Jeremy C the case for the prosecution.
Discussion
Keep up will you, oh lizard-features.
iguana said: Err what did I miss????
This thread prompted this one which in turn prompted these wild and unsubstantiated accusations from Messrs. Mel and CarZee.
I await with some pleasure their feeble sham of a prosecution.
jeremyc said:Keep up will you, oh lizard-features.
iguana said: Err what did I miss????
This thread prompted this one which in turn prompted these wild and unsubstantiated accusations from Messrs. Mel and CarZee.
I await with some pleasure their feeble sham of a prosecution.
It's definitely you, Jezza, admit it.
I always knew you had new man credentials - far too nice a chap to forget your wife's birthday and shag her sister on valentine's day.
PS You should call the star 'Morris Major' to go with her preferred method of transport. You know, like Ursa Minor and Ursa Major
>> Edited by domster on Friday 31st January 13:06
domster said:
jeremyc said:Keep up will you, oh lizard-features.
iguana said: Err what did I miss????
This thread prompted this one which in turn prompted these wild and unsubstantiated accusations from Messrs. Mel and CarZee.
I await with some pleasure their feeble sham of a prosecution.
It's definitely you, Jezza, admit it.
I always knew you had new man credentials - far too nice a chap to forget your wife's birthday and shag her sister on valentine's day.
Speaking from personal experience there Dom?
Matt.
It is immaterial; I am confident there is no way I will be found guilty.
Fer said: Jeremy, does that mean if you are found guilty you will have to go out and buy your SO a star anyway?
Anyway, what is there to say SWMBO doesn't already have a star named after her. Remember, the accusation is that I am nottelling, not that I am a soppy romantic git.
>> Edited by jeremyc on Friday 31st January 13:23
Right lets lay some ground rules while the prosecuting solicitor is down the pub.
The cast is as follows:
Bastard from the CPS who decided there was enough evidence to proceed - Mel
Prosecuting Solictor - Carzee QC
Defence Solictor - JeremyC (he's doomed he's doing his own defence
)
Clerk of the Courts - Madcop
Members of the Jury -
Mungo
SGirl
Domster
Plotloss
Incorrigible
ABBTVR
Podie
Danger Mouse
ErnestM (when he gets up
)
Don
Raceboy
Flasher
Pesiding Judge - The Rt Hon Chief Pie Eater Petrol Ted who will watch proceedings from far before imposing a suitable punishment WHEN you are found guilty by your peers.
The scene is set
Mr C are there any objections to the makeup of the Jury
The cast is as follows:
Bastard from the CPS who decided there was enough evidence to proceed - Mel
Prosecuting Solictor - Carzee QC
Defence Solictor - JeremyC (he's doomed he's doing his own defence
) Clerk of the Courts - Madcop
Members of the Jury -
Mungo
SGirl
Domster
Plotloss
Incorrigible
ABBTVR
Podie
Danger Mouse
ErnestM (when he gets up
) Don
Raceboy
Flasher
Pesiding Judge - The Rt Hon Chief Pie Eater Petrol Ted who will watch proceedings from far before imposing a suitable punishment WHEN you are found guilty by your peers.
The scene is set
Mr C are there any objections to the makeup of the Jury
mel said: Pesiding Judge - The Rt Hon Chief Pie Eater Petrol Ted who will watch proceedings from far before imposing a suitable punishment WHEN you are found guilty by your peers.
Shouldn't that be "before closing/deleting the thread when it all gets a bit out of hand"? It is Friday afternoon and all, things just wouldn't be the same round here without a Friday afternoon lockout...
I hope no-one objects to my makeup.
Okay.. the case for the prosecution.
Being that I'm unable to interactively cross examine the accused, I shall present the facts as they are and then the defence team will have an opportunity to explore our assertions, before their portestations are quashed and the accused is remanded pending sentencing.
The facts are as follows:
1) The pertinent enamourata is called Alison. There is more than one PHer that has a SWMBO called Alison, but all non-JeremyC Alisons have been eliminated from the enquiry.
2) Nottelling thought he could throw us a curveball by enquiring about the ins and outs of buying an S.
Jeremy's Alison clearly has an affection for classics, and could not be blamed for wanting to get in on the act of TVR ownership - hence an S, hence the enquiry.
3) Whilst 'keeping to a tight budget' was mentioned in the S enquiry, it should by no means be taken as read that Jeremy was intending to buy the S for Alison - merely that he was enquiring on her behalf. Or that he was merely trying to confuse the court.
4) Buying a star? I mean come on.. only someone who had an appreciation of marketing the intangible could possibly entertain such a notion. What's more intangible or unlikely (or damning?) than the profit to be made from polyphonic circuitry for mobile phones?
5) It's not Bonce. Even if he is a soppy twat.
The prosecution calls for a 4 hour adjournment while we go back to Basingstoke and get some pizza ordered and some wine opened..
I shall return.. :muahahaha:
>> Edited by CarZee (moderator) on Friday 31st January 14:10
Being that I'm unable to interactively cross examine the accused, I shall present the facts as they are and then the defence team will have an opportunity to explore our assertions, before their portestations are quashed and the accused is remanded pending sentencing.
The facts are as follows:
1) The pertinent enamourata is called Alison. There is more than one PHer that has a SWMBO called Alison, but all non-JeremyC Alisons have been eliminated from the enquiry.
2) Nottelling thought he could throw us a curveball by enquiring about the ins and outs of buying an S.
Jeremy's Alison clearly has an affection for classics, and could not be blamed for wanting to get in on the act of TVR ownership - hence an S, hence the enquiry.
3) Whilst 'keeping to a tight budget' was mentioned in the S enquiry, it should by no means be taken as read that Jeremy was intending to buy the S for Alison - merely that he was enquiring on her behalf. Or that he was merely trying to confuse the court.
4) Buying a star? I mean come on.. only someone who had an appreciation of marketing the intangible could possibly entertain such a notion. What's more intangible or unlikely (or damning?) than the profit to be made from polyphonic circuitry for mobile phones?
5) It's not Bonce. Even if he is a soppy twat.
The prosecution calls for a 4 hour adjournment while we go back to Basingstoke and get some pizza ordered and some wine opened..
I shall return.. :muahahaha:
>> Edited by CarZee (moderator) on Friday 31st January 14:10
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