What would you say to Jeremy Clarkson ?

[S3000]

If he was on this board ? and talking rubbish about your favorite car.

[vixen1700]

Your mum, Jeremy.

[B.J.W]

You can't call yourself a proper petrol head until you have fked your personal assistant whilst on location?

[Crow555]

What the fk are 'torques'?

[Monty Python]

Like "carbon dioxides"....only different.

[C2james]

this could get interesting.

[Hammerhead]

Can you get rid of Hamster?

[R1 Loon]

I'd probably have a bit more self-confidence, so that I didn't need to get all huffy that he didn't like it.

[4Q]

I'd ask him where he gets his dry cleaning done, so I can wait for him outside and chat more 'offline'.

[georgejoshington]

"Hello Jeremy Clarkson"

[Caulkhead]

I'd tell him to ignore all the bitter bds on here who are jealous of his job.

[Boba Fret]

I would say "When you are on TV PLEASE could you stop doing that 'sucking air/spittle in through your teeth. It makes me feel violently sick'

Thanks.

[Graham]

C2james said:

this could get interesting.

unlikely

[W00DY]

Dear Jeremy,

I think we should go for a trip round Legoland and afterwards go for a lovely Lamb lunch in the centre of Windsor. What do you say?

I love you.

Please respond.

[LukeBird]

I would probably not say anything and run off to another forum to say he was a tt...


Really... I'd tell him he's a superbly entertaining and comedic chap who is on a decent TV programme!

[davidspooner]

I WILL HAVE YOUR BABIES, darling.

[Pork]

"Alright Jezza......got any jobs ragging nice motors and clowning around?? Please."

[Garlick]

I'd get so giddy and excited! I'd thank him for 'tourques' then I'd ROFL at his Audi driver jokes and then I'd kiss him, and then I'd tell him 10000 times that I have driven an Alfa and so I am a true petrolhead.......then I'd ask him to marry me.

Actually, I'd probably ban him


Only joking Clarkson fans

[B.J.W]

Garlick said:

I'd get so giddy and excited! I'd thank him for 'tourques' then I'd ROFL at his Audi driver jokes and then I'd kiss him, and then I'd tell him 10000 times that I have driven an Alfa and so I am a true petrolhead.......then I'd ask him to marry me.

Actually, I'd probably ban him


Only joking Clarkson fans

Ah, but you've not owned an Alfa

[stuttgartmetal]

Are you shagging that blonde researcher, or can I give her some beans?