Dumb but funny things, when you started driving!
Discussion
Back in the 80s my mate Phil and I were out in his Mini, a beautiful specimen - everybody else had Mayfairs etc so he dubbed this the 'Old Kent Road' edition with striping to match, started life as an 850 but we bunged a breathed on 1300 in it but left the drum brakes stock etc! 
We were coming home from the pub when we got to Meavy Ford, now the road runs around the Ford but this time Phil was sure it was shallow enough for a bit 'Self preservation society' driving!
So knuckles cracked, Guns N Roses blazing through one of Saisho's finest we made a reverse up the small approach, the 5 watt Rally Giants were ignited as we frenzily span in the gravel clawing traction towards what appeared to be a 4 inch deep stream.
You kinda know what's coming now.
The ickle stream turned out to be about a foot and a half deep, dizzy right at the front of the engine got a jacuzzi before a rock stopped the wheels half way across the ford! Of course this lovely Leyland example had the obligatory floor ventilation and we started to fill with water! So, with my new brogues on the roof, chinos rolled up I paddled around to the front to dry the electrics off!
Phil meanwhile found entertainment by periodically firing up the reversing light and scaring the fish, (the standard issue rally spotlight rescued from a previous accident which was now underwater)
Amazingly we got the bloody thing fired up! All rocks moved we actually got ourselves out and continued the journey back home to Tavistock looking back at the road every now and again to check the perfect water trail we were leaving in our wake!
This road home, well it's mostly downhill so when we got to the twisty Magpie bends we suddenly clicked that the drum brakes were full of water!
Like a cross between Sandra Bullock in Speed and Mr Bean on acid Phill wrestled with the 10" Mountney steering wheel to negotiate life or death curves!
Fortunately he triumphed with a little help of the superior shinyside 145x10 tyres!
On the final approach to Tavistock there is a long hill with a zebra crossing near the bottom, normally quiet but on this occasion there were people waiting to cross so out came the shout 'Phill, PEDESTRIONS!'
Brakes were applied to not much avail, the gears were dropped with the 850 diff screaming like a banshee!
The pedestrion waiting to cross could obviously see something wasn't right and didn't start to cross.
I'll never forget the look of absolute shock and disbelief as we finally came to a rest via the handbrake. The look wasn't due to the unorthadox form of stopping but was in amazement of what went on inside the car!
The sudden shock of finally stopping caused all the water in the car to surge to the front, bounce off the dash and render Phill and I literally in the middle of a 'Mini-Tsunami'!!!! The water hit us as if two buckets had been thrown straight in our faces!
Poor old pedestrian, stood there in amazement for about 30 seconds before crossing jawdropped and transfixed on myself and Phill trying to peel our newly freshwater washed 'Madchester' haircuts away from our eyes!
I'm sure to this day the pedestrian must still think he had too many sherberts for it to be real!
We were coming home from the pub when we got to Meavy Ford, now the road runs around the Ford but this time Phil was sure it was shallow enough for a bit 'Self preservation society' driving!
So knuckles cracked, Guns N Roses blazing through one of Saisho's finest we made a reverse up the small approach, the 5 watt Rally Giants were ignited as we frenzily span in the gravel clawing traction towards what appeared to be a 4 inch deep stream.
You kinda know what's coming now.
The ickle stream turned out to be about a foot and a half deep, dizzy right at the front of the engine got a jacuzzi before a rock stopped the wheels half way across the ford! Of course this lovely Leyland example had the obligatory floor ventilation and we started to fill with water! So, with my new brogues on the roof, chinos rolled up I paddled around to the front to dry the electrics off!
Phil meanwhile found entertainment by periodically firing up the reversing light and scaring the fish, (the standard issue rally spotlight rescued from a previous accident which was now underwater)
Amazingly we got the bloody thing fired up! All rocks moved we actually got ourselves out and continued the journey back home to Tavistock looking back at the road every now and again to check the perfect water trail we were leaving in our wake!
This road home, well it's mostly downhill so when we got to the twisty Magpie bends we suddenly clicked that the drum brakes were full of water!
Like a cross between Sandra Bullock in Speed and Mr Bean on acid Phill wrestled with the 10" Mountney steering wheel to negotiate life or death curves!
Fortunately he triumphed with a little help of the superior shinyside 145x10 tyres!
On the final approach to Tavistock there is a long hill with a zebra crossing near the bottom, normally quiet but on this occasion there were people waiting to cross so out came the shout 'Phill, PEDESTRIONS!'
