Adult autism diagnosis - any use?
Discussion
TLDR: does a diagnosis of ASD, in your 40s, actually have any benefit? Specifically, when it comes to the workplace and finding a way to get the best out of you whilst not feeling like your brain is going through a mincer?
The long version:
I am in my 40s. I have, since childhood, had what would be termed "autistic tendencies" and participate in what I now know to be called "masking". Nothing too debilitating, if I am on the spectrum then I'm high functioning. As two of my nephews are profoundly autistic I have some appreciation that the struggles I face are orders of magnitude less than those of people who are far down the other end of the spectrum.
It's never been something I've felt much need to investigate until the last two years. My daughter exhibits similar traits, and I see her struggling with some of the same matters of "understanding people" and "the world isn't as it should be" that I have always struggled with. My mind turns to how I can prepare her for a world that is frankly disorganised and stupid, and what tools I can equip her with to reduce stress and anxiety along the way.
However... Recently my brain's workings have been causing me real problems at work. I need focus time. I cannot flick from task to task. Recently my job has evolved (without me being part of the decision) into one where I am expected to flick between tasks ad hoc, on the whims of four different bosses, each with their own sense of priorities. The result is that instead of having focused time to work on each problem (somewhat sequentially) I am expected to switch in and out of tasks with abandon.
My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
I wonder if seeking out some assessment of neurological differences might help. A piece of paper to point to that means my employer will take note that they need to let me focus, or we need to spread the work across more people instead of me trying to spin plates. Or, they'll need to explain that adjustments can't be made and I need to look for a new appointment. Which would be a shame because I quite liked the job and the people before.
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
I should say the issue is not one of mental capability; a physical analogue would be starting off by asking Geoff Capes to lift a 50lb barbell, but then ask him to suddenly put that one down and lift this other one over here. No, not that one, this one. Why are you lifting that one Geoff? I already told you I wanted THAT barbell lifted by the end of the week and you're lifting that other guy's barbells. Come on Geoff, can't you lift a 50lb barbell?! Geoff Capes could lift that barbell with one finger, but he couldn't switch between several different barbells like that.
Now... when I was 5, following some observations by my school about some behaviours, I was assessed for something. I remember having to play with toys and talk to some adults while my mum had to sit off to the side. My parents spoke of it a few times, but never said anything of any conclusions drawn and I never thought to ask. Unfortunately my mum died a few years ago and my dad has a swiss cheese brain, so I'll never know.
The long version:
I am in my 40s. I have, since childhood, had what would be termed "autistic tendencies" and participate in what I now know to be called "masking". Nothing too debilitating, if I am on the spectrum then I'm high functioning. As two of my nephews are profoundly autistic I have some appreciation that the struggles I face are orders of magnitude less than those of people who are far down the other end of the spectrum.
It's never been something I've felt much need to investigate until the last two years. My daughter exhibits similar traits, and I see her struggling with some of the same matters of "understanding people" and "the world isn't as it should be" that I have always struggled with. My mind turns to how I can prepare her for a world that is frankly disorganised and stupid, and what tools I can equip her with to reduce stress and anxiety along the way.
However... Recently my brain's workings have been causing me real problems at work. I need focus time. I cannot flick from task to task. Recently my job has evolved (without me being part of the decision) into one where I am expected to flick between tasks ad hoc, on the whims of four different bosses, each with their own sense of priorities. The result is that instead of having focused time to work on each problem (somewhat sequentially) I am expected to switch in and out of tasks with abandon.
My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
I wonder if seeking out some assessment of neurological differences might help. A piece of paper to point to that means my employer will take note that they need to let me focus, or we need to spread the work across more people instead of me trying to spin plates. Or, they'll need to explain that adjustments can't be made and I need to look for a new appointment. Which would be a shame because I quite liked the job and the people before.
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
I should say the issue is not one of mental capability; a physical analogue would be starting off by asking Geoff Capes to lift a 50lb barbell, but then ask him to suddenly put that one down and lift this other one over here. No, not that one, this one. Why are you lifting that one Geoff? I already told you I wanted THAT barbell lifted by the end of the week and you're lifting that other guy's barbells. Come on Geoff, can't you lift a 50lb barbell?! Geoff Capes could lift that barbell with one finger, but he couldn't switch between several different barbells like that.
