Why can't people accept being in the wrong?
Discussion
In my driving lifetime (20 years) driving is also my day job, I often think i have seen most things you'd expect in some people's poor standard in driving, but what i notice now is peoples reactions to been pulled up on such thing is quite often shocking.
I was travelling down a main road in a 30 zone when i notice in my rear view mirror a Golf R sat up my bootlid, as we come to the roundabout i move off and he immediately sets off behind me, again glued to my rear when as we come to my turning off it has a small filter lane on the right, the guy in the Golf sees a taxi behind him about to use this filter lane to try and pass both of us, but instead he decides he is going to get what must have been millimeters off my rear just to stop this taxi getting in front of him.
About a mile further down the road as i come to turning left the guy in the Golf looks at me as he comes past and sees my displeasure by shaking my head, as well as raising my hand in a "what is wrong with you" way, in that moment i have never seen someone stop so quick and reverse on a busy main road to come chasing after me, as he comes flying up to the side of me with his window down absolutely raging, trying to justify sat up my rear because of the taxi driver earlier, telling me to get out of the car and how he'll smash my car up all whilst practically frothing at the mouth, I could be wrong but as he was doing all this he must have noticed i had a dashcam in and made sure he never went in front of me, presumably so as i didn't get his reg plate and threats on camera?
I'll readily admit that i should probably have just not looked at him or anything, but then once away it got me thinking why are people like this where they are willing to threaten someone and smash someone's car up simply because they can't accept that THEY are the ones in the wrong, I'd go as far as to say that i don't think this is just a driving issue but society in general?
I was travelling down a main road in a 30 zone when i notice in my rear view mirror a Golf R sat up my bootlid, as we come to the roundabout i move off and he immediately sets off behind me, again glued to my rear when as we come to my turning off it has a small filter lane on the right, the guy in the Golf sees a taxi behind him about to use this filter lane to try and pass both of us, but instead he decides he is going to get what must have been millimeters off my rear just to stop this taxi getting in front of him.
About a mile further down the road as i come to turning left the guy in the Golf looks at me as he comes past and sees my displeasure by shaking my head, as well as raising my hand in a "what is wrong with you" way, in that moment i have never seen someone stop so quick and reverse on a busy main road to come chasing after me, as he comes flying up to the side of me with his window down absolutely raging, trying to justify sat up my rear because of the taxi driver earlier, telling me to get out of the car and how he'll smash my car up all whilst practically frothing at the mouth, I could be wrong but as he was doing all this he must have noticed i had a dashcam in and made sure he never went in front of me, presumably so as i didn't get his reg plate and threats on camera?
I'll readily admit that i should probably have just not looked at him or anything, but then once away it got me thinking why are people like this where they are willing to threaten someone and smash someone's car up simply because they can't accept that THEY are the ones in the wrong, I'd go as far as to say that i don't think this is just a driving issue but society in general?
Sheepshanks said:
I always bear in mind that every year 25% of adults suffer a mental health episode.
This guy must have been part of that percentage then, because i have never seen someone rage as bad as this, I only hope 1 day whoever he is comes up against someone who would step out of the car and challenge him, I'm not powerfully built or intimidating to look at in any way either, so maybe that also gave him the confidence to go at me the way he did.I see enough of this watching YouTube and some dashcam clips, but when it happens to you it is enough to put me off driving at all because for me it's getting worse out there.
James_33 said:
This guy must have been part of that percentage then, because i have never seen someone rage as bad as this, I only hope 1 day whoever he is comes up against someone who would step out of the car and challenge him, I'm not powerfully built or intimidating to look at in any way either, so maybe that also gave him the confidence to go at me the way he did.
I see enough of this watching YouTube and some dashcam clips, but when it happens to you it is enough to put me off driving at all because for me it's getting worse out there.
I know you can't help yourself sometimes - I did a "WTF" the other day to a traffic cop who pulled across the road in front of me without warning - but you really shouldn't react to other drivers on the road. Look away from them, don't make eye contact. If their driving is agressive, they're hardly going to hold their hand up to say "sorry".I see enough of this watching YouTube and some dashcam clips, but when it happens to you it is enough to put me off driving at all because for me it's getting worse out there.
Sheepshanks said:
I know you can't help yourself sometimes - I did a "WTF" the other day to a traffic cop who pulled across the road in front of me without warning - but you really shouldn't react to other drivers on the road. Look away from them, don't make eye contact. If their driving is aggressive, they're hardly going to hold their hand up to say "sorry".
So very true. Don't let a lunatic stranger become a big part of your life.A few months ago I was on the M25 in the outside lane with all gantries displaying "40" but all lanes crawling bumper-to-bumper. The next gantry for my lane had an "X" so I slowed down further and merged left. A Polish-registered van that was behind me in the outside lane started flashing me as I did so, presumably for holding him up for 5 seconds. When he drove past me I gave him a w
ker sign. He immediately stopped and leapt out of his van and started walking towards me. He suddenly stopped when (I presume) he suddenly realised that about 100 stationary cars behind us were watching him.I was immediately angry with myself for reacting to his light flashing but also shocked that someone would quite happily leap out of their van in the outside lane of the M25 to come and potentially do who-knows-what to me or my car.
A valuable reminder for me to stay calm and not react to any provocation.
Hereward said:
Sheepshanks said:
I know you can't help yourself sometimes - I did a "WTF" the other day to a traffic cop who pulled across the road in front of me without warning - but you really shouldn't react to other drivers on the road. Look away from them, don't make eye contact. If their driving is aggressive, they're hardly going to hold their hand up to say "sorry".
