Getting property back from an ex.

[fred flange]

Can anyone on here let me know where I stand on this ? I've been asking for over six weeks now for my stuff back that my ex has at her house but it's proving difficult as she will not communicate with me at all,ignoring my texts and blocking my number.she is now threatening(via a mutual friend) to go to the police for harassment where all I want to do is arrange a mutual time and if needed a neutral meeting place as she doesn't want me turning up at hers!
Where do I stand if I did turn up at her place demanding my stuff back would I be liable to arrest?

[Jasandjules]

Ask the police to attend her address to recover your property - they can attend to prevent a breach of the peace. Tell her you will be coming to collect your stuff on Saturday at X time and the police will be in attendance with you.

[allergictocheese]

So long as you're genuinely trying to get your stuff back and in the circumstances your behaviour is reasonable, there's no harassment.

Be careful turning up unannounced, as you may find yourself asked to leave by BIB to avoid breach of the peace.

[carreauchompeur]

^^^

This is the CORRECT way to go about things but the chances of there being a cop available at the appointed time are very low. It'll be a question of luck. Anyone neutral who could attend on your behalf?

Oh, and what did you DO?

[andburg]

Alternatively you could drop by the local neighborhood policing office and speak to a PCSO

edit: if things are so aggravated that she wont speak to you you may not have any property left to collect.

Edited by andburg on Thursday 8th January 10:23

[Vaud]

Can you not ask this mutual friend to be the go between and pass on the property to you? That's generally what friends are good at?

Or a different friend? If she really doesn't want to meet you then removing you from the equation might make her more rational to passing on the property?

[PAULJ5555]

Contact the police before she does, ask for help get it recorded on there system.

Ask the bib to attend because you think she will cause a trouble.

[Vaud]

PAULJ5555 said:

Contact the police before she does, ask for help get it recorded on there system.

Ask the bib to attend because you think she will cause a trouble.

Or just avoid further winding her up, use an intermediary and save the police time?

[PAULJ5555]

Vaud said:

PAULJ5555 said:

Contact the police before she does, ask for help get it recorded on there system.

Ask the bib to attend because you think she will cause a trouble.

Or just avoid further winding her up, use an intermediary and save the police time?

Oh yes, the police will tell you its a civil matter and to go away.

[Vaud]

PAULJ5555 said:

Oh yes, the police will tell you its a civil matter and to go away.

Well it is...

OP, do you want see her, or do you just want your stuff back?

[allergictocheese]

PAULJ5555 said:

Oh yes, the police will tell you its a civil matter and to go away.

If you arrive and it becomes obvious there is likely to be argy bargy, the Police are duty bound to attend to prevent a breach of the peace.

Having said that, they are not there to facilitate entry to someone else's premises to alleviate a civil dispute or return property. If they do need to attend, and the OP explains calmly and rationally that all he wants is XYZ possessions from inside the house, and the ex doesn't dispute that they're his, I'd imaging most sensible officers would have a word in her ear and try to resolve things, though.

[Vaud]

allergictocheese said:

If you arrive and it becomes obvious there is likely to be argy bargy, the Police are duty bound to attend to prevent a breach of the peace.

Having said that, they are not there to facilitate entry to someone else's premises to alleviate a civil dispute or return property. If they do need to attend, and the OP explains calmly and rationally that all he wants is XYZ possessions from inside the house, and the ex doesn't dispute that they're his, I'd imaging most sensible officers would have a word in her ear and try to resolve things, though.

Which is still an aggressive approach. Better to use a middle party and avoid angst and save police time.