Thursday 11th May 2017

Dude I almost had you: PH Blog

Jeep versus Jeep in a quarter-mile battle royale

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Walking alongside Santa Pod as the jet-car dried the incredibly sticky surface, plenty of flags fly high down the quarter-mile. Even the flag of Malta - my native country - proudly flaps in the wind. A good omen?

They've had weirder stuff go down...

Malta has a good track record - pardon the pun - as far as drag racing goes too. Fellow Maltese Duncan Micallef, a pro racer of Top Fuel dragsters, set a track record at Santa Pod in September last year with a 1,000ft time of 3.89 seconds at 312mph . I wouldn't be going that fast, and the car lined up for me probably wouldn't be people's first choice to take to a drag strip: the Jeep Grand Cherokee SRT. Yes, an SUV on a drag strip. It does have 467hp though... The idea for the day is to see whether is to see whether a bunch of entirely novice racers can beat UK drag racing champion Stuart Doignie across three timed runs. In identical cars...

Drag racing isn't as simple as it looks on YouTube, or in Fast & Furious, with many a seasoned racer breaking important oily bits on the sticky surface. Along with those worries, there are the complications of 'pre-staging' and 'staging', vitally important for securing those extra few inches that could mean a win or a loss when racing identical models. Thankfully, this concept isn't completely alien to me having been involved with our RS7 v. Panamera shoot at Santa Pod a few weeks earlier.

Guaranteed a close race at least...

Basically, before you get counted down on the drag lights, the car has to be 'pre-staged' and 'staged'. There are 20cm between the pre-stage beam and the stage beam, meaning to get those few extra centimetres over Stuart I had to position the SRT perfectly. Thankfully I had two practice runs to get my reaction time down to something respectable - having started at 0.81sec I finally had it down to 0.19sec, which I'd call progress!

With 467hp, 4WD and launch control the SRT is happier on the strip than you might imagine, evinced by two practice runs of 13.4 seconds. However, much like an Olympic sprinter, times drop when actually competing. That is where it was all going to count! I lined up in the left-hand lane, in my mind perfectly 'staged'. The little launch control button on the centre console pushed, left foot pushed hard down to the floor and right foot building the revs in anticipation... Foot off the brake as the third yellow light illuminates and we're away! The SRT surges forward at some pace, hitting 103mph and 13.2 seconds at the quarter-mile mark - win!

There's quick and then there's quick on the strip!

Second run and a win would ensure that Stuart couldn't claw it back on the final run. We both got off to a great launch, again aided with launch control - well, for me anyway, but he still beat me by 0.1 seconds. Thankfully when we got back, Stuart's first loss had clearly got to him and he had jumped the lights - second win to me too!

Being quite the sore winner, I thought in the third and final run I had to beat Stuart to rub salt into the wounds. But to my dismay, Stuart got it together, stormed off the line with lightning reactions and beat me. The Jeep Grand Cherokee SRT certainly left with its dignity intact though, and I was going too as well... right up until the dragster passenger ride that is, which scared me silly!

Nik

[Source: Jeep, Performance Racing]

[SturdyHSV]

So although it's harder than it looks, utter novices beat the UK champion after a few practice runs?

That didn't do the sport's reputation many favours then!

[Krikkit]

SturdyHSV said:

So although it's harder than it looks, utter novices beat the UK champion after a few practice runs?

That didn't do the sport's reputation many favours then!

It sounds like Stuart wasn't using LC, and had to trip the final bits of staging rather than just cruising to a stop and loading the torque converter up.

[xjay1337]

Drag racing in modern cars is not hard at all.
Put it in D and turn on launch control.

Gone are the days of carefully balanced launches and side-stepping the clutch .

[Jonmx]

xjay1337 said:

Drag racing in modern cars is not hard at all.
Put it in D and turn on launch control.

Gone are the days of carefully balanced launches and side-stepping the clutch .

Many videos of American rich kids in daddy's Tesla doing exactly that and then bragging about it. Sad really. I used to love the traffic light grand prix in my 1.8 Mondeo on the Kingsway in Swansea back in the day. As you suggest, it's a dying art.

[540cortina]

So Stuart wasn't using driver aids (launch control) and you were? Not cooooompletely even then....

[xjay1337]

Jonmx said:

xjay1337 said:

Drag racing in modern cars is not hard at all.
Put it in D and turn on launch control.

