Just had my first...................
Discussion
I was once passing thru St Albans on a Friday night, going past a pub. Some skinny tw*t shouted 'LOOK, DADDY'S CAR!', not realising that the traffic lights had turned red and I was stopping right in front of him!
I turned my head towards him slowly and replied with a grin 'No, all mine actually. And does your Daddy know you're up past your bedtime little boy?'
He didn't know what to say and the bird on his arm was cracking up. Was particularly satisfying when I blew a kiss to the girl, waved to the tw*t and lit up the tyres as I roared away
I turned my head towards him slowly and replied with a grin 'No, all mine actually. And does your Daddy know you're up past your bedtime little boy?'
He didn't know what to say and the bird on his arm was cracking up. Was particularly satisfying when I blew a kiss to the girl, waved to the tw*t and lit up the tyres as I roared away

GAZ_3884 said: I was once passing thru St Albans on a Friday night, going past a pub. Some skinny tw*t shouted 'LOOK, DADDY'S CAR!', not realising that the traffic lights had turned red and I was stopping right in front of him!
I turned my head towards him slowly and replied with a grin 'No, all mine actually. And does your Daddy know you're up past your bedtime little boy?'![]()
He didn't know what to say and the bird on his arm was cracking up. Was particularly satisfying when I blew a kiss to the girl, waved to the tw*t and lit up the tyres as I roared away
Pure class......
I was taking my girlfriends friend around Maidenhead (one way system) as she hadn't been in my car before.
As I turned the corner outside a busy bar the doorman outside shouted "You're a w*nker!" to which I replyed, "Yeah but your a doorman!" Then I burnt it off down the road.
It then started to rain
As I turned the corner outside a busy bar the doorman outside shouted "You're a w*nker!" to which I replyed, "Yeah but your a doorman!" Then I burnt it off down the road.
It then started to rain

See... it takes all sorts.
I was in town (chez 'uddersfield to be precise) on Saturday afternoon and pulled up at some lights right next to about six or seven 14/16 year olds, you know, the REALLY leary ones! Spent the next half a minute bombarded by, how fast? how much? go on, spin the wheels! nice phone - can I have it? When the lights went green - sorry guys, couldn't resist it - only spun 'em for a couple of seconds though officer honest...
the only verbals I got was six or seven future Pistonheads going YEEEEEAAAHHH!!!

I was in town (chez 'uddersfield to be precise) on Saturday afternoon and pulled up at some lights right next to about six or seven 14/16 year olds, you know, the REALLY leary ones! Spent the next half a minute bombarded by, how fast? how much? go on, spin the wheels! nice phone - can I have it? When the lights went green - sorry guys, couldn't resist it - only spun 'em for a couple of seconds though officer honest...
the only verbals I got was six or seven future Pistonheads going YEEEEEAAAHHH!!!

montegogt said: Hey Oggs. What do you expect with a Chimp!You need a Wedge if you want respect...
This is true... Big wedges scare nova drivers so much they cannot shout obsentiies. My Girlfriend gets very posessive about the wedge when she is in the passenger seat, and has been known to dish out abuse to max powa lads at traffic lights just to humiliate them. ofcourse, that then leaves me to watch them squeal their little tyres and generally make themselves look even more pathetic.
I was in central london on route to pick up the girlie in my Cerb and had pulled up to call her to check where I should be only to hear from behind me "OI YOU FUCxxING WANxxER". Couldn't possibly be talking to me I thought, so I carried on with my phone call. A few moments later this guy was across from the car, staring right at me and shouting at the top of his voice "YOU FUCxxING CUxT WITH YOUR FANCY FUCxxING CAR".
Mild mannered as I normally am, this riled me so much that I threw off the seat belt and stormed out of the car, meanwhile the abuser was rolling up his sleeves indicating he fancied a punch-up. He took one look at me running towards him and thought "oh dear - he's a big lad" and shat it cowering into the corner of a doorway.
Anyway, after some shouting from me, and general advice to not verbally abuse innocent bystanders in such an aggressive manor - if he wants to keep his front teeth intact, it transpired the guy was a tramp sleeping rough!
I felt sorry for him at this point, gave him the couple of quid I had in my pocket, and drove off.
Strange but true.
Mild mannered as I normally am, this riled me so much that I threw off the seat belt and stormed out of the car, meanwhile the abuser was rolling up his sleeves indicating he fancied a punch-up. He took one look at me running towards him and thought "oh dear - he's a big lad" and shat it cowering into the corner of a doorway.
Anyway, after some shouting from me, and general advice to not verbally abuse innocent bystanders in such an aggressive manor - if he wants to keep his front teeth intact, it transpired the guy was a tramp sleeping rough!
I felt sorry for him at this point, gave him the couple of quid I had in my pocket, and drove off.
Strange but true.

That's what we like a compasionate take-no-shit-from-anyone attitude
I was taking the car for a spin last Sunday, and there were three Maxers (must have been going to a cruise wikid innit
) They turned the boom boom music down, wound the windows down, and waited with anticipation. Obviously I pulled along side, dropped a cog and gave it Johny large potatoes
The best bit was about 400 yds further up the road, where I was executing a near perfect drift on my second lap of the roundabout just as they were approaching the junction
By the looks on their faces I had earned some big up respek innit
I was taking the car for a spin last Sunday, and there were three Maxers (must have been going to a cruise wikid innit
) They turned the boom boom music down, wound the windows down, and waited with anticipation. Obviously I pulled along side, dropped a cog and gave it Johny large potatoes The best bit was about 400 yds further up the road, where I was executing a near perfect drift on my second lap of the roundabout just as they were approaching the junction
By the looks on their faces I had earned some big up respek innit

All I can say guys is that whatever crap you get yelled at you in the Tiv is NOTHING to how Porsche drivers are treated by the same tw*ts.
Whilst on holiday I broke down (Two bust tyres in a pot-hole) and was stuck by the roadside. The way some of the passing cars' passengers behaved was despicable. My poor wife was practically in tears. If any of 'em had come within reach I would have willingly throttled 'em.
Still. As I said the wife: Once its repaired we'll be driving off in it - and they will still be in their shitboxes.
Whilst on holiday I broke down (Two bust tyres in a pot-hole) and was stuck by the roadside. The way some of the passing cars' passengers behaved was despicable. My poor wife was practically in tears. If any of 'em had come within reach I would have willingly throttled 'em.
Still. As I said the wife: Once its repaired we'll be driving off in it - and they will still be in their shitboxes.
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You need a Wedge if you want respect...