Now... when I was 5, following some observations by my school about some behaviours, I was assessed for something. I remember having to play with toys and talk to some adults while my mum had to sit off to the side. My parents spoke of it a few times, but never said anything of any conclusions drawn and I never thought to ask. Unfortunately my mum died a few years ago and my dad has a swiss cheese brain, so I'll never know.
Wow, you've described me, and my daughter.
I've always known I'm different, at a young age there were noises I just couldn't stand.
And jobs, just one at a time, but my observation skills are another level (many car dealers describing my eye)
I've wondered whether a diag would be needed?
I haven't bothered as I function 95% ok
But I do wear my hidden disability lanyard when on cruise boats, and on public transport (explains me having to wear earphone sometimes)
So I'll follow your thread with much interest.
First thing I'd do with work is tell them they're loading too much work on you, and can I please just complete one task at a time?
I've always known I'm different, at a young age there were noises I just couldn't stand.
And jobs, just one at a time, but my observation skills are another level (many car dealers describing my eye)
I've wondered whether a diag would be needed?
I haven't bothered as I function 95% ok
But I do wear my hidden disability lanyard when on cruise boats, and on public transport (explains me having to wear earphone sometimes)
So I'll follow your thread with much interest.
First thing I'd do with work is tell them they're loading too much work on you, and can I please just complete one task at a time?
Noises, yes! We have a "work on campus" initiative at the moment, so I end up in an open plan office wearing noise cancelling headphones for most of the day.
Open plan offices are a bugbear... It's a big room full of scientists and engineers, professions that do attract more than their fair share of the 'tism, with some accountants sprinkled in (generally within shouting distance of the spectrum). So we have people who cannot control the modulation of their voice and often have idiosyncratic behaviour and movements, sharing the same space as people who are distracted more easily than a dog in a room full of squirrels. Then we want them to concentrate. What knobhead thought open plan was a good idea?
COVID was a godsend so far as that was concerned. I can work in a silent office, tucked away at the back of the house, by myself. I lose focus? I can go away and come back later.
Open plan offices are a bugbear... It's a big room full of scientists and engineers, professions that do attract more than their fair share of the 'tism, with some accountants sprinkled in (generally within shouting distance of the spectrum). So we have people who cannot control the modulation of their voice and often have idiosyncratic behaviour and movements, sharing the same space as people who are distracted more easily than a dog in a room full of squirrels. Then we want them to concentrate. What knobhead thought open plan was a good idea?
COVID was a godsend so far as that was concerned. I can work in a silent office, tucked away at the back of the house, by myself. I lose focus? I can go away and come back later.
OP- i could have written that post word for word.
I’ve thought for a while now that I was probably somewhat autistic- when my son was younger a few people said he does things in a bit of an autistic way way. I thought oh I do that too- as does my dad. So it probably runs in the family.
2 years ago I got promoted to run the design team I was in, resulting in me having to jump between tasks constantly, deal with conflicting priorities and manage people. Previously I had big long solo design projects I could just immerse myself in.
As a result my mental state had become really low, wasn’t coping at work, my wife was at her wits end as I was just becoming burnt out. Finally gave in and had some therapy sessions which have been really useful- finally realised that it’s not that I’m useless it’s just my brain isn’t wired in the right way to do that job.
I have since handed in my notice so I can go back to the design job I loved. Bit of a gamble financially but I’m so much happier and can’t wait for the next step in my career.
I’m glad to have had the opportunity to lead the team- it was always the “end goal”- but now I’ve done it I know it’s not where my strengths lie. For me, happiness and job satisfaction outweighs the extra salary.
Bit cheesy but I like this cartoon:
I’ve thought for a while now that I was probably somewhat autistic- when my son was younger a few people said he does things in a bit of an autistic way way. I thought oh I do that too- as does my dad. So it probably runs in the family.
2 years ago I got promoted to run the design team I was in, resulting in me having to jump between tasks constantly, deal with conflicting priorities and manage people. Previously I had big long solo design projects I could just immerse myself in.
