Had to share these!
Discussion
To cheer up some of my S pals who are a bit miffed with work.....
Essential NEW WORDS FOR 2004 editions for the work-place vocabulary.
TESTICULATING
Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks.
BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, cr*ps on everything, and
then
leaves.
ASSMOSIS.
The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by
sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get
screwed and die.
CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.
PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's
heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to
applause from a promotion because there may be cake.)
MOUSE POTATO.
The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
SITCOMs.
Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into
when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the
kids or start a "home business".
STRESS PUPPY.
A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
XEROX SUBSIDY.
Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the cr*p out of an electronic device to get it to
work again.
ADMINISPHERE.
The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file.
Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly
inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
This is often affiliated with the dreaded administrivia" needless paperwork
and processes.
404.
Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not
Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located.
OHNOSECOND
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just made
a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')
WOOFies.
Well Off Older Folk.
CROP DUSTING.
Surreptitiously farting while passing through a cube farm, then enjoying
the sounds of dismay and disgust; leads to PRAIRIE DOGGING
Essential NEW WORDS FOR 2004 editions for the work-place vocabulary.
TESTICULATING
Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks.
BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, cr*ps on everything, and
then
leaves.
ASSMOSIS.
The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by
sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get
screwed and die.
CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.
PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's
heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to
applause from a promotion because there may be cake.)
MOUSE POTATO.
The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
SITCOMs.
Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into
when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the
kids or start a "home business".
STRESS PUPPY.
A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
XEROX SUBSIDY.
Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the cr*p out of an electronic device to get it to
work again.
ADMINISPHERE.
The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file.
Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly
inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
This is often affiliated with the dreaded administrivia" needless paperwork
and processes.
404.
Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not
Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located.
OHNOSECOND
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just made
a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')
WOOFies.
Well Off Older Folk.
CROP DUSTING.
Surreptitiously farting while passing through a cube farm, then enjoying
the sounds of dismay and disgust; leads to PRAIRIE DOGGING
very good!
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