Discussion
I placed this on a Renault forum last night.
I have a bunch of kids jumping on my privet hedge at night,they are between 8 and 14, Should I go outside and tell them to stop it and then become a target for them, or just ignore them? The police wont do anythink cos they are too young. Wot would you do?
Among the many replies, I received this gem
Employ Mathew Kelly as your hedge trimmer I here he is looking for work at the moment!
I have a bunch of kids jumping on my privet hedge at night,they are between 8 and 14, Should I go outside and tell them to stop it and then become a target for them, or just ignore them? The police wont do anythink cos they are too young. Wot would you do?
Among the many replies, I received this gem
Employ Mathew Kelly as your hedge trimmer I here he is looking for work at the moment!
The way I see it, you've got three choices:
1) Do nothing because you're scared of a bunch of kids;
2) Follow one of them home and kick the pi$$ out of his dad; or
3) Run outside with your camera and tell them that you're going to post photos of them on your "webring" for all your 'contacts' to see.
1) Do nothing because you're scared of a bunch of kids;
2) Follow one of them home and kick the pi$$ out of his dad; or
3) Run outside with your camera and tell them that you're going to post photos of them on your "webring" for all your 'contacts' to see.
I'm tempted to say support the hedge with a study set of iron railings.. With spikes on the top.
Raises an interesting question. If you were to do that now, or something similar, after they have been wrecking the hedge, I'm willing to bet you could be sued.
What about had it been there before and one of the little darlings jumped on the hedge and got kebabed?
Raises an interesting question. If you were to do that now, or something similar, after they have been wrecking the hedge, I'm willing to bet you could be sued.
What about had it been there before and one of the little darlings jumped on the hedge and got kebabed?
Psychobert said:
Find a local chicken farm, bound to want to get rid of a few feathers.. Now all you need is some sort of trip switch and a feather dispensing device..
No, no, no. What a ridiculous waste of time and energy.
A gaurenteed cure, not that I've tried it you understand.
When you go to the chicken farm ask him for five tonnes of poo and use this to, ahem.., fertilize the hedge. Will also upset neighbour accross the road.
Kids will be kids but repetive antisocial sh1t of this nature is quite out of order.
Obviously, the ineffectual apologist mob who perpetually excuse such blatent crap should be shot but failing that and the perilous position the honest subject finds themselves in, a la Tony Martin, should they extract a bit of the old 'Lee Kersey' themselves(Death Wish, anyone?), necessitates a different line of thought.
One possibility is the banding together of neighbours to employ a security company. What I would like to see is a sort of ring fencing perimeter, guarded by a sentry who simply doesn't let uninvited personnel through.
CID always reckon the overwhleming majority of domestic burglaries and related infringements are the results of opportunism; this would reduce that dramatically.
Obviously, the ineffectual apologist mob who perpetually excuse such blatent crap should be shot but failing that and the perilous position the honest subject finds themselves in, a la Tony Martin, should they extract a bit of the old 'Lee Kersey' themselves(Death Wish, anyone?), necessitates a different line of thought.
One possibility is the banding together of neighbours to employ a security company. What I would like to see is a sort of ring fencing perimeter, guarded by a sentry who simply doesn't let uninvited personnel through.
CID always reckon the overwhleming majority of domestic burglaries and related infringements are the results of opportunism; this would reduce that dramatically.
My father had the pleasure of putting up the company christmas tree (over 30ft outdoors) and had the problem of the little scrotes from the council estate opposite nicking the lower hanging lights, he solved the problem in the same way, coating the bottom 2-3ft of the tree in the old oil from the gearboxes of the forklifts
inmate said: I prefer to be more subtle, Today I be painting my hedge with old engine oil.
I have the same type of problem
I live very near an open space with swings etc, it has a number of footpaths that I use to walk to the local station.
Invariable there are 12-15 year olds hanging round the swings - doing a bit of weed or drinking zider.
As I am routinely in a pin striper and carrying a brief case - I always attract the under the breath comments such as W*anker or Lurker (the local term for a pervert) or such like
There is rarely a solution as ultimately I am not going to hit a minor, and they know that so will carry on.
However I have confronted them in the past - there is no reason to be scared of kids.
Generally a polite word will sort it out - but if they think they can get a rise out of you they will keep pushing....
I live very near an open space with swings etc, it has a number of footpaths that I use to walk to the local station.
Invariable there are 12-15 year olds hanging round the swings - doing a bit of weed or drinking zider.
As I am routinely in a pin striper and carrying a brief case - I always attract the under the breath comments such as W*anker or Lurker (the local term for a pervert) or such like
There is rarely a solution as ultimately I am not going to hit a minor, and they know that so will carry on.
However I have confronted them in the past - there is no reason to be scared of kids.
Generally a polite word will sort it out - but if they think they can get a rise out of you they will keep pushing....
Obtain a catapult. A good one.
Shoot the bastards from somewhere other than your property/house so they'll think it was someone else.
Give them a good yelling at first though. Its only fair you give them a warning before you attempt to shoot the wee bastards.
My favourite trick is to approach them at warp speed carrying a big heavy stick with a look of pure evil on my face yelling like a loon. The more noise the better.
Most kids run like fcuk.
Of course you can't actually hit the wee so and sos but they don't know that and if you can perfect the mad escaped murderer look then most won't stand around to find out whether or not you really are going to hit them.
Andy
Shoot the bastards from somewhere other than your property/house so they'll think it was someone else.
Give them a good yelling at first though. Its only fair you give them a warning before you attempt to shoot the wee bastards.
My favourite trick is to approach them at warp speed carrying a big heavy stick with a look of pure evil on my face yelling like a loon. The more noise the better.
Most kids run like fcuk.
Of course you can't actually hit the wee so and sos but they don't know that and if you can perfect the mad escaped murderer look then most won't stand around to find out whether or not you really are going to hit them.
Andy
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