As a result my mental state had become really low, wasn’t coping at work, my wife was at her wits end as I was just becoming burnt out. Finally gave in and had some therapy sessions which have been really useful- finally realised that it’s not that I’m useless it’s just my brain isn’t wired in the right way to do that job.
I have since handed in my notice so I can go back to the design job I loved. Bit of a gamble financially but I’m so much happier and can’t wait for the next step in my career.
I’m glad to have had the opportunity to lead the team- it was always the “end goal”- but now I’ve done it I know it’s not where my strengths lie. For me, happiness and job satisfaction outweighs the extra salary.
Bit cheesy but I like this cartoon:
donkmeister said:
However... Recently my brain's workings have been causing me real problems at work. I need focus time. I cannot flick from task to task. Recently my job has evolved (without me being part of the decision) into one where I am expected to flick between tasks ad hoc, on the whims of four different bosses, each with their own sense of priorities. The result is that instead of having focused time to work on each problem (somewhat sequentially) I am expected to switch in and out of tasks with abandon.
My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
[...]
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
I have no expertise regarding ASD (other than managing people who are on the spectrum) but it seems to be that, whether or not you are on the spectrum, the core problem here is that you're being forced to context-switch too frequently, and that is negatively impacting your productivity (and, presumably, causing you stress). My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
[...]
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
In an ideal world, you would have a one person setting your priorities (instead of four different people constantly trying to get you to prioritise whatever they want you to do) - i.e. a single manager who would field work requests from the four different bosses, decide how they should be prioritised, and act as a buffer to protect you from their pressure.
If that sounds like a good solution, the key question is: How do you get there?
Edited by MadCaptainJack on Friday 2nd October 18:19
Is this a situation where, as some YouTubers would say, 'you need to learn to say No'?
i.e. in the absence of a single manager above you upon whom you can rely to support your preferred (and indeed most productive) working practices, you effectively need to become that manager yourself and set down how you are working and how others' work requests will be dealt with within that framework / operational practices.
'I can do that, but it will need several hours of focused time and I don't have a suitable block of time/capacity until Wednesday PM.'
'This cannot be done in the timescale you request unless all other work is paused, and doing so would have unacceptable knock-on impacts on person X and Y and project Z.'
'I can reprioritise the other work you have requested so that I can get this urgent task done, but it will cause delays of X days to that other project.'
All easier typed on the internet than said and done in the real world, of course...
It seems anecdotally to be the case that those most valued / most highly paid, are those that are good at their job, know they are good at their job, and who set the 'terms of engagement' with others who are paying for their services.
Or at least that is my perception of the PBPH Directors
i.e. in the absence of a single manager above you upon whom you can rely to support your preferred (and indeed most productive) working practices, you effectively need to become that manager yourself and set down how you are working and how others' work requests will be dealt with within that framework / operational practices.
'I can do that, but it will need several hours of focused time and I don't have a suitable block of time/capacity until Wednesday PM.'
'This cannot be done in the timescale you request unless all other work is paused, and doing so would have unacceptable knock-on impacts on person X and Y and project Z.'
'I can reprioritise the other work you have requested so that I can get this urgent task done, but it will cause delays of X days to that other project.'
All easier typed on the internet than said and done in the real world, of course...
It seems anecdotally to be the case that those most valued / most highly paid, are those that are good at their job, know they are good at their job, and who set the 'terms of engagement' with others who are paying for their services.
Or at least that is my perception of the PBPH Directors
Edited by RSTurboPaul on Friday 2nd October 18:42
It may assist certainly in respect of should there be any adjustments you might need to your working environment, for example if there are "performance" issues that arise perhaps from Time Blindness or communications which some may see as rude (apologies for making assumptions I do not know your symptoms but just given random examples, others do apply).
It will or should put your employer on notice of a requirement to investigate
It will or should put your employer on notice of a requirement to investigate
donkmeister said:
TLDR: does a diagnosis of ASD, in your 40s, actually have any benefit? Specifically, when it comes to the workplace and finding a way to get the best out of you whilst not feeling like your brain is going through a mincer?