So very true. Don't let a lunatic stranger become a big part of your life.A few months ago I was on the M25 in the outside lane with all gantries displaying "40" but all lanes crawling bumper-to-bumper. The next gantry for my lane had an "X" so I slowed down further and merged left. A Polish-registered van that was behind me in the outside lane started flashing me as I did so, presumably for holding him up for 5 seconds. When he drove past me I gave him a w
ker sign. He immediately stopped and leapt out of his van and started walking towards me. He suddenly stopped when (I presume) he suddenly realised that about 100 stationary cars behind us were watching him.I was immediately angry with myself for reacting to his light flashing but also shocked that someone would quite happily leap out of their van in the outside lane of the M25 to come and potentially do who-knows-what to me or my car.
A valuable reminder for me to stay calm and not react to any provocation.
t in his place, instead i kind of sat there in shock taking it all in.largelunchbox said:
I think nowadays if you shake you’re head or give the ol coffee bean shake you need to assume that confrontation may be about to happen, if you like it and want a ruck then ok otherwise just ignore them and get on with you’re day however hard that might be to do so.
Agreed, bit your (virtual’ tongue and let them go. A moments reaction can give w whole period of grief. Let them pick on someone else who wants to tussle with them, someone will eventually.It’s one of the things I don’t miss about the Uk since moving to southern Spain nearly 4 years ago.
The Spanish are terrible drivers, but there’s virtually no road rage. Merge in turn is standard… almost unknown for someone to block you joining a lane. Driving just seems far less ‘competitive’ over here… which reflects society in general.
When I come back to the Uk the traffic levels and generally aggressive nature for seemingly no reason is depressing.
The Spanish are terrible drivers, but there’s virtually no road rage. Merge in turn is standard… almost unknown for someone to block you joining a lane. Driving just seems far less ‘competitive’ over here… which reflects society in general.
When I come back to the Uk the traffic levels and generally aggressive nature for seemingly no reason is depressing.
Chris Stott said:
It’s one of the things I don’t miss about the Uk since moving to southern Spain nearly 4 years ago.
The Spanish are terrible drivers, but there’s virtually no road rage. Merge in turn is standard… almost unknown for someone to block you joining a lane. Driving just seems far less ‘competitive’ over here… which reflects society in general.
When I come back to the Uk the traffic levels and generally aggressive nature for seemingly no reason is depressing.
It varies enormously depending on where exactly in the UK you are. Generally speaking, the further from major centres of population you get, the less aggressive drivers seem to be. London is particularly awful. As for why people do it when driving more than they would in other situations, I think it's the same phenomenon as people trolling online; when people are sitting in front of their computer or in their tin box, there is a sort of breakdown of the unwritten rules which govern normal social interactions. The Spanish are terrible drivers, but there’s virtually no road rage. Merge in turn is standard… almost unknown for someone to block you joining a lane. Driving just seems far less ‘competitive’ over here… which reflects society in general.
When I come back to the Uk the traffic levels and generally aggressive nature for seemingly no reason is depressing.
Edited by kambites on Thursday 4th May 19:51
I once shook my head at a white van man who turned off the main road without bothering with an indicator, he immediately gave chase. It was my fault because he'd cut me up at an earlier roundabout he was upset that I'd got close to his van as he cut me up(note I didn't beep, gesticulate, flash, I just braked fairly hard as he'd cut me up). He then blamed me that he just wanted a KFC but had to chase me instead for shaking my head (the road he turned into without indicating was way to KFC) I just told him to enjoy his KFC and drive off.
Very surprisingly this angry white van man was in a slightly chavvy VW Caddy.
More recently I got rear ended, and after denying there was any damage to my damaged bumper, he drove off. Fortunately karma caught him up, a plain clothed police officer witnessed everything, and called it in. He got intercepted 5 minutes later, and promptly arrested for failing to provide a breath sample, and subsequently charged with the offence. The police also kindly gave me his insurance information to claim from, amazingly this was the beginning of March, and his insurance company still hasn't admitted being liable in any way, despite dascham footage of my car in stop start traffic getting rear ended, him speeding off and police evidence, and even an independent witness. Not holding a huge amount of hope for my excess.
This was also a slightly chavvy VW, but this time a Golf.
Very surprisingly this angry white van man was in a slightly chavvy VW Caddy.
More recently I got rear ended, and after denying there was any damage to my damaged bumper, he drove off. Fortunately karma caught him up, a plain clothed police officer witnessed everything, and called it in. He got intercepted 5 minutes later, and promptly arrested for failing to provide a breath sample, and subsequently charged with the offence. The police also kindly gave me his insurance information to claim from, amazingly this was the beginning of March, and his insurance company still hasn't admitted being liable in any way, despite dascham footage of my car in stop start traffic getting rear ended, him speeding off and police evidence, and even an independent witness. Not holding a huge amount of hope for my excess.
This was also a slightly chavvy VW, but this time a Golf.
Edited by carlove on Thursday 4th May 20:06
I'll keep it short. Ordered 4x1 and 6x1 turned up, ended up having a debate on my drive about how I didn't think it was fair he'd taken a fiver out of the refund because he'd had to come and collect it 
the best part being when he was sat in his van and said "ill sort this", got out,slammed the door and marched round to do...nothing 
It might sound really petty but why should I be out of pocket for his mistake?I got my fiver
the best part being when he was sat in his van and said "ill sort this", got out,slammed the door and marched round to do...nothing It might sound really petty but why should I be out of pocket for his mistake?I got my fiver
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