What Does BMW Stand For?

[Mr Gaga]

Well after a few days own owning and driving a 2005 535d Touring Sport M, I can only say;

Brings Many Worries

Just before I purchased it the car (during the test drive) it went BONG! Suspension Failed

The owner spent over £1000 on a new compresser and a few other bits. Great I thought, 2 year warranty on parts!

Driving around yesterday (day two of ownership), BONG! Tyre Pressure Loss

BONG! Driving Lamp Failed

BONG! Water (washer bottle) low

BONG! Low fuel warning

I'm sorry, I can read the fuel computer, I can sense a flat tyre (all it took was one short squirt on the pump for the correct tyre pressure at the petrol station to loose the warning message), I can add water when the bottle runs dry and I assume in most cases I can replace a bulb when it is gone...

I know cars are getting more inteligent but do modern car owners drive around thinking "what next"?

It's a fine car, but not for me...

Edited by Mr Gaga on Tuesday 30th November 19:03

Edited by Mr Gaga on Wednesday 1st December 14:50

[GestapoWatch]

I definitely get the 'when is it going to ding at me and how much for?' feeling when driving - like a cash register

Love 'em to pieces though

[The Wookie]

The prevalence of blowouts, people walking along the hard shoulder with cans of petrol, people driving around with filthy windscreens and wipers flailing fruitlessly, and people driving around with one headlight would suggest that you're in the minority

[Groober]

I thought BMW stood for something entirely different.

[mmm-five]

Mr Gaga said:

I'm sorry, I can read the fuel computer, I can sense a flat tyre (all it took was one bar pump up at the petrol station to loose the warning message), I can add water when the bottle runs dry and I assume in most cases I can replace a bulb when it is gone...

It's a fine car, but not for me...

I'd argue that it sounds like the perfect car for an inattentive owner like you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Tyre Pressure Loss

You obviously didn't notice the huge 1 bar pressure loss and had to be reminded by the OBC's bong

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Driving Lamp Failed

You didn't notice you had a light out and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Water (washer bottle) Empty

You haven't been checking your levels and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Low fuel warning

You didn't see the low level of fuel and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Edited by mmm-five on Tuesday 30th November 14:16

[The GMan]

I don't see what the issue is!?

I drive over 700 miles a week in my 05 645ci and some of the reminders are really useful. I would rather know whats going on than not. I can check my car before a long journey but like to know if things change while on the journey.

Edited by The GMan on Tuesday 30th November 14:41

[Jobbo]

Has it been constantly below 3 degrees C so you aren't always getting the ice warning as well?

[STW2010]

mmm-five said:

Mr Gaga said:

I'm sorry, I can read the fuel computer, I can sense a flat tyre (all it took was one bar pump up at the petrol station to loose the warning message), I can add water when the bottle runs dry and I assume in most cases I can replace a bulb when it is gone...

It's a fine car, but not for me...

I'd argue that it sounds like the perfect car for an inattentive owner like you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Tyre Pressure Loss

You obviously didn't notice the huge 1 bar pressure loss and had to be reminded by the OBC's bong

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Driving Lamp Failed

You didn't notice you had a light out and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Water (washer bottle) Empty

You haven't been checking your levels and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Low fuel warning

You didn't see the low level of fuel and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Edited by mmm-five on Tuesday 30th November 14:16

Completely agree. I can't understand why this car isn't for you- you will need to fill up the fuel tank in any car! Personally I find it useful to be warned when the fuel or washer bottles are nearing emptiness.

In an owners club I was a member of there was one member that decided it wasn't the car for him because the windows steamed up when it rained (hardly unique to that car!). So traded the car in a month after buying it- taking a hit of a few grand for the pleasure of doing so.

Edited by STW2010 on Tuesday 30th November 14:35

[ZOLLAR]

Bayerische Motoren Werke... oh wait thats not what you meant was it? sorry.

[aka_kerrly]

The Wookie said:

The prevalence of blowouts, people walking along the hard shoulder with cans of petrol, people driving around with filthy windscreens and wipers flailing fruitlessly, and people driving around with one headlight would suggest that you're in the minority

Exactly what I was going to say.

Unfortunately car manufactures have to put these stupid warnings on to protect themselves from idiots who fail to maintain a car and then try to sue when it goes wrong.

My car has a warning beep to tell me the seat belts are off when the engine is running, you may think that is reasonable because people can forget etc, its bloody annoying when you have auto electric seatbelts so i have no choice if i wear it or not.