The long version:
I am in my 40s. I have, since childhood, had what would be termed "autistic tendencies" and participate in what I now know to be called "masking". Nothing too debilitating, if I am on the spectrum then I'm high functioning. As two of my nephews are profoundly autistic I have some appreciation that the struggles I face are orders of magnitude less than those of people who are far down the other end of the spectrum.
It's never been something I've felt much need to investigate until the last two years. My daughter exhibits similar traits, and I see her struggling with some of the same matters of "understanding people" and "the world isn't as it should be" that I have always struggled with. My mind turns to how I can prepare her for a world that is frankly disorganised and stupid, and what tools I can equip her with to reduce stress and anxiety along the way.
However... Recently my brain's workings have been causing me real problems at work. I need focus time. I cannot flick from task to task. Recently my job has evolved (without me being part of the decision) into one where I am expected to flick between tasks ad hoc, on the whims of four different bosses, each with their own sense of priorities. The result is that instead of having focused time to work on each problem (somewhat sequentially) I am expected to switch in and out of tasks with abandon.
My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
I wonder if seeking out some assessment of neurological differences might help. A piece of paper to point to that means my employer will take note that they need to let me focus, or we need to spread the work across more people instead of me trying to spin plates. Or, they'll need to explain that adjustments can't be made and I need to look for a new appointment. Which would be a shame because I quite liked the job and the people before.
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
I should say the issue is not one of mental capability; a physical analogue would be starting off by asking Geoff Capes to lift a 50lb barbell, but then ask him to suddenly put that one down and lift this other one over here. No, not that one, this one. Why are you lifting that one Geoff? I already told you I wanted THAT barbell lifted by the end of the week and you're lifting that other guy's barbells. Come on Geoff, can't you lift a 50lb barbell?! Geoff Capes could lift that barbell with one finger, but he couldn't switch between several different barbells like that.
Now... when I was 5, following some observations by my school about some behaviours, I was assessed for something. I remember having to play with toys and talk to some adults while my mum had to sit off to the side. My parents spoke of it a few times, but never said anything of any conclusions drawn and I never thought to ask. Unfortunately my mum died a few years ago and my dad has a swiss cheese brain, so I'll never know.
There's a reason the saying "no dog can serve two masters" exists. I don't think this is about you, I think this is about your work place having put in place a structure where you need to serve 4 competing demands and I think in this scenario anyone would struggle. Your bosses are delegating their combined prioritisation to you, and they need to sort themselves out. The long version:
I am in my 40s. I have, since childhood, had what would be termed "autistic tendencies" and participate in what I now know to be called "masking". Nothing too debilitating, if I am on the spectrum then I'm high functioning. As two of my nephews are profoundly autistic I have some appreciation that the struggles I face are orders of magnitude less than those of people who are far down the other end of the spectrum.
It's never been something I've felt much need to investigate until the last two years. My daughter exhibits similar traits, and I see her struggling with some of the same matters of "understanding people" and "the world isn't as it should be" that I have always struggled with. My mind turns to how I can prepare her for a world that is frankly disorganised and stupid, and what tools I can equip her with to reduce stress and anxiety along the way.
However... Recently my brain's workings have been causing me real problems at work. I need focus time. I cannot flick from task to task. Recently my job has evolved (without me being part of the decision) into one where I am expected to flick between tasks ad hoc, on the whims of four different bosses, each with their own sense of priorities. The result is that instead of having focused time to work on each problem (somewhat sequentially) I am expected to switch in and out of tasks with abandon.
My brain clearly cannot cope with that and all I end up doing is spiralling and achieving next to nothing. The response from management is to pile on more pressure, thinking that will somehow push the work out of me. When all I need is time to focus and finish task A before I think about task B. If I dip in and out of tasks then nothing happens.
I wonder if seeking out some assessment of neurological differences might help. A piece of paper to point to that means my employer will take note that they need to let me focus, or we need to spread the work across more people instead of me trying to spin plates. Or, they'll need to explain that adjustments can't be made and I need to look for a new appointment. Which would be a shame because I quite liked the job and the people before.
For some context, my job is in STEM, the job involves problem solving, mathematical modelling, sometimes coming up with new solutions to problems.
