which they put me through without asking, immediately. My bad assumption it could be.

Blown2CV

28,698 posts

202 months

Thursday 27th April 2017
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10b0b said:
On pulling a Model S onto the drive, next door neighbor (nice chap, but a bit simple) gives a it a good ogle.

Him: "Nice motor! New car? Cool! What liter is it?"
Me: "Sorry?"
Him: "How many liter is it? You know engine liters?"
Me: "Did you not notice the complete lack of engine sound?"
Him: "Oh yeah.... oh is it battery? A battery car?"
Me: "Yeah... you're on the right lines"
Him: "Ahhh cool... how many battery liters?"

The last line cracked me up biggrin
yea how many litres of battery fluid are in the batteries?!

Lance Catamaran

24,942 posts

226 months

Thursday 27th April 2017
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Rostfritt said:
threespires said:
In defence of underpaid Parts people everywhere, those parts manuals are poorly written and incredibly difficult to understand.
It takes years to master them, and as soon as you've done that - the stoopid manufacturer decides to revamp the whole system & you're back to day 1.
I think the case with the guy asking for all the details before transferring to the parts department was a case of the guy trying to help out instead of passing every parts call through to an overworked colleague.
I worked for Citroen parts quite some time ago, and still distinctly remember one of the listings for the Xsara was a bodyshell with weapons mounting points. Oddly no one ever needed parts for that one

zedx19

2,704 posts

139 months

Thursday 27th April 2017
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Upon arriving to work in my Focus ST 225, questions started,

Colleague:- What engines in it?
Me:- 2.5 turbo, 5 cylinder
Is it diesel?
No its petrol
Why didn't you get a diesel? Is it at least automatic?
No its manual
Oh, why did you buy it then?
Because I wanted something fun with character
  • silence*

Peanut Gallery

2,418 posts

109 months

Thursday 27th April 2017
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Muddle238 said:
Memorable one for me was when I went to the dealer to buy a part. After giving them the registration so they could find my car in their system, they ask a load of unrelated questions such as colour etc, then eventually comes the best one, "is it a 3-door or a 5-door?"

The car was only ever made as a 5-door. And this was at a main dealer.
I went into a Ford parts place, shortly after I had put my private reg on the car. They had the old reg, the new reg, AND the VIN number. Still sold me the wrong bit. (fortunately I checked in the car park and had them change it for the correct bit.) Seriously, they had the VIN number!

That said I give a shout out for one of our local scrappers places, what look like some girls just out of school trying to find a summer job, they sure know different models of cars, and what fits what etc!