Inappropriate behaviour - what should I have done
Inappropriate behaviour - what should I have done
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fido

Original Poster:

18,672 posts

280 months

Wednesday 29th April
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The initial message was deleted from this topic on 29 April 2026 at 13:45

fido

Original Poster:

18,672 posts

280 months

Wednesday 29th April
quotequote all
I know people have their own issues but when you take it out on someone else it becomes bullying/harassment - that we can all agree on.

This chap who I don't work with but happens to sit near me - decided to use me as target practice - won't go into details but it whacked me on the ear.

When I asked him why he did that he replied "felt like it". Later on that day he said "what would you do if I did that again?"

I went over to him and shouted at him "what his problem was?". Just to add he also called me a "nerd" which in these times might be considered a compliment but he certainly didn't mean it that way. This was reported to our bosses and dealt with quietly.

Because I rested my hands on him whilst asking him "what his problem was?" I was also chastised and it went on my appraisal, albeit mildly.

It's mostly under the bridge and we now avoid each other but I feel that it should not be on my file because I was provoked and did not instigate the incident in any way.

I thus made a formal complaint to senior HR person - citing this person is in a senior legal position and should be dealt with more severely. TBH I don't know what 'punishment' or comments were on his appraisal but he never made an apology which I think ranks of unprofessionalism. If nothing happens and I at least have marked his HR card then at least I felt i did the right thing (in case does anything in the future to anyone else).

Wacky Racer

40,878 posts

272 months

Wednesday 29th April
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What was "it"?

A pencil rubber or something heavy?

Has he made a complaint about you "touching him"?

Sounds like a stupid bored kid in a junior school classroom.

fido

Original Poster:

18,672 posts

280 months

Wednesday 29th April
quotequote all
Wacky Racer said:
What was "it"?

A pencil rubber or something heavy?

Has he made a complaint about you "touching him"?

Sounds like a stupid bored kid in a junior school classroom.
A small bit of plastic but it was did hurt for a few seconds. He went in full defence mode when questioned by bosses and said i laid hands on him! Yes, it's something I haven't encountered since Third grade and not something I expect from a grown man with a responsible job! Like I said, his lack of apology either straight after the incident or when he was chastised by our bosses is the reason I put in a formal complaint.

Edited by fido on Wednesday 29th April 13:59

Unreal

9,570 posts

50 months

Thursday 7th May
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If you're unhappy with the way it has been dealt with then consider using the grievance procedure.

Just think carefully about what you want before going down that route. 'Not being very happy' won't cut it.

simon_harris

2,771 posts

59 months

Thursday 7th May
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This is PH so clearly you should have dominated his stairs with your lawn sausages, posted a pic of you doing so while covered in custard, moved house and then slept with his dad.

dingg

4,490 posts

244 months

Thursday 7th May
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Ignore him

Get some dog st ,rub it on his car door handles

Don't get caught.

Do it again a few months later