Wendy Tucker R.I.P.
Discussion
I would also like to convey my condolances to James and family. I did think of posting the other day when Claire emailed.
James, you clearly loved Wendy dearly. We could see it through your emotions as you battled her long illness together. The low points when you would be at a race meeting on a day when your mind was clearly elsewhere, the high points where Wendy was enjoying better times and able to accompany you to a race meeting or one of the Britcar dinners.
I`m not sure you ever truly get over the loss of someone you love James. There are times in the early days when it hurts so much to think about them you wish you could just press a button and erase their memory all together. A good cry and 5 minutes later you chuckle to yourself as you remember a moment of joy you shared or a little quirk of their personality and you wouldn`t give up those memories for the world. At the moment everything you touch, see or smell grates on a raw emotional nerve and you struggle to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It will get easier James. I promise you.
Talk about Wendy every day James. The tears will flow and sometimes you`ll feel embarrassed about showing your emotions, but true friends don`t mind and anyone who`s lost someone dear to them will not only understand but shed a drop themselves. By talking and sharing your thoughts there will come a time when the memories become less painful. You won`t believe it now but I promise you they will. Eventually you`ll feel them looking out for you and providing a warm blanket of comfort when your mind wanders in their direction.
My thoughts are with you James.
Henry.
James, you clearly loved Wendy dearly. We could see it through your emotions as you battled her long illness together. The low points when you would be at a race meeting on a day when your mind was clearly elsewhere, the high points where Wendy was enjoying better times and able to accompany you to a race meeting or one of the Britcar dinners.
I`m not sure you ever truly get over the loss of someone you love James. There are times in the early days when it hurts so much to think about them you wish you could just press a button and erase their memory all together. A good cry and 5 minutes later you chuckle to yourself as you remember a moment of joy you shared or a little quirk of their personality and you wouldn`t give up those memories for the world. At the moment everything you touch, see or smell grates on a raw emotional nerve and you struggle to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It will get easier James. I promise you.
Talk about Wendy every day James. The tears will flow and sometimes you`ll feel embarrassed about showing your emotions, but true friends don`t mind and anyone who`s lost someone dear to them will not only understand but shed a drop themselves. By talking and sharing your thoughts there will come a time when the memories become less painful. You won`t believe it now but I promise you they will. Eventually you`ll feel them looking out for you and providing a warm blanket of comfort when your mind wanders in their direction.
My thoughts are with you James.
Henry.
James, and of course, all your family, very few words of comfort and sympathy at this devastating and painful time in your lives will help with the sorrow and anguish such a loss brings. However, from one that has been in your position some 20 years ago, there is light at the end of the tunnel,albeit faint at this very moment, it's there. Time passes, and with each new day your inner strength and resilience combined with warm and treasured memories of Wendy will start the healing process, cry your way through the tough bits, I did, for you must allow yourself to grieve and remember all the good things that came from your time together.
I found this to be something of a comfort, may it help you and your family, for it assisted me on my journey to a different but alternative form of normality. Life will never be the same for you without Wendy but strange as it may seem at this point, you will find that, given time, and the love of your family and friends, the pain will pass.
Think of me as one at rest,
for me you should not weep
I have no pain no troubled thoughts
for I am just asleep
The living thinking me that was,
is now forever still
And life goes on without me now,
as time forever will.
If your heart is heavy now
because I've gone away
Dwell not long upon it friend
For none of us can stay
Those of you who liked me,
I sincerely thank you all
And those of you who loved me,
I thank you most of all.
And in my fleeting lifespan,
as time went rushing by
I found some time to hesitate,
to laugh, to love, to cry
Matters it now if time began
If time will ever cease?
I was here, I used it all,
and now I am at peace.
I found this to be something of a comfort, may it help you and your family, for it assisted me on my journey to a different but alternative form of normality. Life will never be the same for you without Wendy but strange as it may seem at this point, you will find that, given time, and the love of your family and friends, the pain will pass.
Think of me as one at rest,
for me you should not weep
I have no pain no troubled thoughts
for I am just asleep
The living thinking me that was,
is now forever still
And life goes on without me now,
as time forever will.
If your heart is heavy now
because I've gone away
Dwell not long upon it friend
For none of us can stay
Those of you who liked me,
I sincerely thank you all
And those of you who loved me,
I thank you most of all.
And in my fleeting lifespan,
as time went rushing by
I found some time to hesitate,
to laugh, to love, to cry
Matters it now if time began
If time will ever cease?
I was here, I used it all,
and now I am at peace.
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