I should say the issue is not one of mental capability; a physical analogue would be starting off by asking Geoff Capes to lift a 50lb barbell, but then ask him to suddenly put that one down and lift this other one over here. No, not that one, this one. Why are you lifting that one Geoff? I already told you I wanted THAT barbell lifted by the end of the week and you're lifting that other guy's barbells. Come on Geoff, can't you lift a 50lb barbell?! Geoff Capes could lift that barbell with one finger, but he couldn't switch between several different barbells like that.
Now... when I was 5, following some observations by my school about some behaviours, I was assessed for something. I remember having to play with toys and talk to some adults while my mum had to sit off to the side. My parents spoke of it a few times, but never said anything of any conclusions drawn and I never thought to ask. Unfortunately my mum died a few years ago and my dad has a swiss cheese brain, so I'll never know.
Can I suggest that you say to demand 2 or 3 that "demand 1 requires I deliver for Boss A output b by time c. Doing output x for you by time y means b will be delayed beyond c. Please can you confirm with Boss A that is acceptable to them as that is not my decision to make?"
I have the same problem.
Sometimes it feels like I'm a brain surgeon at a critical point and someone interrupts me to do some urgent open-heart surgery.
Yes, I could do both but at least one of those patients is now going to die.
I need transition time.
Still not sure what getting a diagnosis actually achieves. I have thought about it.
I don't want to be on medication
I don't want a label
I don't want special treatment
Just tell me exactly what you want and when you want it and then back off.
Sometimes it feels like I'm a brain surgeon at a critical point and someone interrupts me to do some urgent open-heart surgery.
Yes, I could do both but at least one of those patients is now going to die.
I need transition time.
Still not sure what getting a diagnosis actually achieves. I have thought about it.
I don't want to be on medication
I don't want a label
I don't want special treatment
Just tell me exactly what you want and when you want it and then back off.
Thank you all, there's a lot of useful food for thought.
Yesterday was a particularly low day; I was within 30 minutes of finishing a long, high value project for Boss A when Boss B suddenly started harassing me (I don't think that was his intention) on why a follow-on project hadn't been finished. Cue an hour of back and forth followed by trying to get back in to the first project. By the end of the day I managed to finish the first project but wasted a few hours that I had been planning to spend on Boss B's project.
I think that many of you are correct in pointing out that four bosses doesn't really work. I've tried to sort that with a weekly catch-up where they all seem what I'm working on and have a say on the priorities. I need to start reporting on "and here's the unplanned stuff you asked me to take a look at too".
My thinking about a diagnosis isn't because I want special treatment, it's because I want some official acknowledgement of "Donk's brain doesn't work like you might expect. To get the best out of him he needs to have some flow control, and time to focus on tasks". It's in my interest (lower stress and anxiety) and their interest (they get more work out of me because I spend less time spiralling and more time in a tunnel).
I've tried to have that discussion before, but it gets forgotten quite quickly. I think if I sat there talking like Rainman and contorting my hands they'd take note, but because I don't, they seem to think "oh, he's just saying that. I can work like this, and he's way smarter than me so it should be a piece of piss for him".
The analogy in my head is that my brain is optimised for certain thought processes, to the detriment of others!
What I absolutely will not do is make "I am autistic" my personality!
Yesterday was a particularly low day; I was within 30 minutes of finishing a long, high value project for Boss A when Boss B suddenly started harassing me (I don't think that was his intention) on why a follow-on project hadn't been finished. Cue an hour of back and forth followed by trying to get back in to the first project. By the end of the day I managed to finish the first project but wasted a few hours that I had been planning to spend on Boss B's project.
I think that many of you are correct in pointing out that four bosses doesn't really work. I've tried to sort that with a weekly catch-up where they all seem what I'm working on and have a say on the priorities. I need to start reporting on "and here's the unplanned stuff you asked me to take a look at too".
My thinking about a diagnosis isn't because I want special treatment, it's because I want some official acknowledgement of "Donk's brain doesn't work like you might expect. To get the best out of him he needs to have some flow control, and time to focus on tasks". It's in my interest (lower stress and anxiety) and their interest (they get more work out of me because I spend less time spiralling and more time in a tunnel).