Gone are the days of carefully balanced launches and side-stepping the clutch .

Many videos of American rich kids in daddy's Tesla doing exactly that and then bragging about it. Sad really. I used to love the traffic light grand prix in my 1.8 Mondeo on the Kingsway in Swansea back in the day. As you suggest, it's a dying art.

Yup - You can't argue with the brutal effectiveness of automatic gearboxes and launch control, but it doesn't half take the fun out of it.

[SuperchargedVR6]

Jonmx said:

xjay1337 said:

Drag racing in modern cars is not hard at all.
Put it in D and turn on launch control.

Gone are the days of carefully balanced launches and side-stepping the clutch .

Many videos of American rich kids in daddy's Tesla doing exactly that and then bragging about it. Sad really. I used to love the traffic light grand prix in my 1.8 Mondeo on the Kingsway in Swansea back in the day. As you suggest, it's a dying art.

You mean that hick kid 'Tesla Racing channel'? He has a very lenient Dad because he stripped the interior out and fitted different wheels on the last video I watched.

All of that aside and Teslas ripping up the 1/4 mile wearing thin, the P100D is an incredible machine. I wouldn't give a crap how easy or difficult it is to launch it if I owned one. Being flung back in the seat like that never gets old.

[99dndd]

Almost had me?

You never had me, you never had your car!

[TurboHatchback]

Drag racing in general mystifies me but drag racing automatic AWD road cars all the more so. Where is the skill and what is the point?

[Camaro]

SturdyHSV said:

So although it's harder than it looks, utter novices beat the UK champion after a few practice runs?

That didn't do the sport's reputation many favours then!

How's getting that 500hp down on the track going for you?

[MrBarry123]

99dndd said:

Almost had me?

You never had me, you never had your car!

Granny shiftin', not double clutchin' like you should. You're lucky that hundred shot of NOS didnt blow the welds on the intake. Almost had me? Now me and the mad scientist gotta rip apart the block, and replace the piston rings you fried! Ask any racer, any real racer, it don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.

[anonymous-user]

TurboHatchback said:

Drag racing in general mystifies me but drag racing automatic AWD road cars all the more so. Where is the skill and what is the point?

I found it quite challenging, but I'm not a driving god. My previous race car didn't have much power (only around 2250hp, but no driver aids or aero). Full steering lock at 190mph with one front wheel in the sky gets your attention. It's quite hard to keep it in your lane when that's going on.

Horses for courses really. Unfortunately as much as motor sport enthusiasts generally have an interest in many formula / disciplines, there's little in the way of respect for each other when circuit racers talk about drag racers, and vice versa. I like all sorts of racing so it's awkward when I hear someone going on about "those folk what just drive around in circles" countered by "you only drive in a straight line". We're all into different things and there's different skill sets involved in each.

[540cortina]

Camaro said:

SturdyHSV said:

So although it's harder than it looks, utter novices beat the UK champion after a few practice runs?

That didn't do the sport's reputation many favours then!

How's getting that 500hp down on the track going for you?

500 horses should be low 12's/high 11's surely... I've only got 413 ponies and cracked 12.46 on mud n' snow tyres.. hehe

[540cortina]

Camaro said:

SturdyHSV said:

So although it's harder than it looks, utter novices beat the UK champion after a few practice runs?

That didn't do the sport's reputation many favours then!

How's getting that 500hp down on the track going for you?

500 horses should be low 12's/high 11's surely... I've only got 413 ponies and cracked 12.46 on mud n' snow tyres.. hehe

[Nigel_O]

Now try it with 450bhp, 'wrong' wheel drive and no traction aids - very difficult to get a clean launch, but I eventually ran a 12.37, then gave up after I left most of the diff casing on the start line....

I can see why it's addictive

[ToothbrushMan]

xjay1337 said:

Gone are the days of carefully balanced launches and side-stepping the clutch .

i hope youre talking about two totally different "techniques" here? side stepping the clutch is hardly a carefully balanced launch.

[308mate]

If the idea was genuinely to see if a novice could beat a pro in identical cars, why on earth did you choose a car that negates the element of skill? That's called a forgone conclusion. Unless the idea was really for Jeep to show the masses that nowadays "anyone can be a pro drag racer"?