[STW2010]

aka_kerrly said:

The Wookie said:

The prevalence of blowouts, people walking along the hard shoulder with cans of petrol, people driving around with filthy windscreens and wipers flailing fruitlessly, and people driving around with one headlight would suggest that you're in the minority

Exactly what I was going to say.

Unfortunately car manufactures have to put these stupid warnings on to protect themselves from idiots who fail to maintain a car and then try to sue when it goes wrong.

My car has a warning beep to tell me the seat belts are off when the engine is running, you may think that is reasonable because people can forget etc, its bloody annoying when you have auto electric seatbelts so i have no choice if i wear it or not.

I drive a BMW and the seatbelt warning light doesn't seem to work for the driver's seat. Clearly there is a fault, or the previous owner also got fed up with it and disconnected it. I reckon the latter

[fatboy b]

Isn't one bar like 14 PSI? That's quite a bit

[Mr Gaga]

Jobbo said:

Has it been constantly below 3 degrees C so you aren't always getting the ice warning as well?

Ha ha, yes I knew there was another one.

[STW2010]

Mr Gaga said:

Jobbo said:

Has it been constantly below 3 degrees C so you aren't always getting the ice warning as well?

Ha ha, yes I knew there was another one.

I must admit that I find this warning quite annoying too

[Mr E Driver]

British Military Watches














whaddaya mean it's the wrong thread?

[MGZRod]

At primary school it was Black Mans Willy


Oh how we laughed.

[Mr Gaga]

mmm-five said:

Mr Gaga said:

I'm sorry, I can read the fuel computer, I can sense a flat tyre (all it took was one bar pump up at the petrol station to loose the warning message), I can add water when the bottle runs dry and I assume in most cases I can replace a bulb when it is gone...

It's a fine car, but not for me...

I'd argue that it sounds like the perfect car for an inattentive owner like you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Tyre Pressure Loss

You obviously didn't notice the huge 1 bar pressure loss and had to be reminded by the OBC's bong

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Driving Lamp Failed

You didn't notice you had a light out and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Water (washer bottle) Empty

You haven't been checking your levels and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Low fuel warning

You didn't see the low level of fuel and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Edited by mmm-five on Tuesday 30th November 14:16

In response, I guess the tyre pressure had just dropped below the systems level whilst driving yesterday, no the bulb also went during a the journey so it was not seen but I would have noticed (actually), the washers had not fully run out (I was on the way to a garage when they had).

As I have decided to sell the car the fuel computer had (I think 75 miles to go).

A mate had said he'd have the car off me immediately and I was happy...

Bye bye the best car in the real world! A nice tidy profit for me and no more BONGS! lol

Edited by Mr Gaga on Tuesday 30th November 20:03

[soad]

ZOLLAR said:

Bayerische Motoren Werke... oh wait thats not what you meant was it? sorry.

Bavarian Motor Works

[Dr Doofenshmirtz]

Black Man's Willy?

Doh - beaten to it

Edited by Dr Doofenshmirtz on Tuesday 30th November 16:41

[joebongo]

Mr Gaga said:

mmm-five said:

Mr Gaga said:

I'm sorry, I can read the fuel computer, I can sense a flat tyre (all it took was one bar pump up at the petrol station to loose the warning message), I can add water when the bottle runs dry and I assume in most cases I can replace a bulb when it is gone...

It's a fine car, but not for me...

I'd argue that it sounds like the perfect car for an inattentive owner like you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Tyre Pressure Loss

You obviously didn't notice the huge 1 bar pressure loss and had to be reminded by the OBC's bong

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Driving Lamp Failed

You didn't notice you had a light out and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Water (washer bottle) Empty

You haven't been checking your levels and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Mr Gaga said:

BONG! Low fuel warning

You didn't see the low level of fuel and had to wait for the bong to tell you

Edited by mmm-five on Tuesday 30th November 14:16

In response, I guess the tyre pressure had just drpped below the systems level whilst driving yesterday, no the bulb also went during a the journey so it was not seen but I would have noticed (actually), the washers had not fully run out (I was on the way to a garage when they had).

As I have decided to sell the car the fuel computer had (I think 75 miles to go).

A mate had said he'd have the car off me immediately and I was happy...

Bye bye the best car in the real world! A nice tidy profit for me and no more BONGS! lol

Doesn't sound very matey!