I've tried to have that discussion before, but it gets forgotten quite quickly. I think if I sat there talking like Rainman and contorting my hands they'd take note, but because I don't, they seem to think "oh, he's just saying that. I can work like this, and he's way smarter than me so it should be a piece of piss for him".
The analogy in my head is that my brain is optimised for certain thought processes, to the detriment of others!
What I absolutely will not do is make "I am autistic" my personality!
Agent57 said:
I have the same problem.
Sometimes it feels like I'm a brain surgeon at a critical point and someone interrupts me to do some urgent open-heart surgery.
Yes, I could do both but at least one of those patients is now going to die.
I need transition time.
Still not sure what getting a diagnosis actually achieves. I have thought about it.
I don't want to be on medication
I don't want a label
I don't want special treatment
Just tell me exactly what you want and when you want it and then back off.
When they're working in good faith I think it's because their brain works differently from yours and mine. Sometimes it feels like I'm a brain surgeon at a critical point and someone interrupts me to do some urgent open-heart surgery.
Yes, I could do both but at least one of those patients is now going to die.
I need transition time.
Still not sure what getting a diagnosis actually achieves. I have thought about it.
I don't want to be on medication
I don't want a label
I don't want special treatment
Just tell me exactly what you want and when you want it and then back off.
It's bloody frustrating and stress inducing though isn't it?.
I sympathise, OP.
My brain works similarly, albeit while I have some auty tendencies I've never felt it got in my way too much.
I have always been able to immerse myself in a project or task and produce exceptional work and new understanding, and my bosses appreciate that. But until a few years ago they did struggle mightily with my inability to pivot to another thing.
Office full of engineers, and the managers are the ones who are best able to juggle ten balls at once (i.e. five engineers' tasks plus all the external inputs) but they can't grasp that the reason they're managers is cos they can do that, and they should recognise their team's strengths which are different to their own. But that doesn't tend to happen does it? I can do X therefore I expect you to be able to. Doesn't help that they're basically engineers too, who want a company car and haven't had much management training...
What happened with me is a series of brain injuries, from my mid teens to my 40s. Repeat concussions, migraines, brain fog, terrible memory, blah blah. I ended up with a diagnosis from a brain injury unit explaining my brain's lack of plasticity and my tendency to tire quickly in cases of disruption, external noises, flip flopping, recollection, talking with sub clauses.
However handing that doctor's letter to my manager didn't help, in the round. They didn't know what to do with me. Recommended "writing things down" to help with my poor short term memory and that would sort it. There, job done, we've made reasonable adjustments. Now as that's not really working we'll put you in a corner, ask you to do some grad level stuff, and with a bit of luck maybe you'll f
k off.
I struggled with work for a bit then handed them the full medical report, to try to help them understand the issues. The single and only thing in that report that helped was that they'd done an IQ test and calculated my loss of IQ due to the brain injuries - and both the before and after numbers were pretty high. Then they decided maybe I wasn't a vegetable after all, had a bit of nouse left, and we - well, mostly I, with some pressure removed by them to give me the headspace to recognise my good and bad points) managed to work out how to get the best out of me (which incidentally proves to be very valuable, and most of my managers recognise I make leaps and connections where no one else would, so they keep me and feed me and let me out occasionally).
Then as managers go and new ones come in, and you either go round the mulberry bush again with them, or stay quiet and work the way you know works, and deal with any issues they have with you as they arise.
I'll be honest, in hindsight I'd rather have worked out my strengths, weaknesses, rewards, triggers, environmental factors and bear traps on my own, and gone to my senior leadership with a proposal to get the best out of me.
So in my experience going to management with a diagnosis saying you're not like everyone else is hard on those managers. They don't get it, they're not medical professionals, they're not you and you need to be a great communicator to get them to understand you, they don't really want to hear it or deal with it but they know they have to, they'd far rather you tell them the answer rather than ask them the question, and in summary they usually aren't terribly well placed to deal with the st you've just curled out on their desk.
TL;DR: Don't curl one out, go to them with a plan that you know will work for you, and execute it.
