Divorce / Clean Break / CMS issues
Discussion
Got divorced last year and as part of this I let my ex take £50k more than me in the clean break order. I know I could have done better than this but she threatened to cancel the house sale if I wanted to challenge this legally. In order to expedite the house sale and get my kids out of a toxic situation I capitulated without seeking legal advice. Ex has some issues with alcohol which is know to school and social services via school.
Childcare wise we agreed 50:50, although the kids wanted to live with me full time, decided to give the benefit of doubt and see if she could make things work...
Ffwd 3 months and the kids (twins 14) called me from their mums, she's passed out drinking at 7pm can I come and get them. They havent been back and I have an informal agreement from her they can live with me and she will pay CM via the CMS calculation.. all good so far.
Questions are
1. Should I formalise the agreement in court with a C100 and consent order
2. Would there be any scope to reopen my clean break financial consent order under the circumstances (I was coerced into signing, there have been material changes since (Im a single father) and I took no legal advice at the time) to claw back my 50k and would it be worth it given the potential legal costs?
Childcare wise we agreed 50:50, although the kids wanted to live with me full time, decided to give the benefit of doubt and see if she could make things work...
Ffwd 3 months and the kids (twins 14) called me from their mums, she's passed out drinking at 7pm can I come and get them. They havent been back and I have an informal agreement from her they can live with me and she will pay CM via the CMS calculation.. all good so far.
Questions are
1. Should I formalise the agreement in court with a C100 and consent order
2. Would there be any scope to reopen my clean break financial consent order under the circumstances (I was coerced into signing, there have been material changes since (Im a single father) and I took no legal advice at the time) to claw back my 50k and would it be worth it given the potential legal costs?
See a solicitor, however I'd suggest the clean break order will be very hard to reverse and given your comments about wanting to facilitate the arrangements quickly, do you really want the stress of doing this?
No offence, but it doesn’t sound like you were coerced, just incentivised for speed. Also, unless things have changed, a lawyer would have had to sit down with you before submitting the financial consent order to the court to say you were happy with it, and finally the judge would have made a judgment it was fair.
It sounds long shot to me as a non solicitor, but someone that has gone through this.
Re the CMS, again things may have changed, but 5 years ago the rule was that the CMS legally superseded the C100 as long as the C100 had been in place for at least 1year, so no need to go back to court.
Good luck, sounds like a s
t situation, and one I empathise with as my ex is an alcoholic and also had social services involved - it’s st.
No offence, but it doesn’t sound like you were coerced, just incentivised for speed. Also, unless things have changed, a lawyer would have had to sit down with you before submitting the financial consent order to the court to say you were happy with it, and finally the judge would have made a judgment it was fair.
It sounds long shot to me as a non solicitor, but someone that has gone through this.
Re the CMS, again things may have changed, but 5 years ago the rule was that the CMS legally superseded the C100 as long as the C100 had been in place for at least 1year, so no need to go back to court.
Good luck, sounds like a s
t situation, and one I empathise with as my ex is an alcoholic and also had social services involved - it’s st. Definitely not coerced, you said yourself you wanted to expedite the house sale so paid her £50k to make it go smoothly. The sum of money wasn't related to or predicated on child maintenance.
You had the opportunity to get legal advice at the time that might have led to avenues to making it conditional on certain things happening (or not happening), but didn't.
Sounds like a crap situation - definitely get the new arrangement formalised, which sounds like it will be best for all parties.
You had the opportunity to get legal advice at the time that might have led to avenues to making it conditional on certain things happening (or not happening), but didn't.
Sounds like a crap situation - definitely get the new arrangement formalised, which sounds like it will be best for all parties.
If can you agree with her the maintenance and the CMS are notoriously bad, without a court order and proof your resident parent they may well take what the mother says as gospel and you end up paying her. They make HMRC seem like to amazingly good, accurate and loving folk!
I was close to suicide over the CMS my payment tripled over night and the CMS can make you pay that for 6 months while you ask them to reconsider.
Even my EX got fed up with them, they told me lies lost our court order...I could write a book.
They take 3-4 months to get collection payments going minimum.
If she is working and drinking can't see that income being safe anyway.
Best of luck.
I was close to suicide over the CMS my payment tripled over night and the CMS can make you pay that for 6 months while you ask them to reconsider.
Even my EX got fed up with them, they told me lies lost our court order...I could write a book.
They take 3-4 months to get collection payments going minimum.
If she is working and drinking can't see that income being safe anyway.
Best of luck.
jeremyh1 said:
agreements
court orders
Solicitors
These poor kids
The kids are more grown up than the parents!
What do they want how would they like to see it pan out. Its about them and nobody on here has asked how they are!
This just ignores the obvious fact that a reasonable outcome by mutual agreement requires two fully-functioning adults.court orders
Solicitors
These poor kids
The kids are more grown up than the parents!
What do they want how would they like to see it pan out. Its about them and nobody on here has asked how they are!
The OP can be a candidate for world's best father but if the ex doesn't reciprocate he has no choice but to formalise the children's arrangements and to do so at great personal cost and burden can be considered putting their interests above his own.
You can't get a £15 mobile phone contract without some basic checks and a legally binding contract so I don't quite know why we are so averse generally to fixing children's living arrangements by court order when one parent has form for erratic or unreliable behaviour.
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