My brain works similarly, albeit while I have some auty tendencies I've never felt it got in my way too much.
I have always been able to immerse myself in a project or task and produce exceptional work and new understanding, and my bosses appreciate that. But until a few years ago they did struggle mightily with my inability to pivot to another thing.
Office full of engineers, and the managers are the ones who are best able to juggle ten balls at once (i.e. five engineers' tasks plus all the external inputs) but they can't grasp that the reason they're managers is cos they can do that, and they should recognise their team's strengths which are different to their own. But that doesn't tend to happen does it? I can do X therefore I expect you to be able to. Doesn't help that they're basically engineers too, who want a company car and haven't had much management training...
What happened with me is a series of brain injuries, from my mid teens to my 40s. Repeat concussions, migraines, brain fog, terrible memory, blah blah. I ended up with a diagnosis from a brain injury unit explaining my brain's lack of plasticity and my tendency to tire quickly in cases of disruption, external noises, flip flopping, recollection, talking with sub clauses.
However handing that doctor's letter to my manager didn't help, in the round. They didn't know what to do with me. Recommended "writing things down" to help with my poor short term memory and that would sort it. There, job done, we've made reasonable adjustments. Now as that's not really working we'll put you in a corner, ask you to do some grad level stuff, and with a bit of luck maybe you'll f
k off.I struggled with work for a bit then handed them the full medical report, to try to help them understand the issues. The single and only thing in that report that helped was that they'd done an IQ test and calculated my loss of IQ due to the brain injuries - and both the before and after numbers were pretty high. Then they decided maybe I wasn't a vegetable after all, had a bit of nouse left, and we - well, mostly I, with some pressure removed by them to give me the headspace to recognise my good and bad points) managed to work out how to get the best out of me (which incidentally proves to be very valuable, and most of my managers recognise I make leaps and connections where no one else would, so they keep me and feed me and let me out occasionally).
Then as managers go and new ones come in, and you either go round the mulberry bush again with them, or stay quiet and work the way you know works, and deal with any issues they have with you as they arise.
I'll be honest, in hindsight I'd rather have worked out my strengths, weaknesses, rewards, triggers, environmental factors and bear traps on my own, and gone to my senior leadership with a proposal to get the best out of me.
So in my experience going to management with a diagnosis saying you're not like everyone else is hard on those managers. They don't get it, they're not medical professionals, they're not you and you need to be a great communicator to get them to understand you, they don't really want to hear it or deal with it but they know they have to, they'd far rather you tell them the answer rather than ask them the question, and in summary they usually aren't terribly well placed to deal with the s
t you've just curled out on their desk. TL;DR: Don't curl one out, go to them with a plan that you know will work for you, and execute it.
Oh and working for multiple managers is hard enough for anyone, let alone someone with brain wiring that's different.
I don't think people who aren't in that situation really understand how hard it can be - especially for someone with a preference of getting their head down and on with a good bit of work rather than networking with a load of managers and stakeholders.
If there's the slightest chance of working under one manager, try and angle for that. You're not doing yourself any favours if you're juggling 4 sets of demands, expectations, working conditions and report outs before you even start the day's work.
I don't think people who aren't in that situation really understand how hard it can be - especially for someone with a preference of getting their head down and on with a good bit of work rather than networking with a load of managers and stakeholders.
If there's the slightest chance of working under one manager, try and angle for that. You're not doing yourself any favours if you're juggling 4 sets of demands, expectations, working conditions and report outs before you even start the day's work.
White knuckling neurodiversity in the workplace is hard work and you'll end up thouroughly burnt out if you can't change things - you don't actually need a formal diagnosis to request reasonable adjustments under the equality act. But before quoting the law to your boss(es), perhaps there's someone in leadership you can speak to and say 'I'm feeling this way, it's making work hard for me, can we do something to fix it?'.
An autism diagnosis is expensive and it's not like you can do much with it other than just know (and you already know anyway). You are the way you are, try to understand what's triggering and try to find things that help
An autism diagnosis is expensive and it's not like you can do much with it other than just know (and you already know anyway). You are the way you are, try to understand what's triggering and try to find things that help
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