Brakes were applied to not much avail, the gears were dropped with the 850 diff screaming like a banshee!
The pedestrion waiting to cross could obviously see something wasn't right and didn't start to cross.
I'll never forget the look of absolute shock and disbelief as we finally came to a rest via the handbrake. The look wasn't due to the unorthadox form of stopping but was in amazement of what went on inside the car!
The sudden shock of finally stopping caused all the water in the car to surge to the front, bounce off the dash and render Phill and I literally in the middle of a 'Mini-Tsunami'!!!! The water hit us as if two buckets had been thrown straight in our faces!
Poor old pedestrian, stood there in amazement for about 30 seconds before crossing jawdropped and transfixed on myself and Phill trying to peel our newly freshwater washed 'Madchester' haircuts away from our eyes!
I'm sure to this day the pedestrian must still think he had too many sherberts for it to be real!
Corin Denton said:
Back in the 80s my mate Phil and I were out in his Mini, a beautiful specimen - everybody else had Mayfairs etc so he dubbed this the 'Old Kent Road' edition with striping to match, started life as an 850 but we bunged a breathed on 1300 in it but left the drum brakes stock etc!
We were coming home from the pub when we got to Meavy Ford, now the road runs around the Ford but this time Phil was sure it was shallow enough for a bit 'Self preservation society' driving!
So knuckles cracked, Guns N Roses blazing through one of Saisho's finest we made a reverse up the small approach, the 5 watt Rally Giants were ignited as we frenzily span in the gravel clawing traction towards what appeared to be a 4 inch deep stream.
You kinda know what's coming now.
The ickle stream turned out to be about a foot and a half deep, dizzy right at the front of the engine got a jacuzzi before a rock stopped the wheels half way across the ford! Of course this lovely Leyland example had the obligatory floor ventilation and we started to fill with water! So, with my new brogues on the roof, chinos rolled up I paddled around to the front to dry the electrics off!
Phil meanwhile found entertainment by periodically firing up the reversing light and scaring the fish, (the standard issue rally spotlight rescued from a previous accident which was now underwater)
Amazingly we got the bloody thing fired up! All rocks moved we actually got ourselves out and continued the journey back home to Tavistock looking back at the road every now and again to check the perfect water trail we were leaving in our wake!
This road home, well it's mostly downhill so when we got to the twisty Magpie bends we suddenly clicked that the drum brakes were full of water!
Like a cross between Sandra Bullock in Speed and Mr Bean on acid Phill wrestled with the 10" Mountney steering wheel to negotiate life or death curves!
Fortunately he triumphed with a little help of the superior shinyside 145x10 tyres!
On the final approach to Tavistock there is a long hill with a zebra crossing near the bottom, normally quiet but on this occasion there were people waiting to cross so out came the shout 'Phill, PEDESTRIONS!'
Brakes were applied to not much avail, the gears were dropped with the 850 diff screaming like a banshee!
The pedestrion waiting to cross could obviously see something wasn't right and didn't start to cross.
I'll never forget the look of absolute shock and disbelief as we finally came to a rest via the handbrake. The look wasn't due to the unorthadox form of stopping but was in amazement of what went on inside the car!
The sudden shock of finally stopping caused all the water in the car to surge to the front, bounce off the dash and render Phill and I literally in the middle of a 'Mini-Tsunami'!!!! The water hit us as if two buckets had been thrown straight in our faces!
Poor old pedestrian, stood there in amazement for about 30 seconds before crossing jawdropped and transfixed on myself and Phill trying to peel our newly freshwater washed 'Madchester' haircuts away from our eyes!
I'm sure to this day the pedestrian must still think he had too many sherberts for it to be real!
I did 10 tors on Dartmoor, and the rivers are deep.
Nothing as humorous at Corin's but:
Managed to reverse off the side of a dirt track whilst doing a 3 point turn. Far enough to groud teh car and lift the front (and only driven) wheels off the ground. Cue putting the car in first with the engine running then levering the rear wheel up with a large bit of tree then mad dash to get in and stop it going straight off the other side.
Managed to reverse off the side of a dirt track whilst doing a 3 point turn. Far enough to groud teh car and lift the front (and only driven) wheels off the ground. Cue putting the car in first with the engine running then levering the rear wheel up with a large bit of tree then mad dash to get in and stop it going straight off the other side.
I remember shortly after passing my test I went for a weekend's gliding with some mates. We'd taken two cars up there. One night, after a bit to drink and everyone had gone home (we were the only people staying on the airfield), we decided to do a spot of rallying. We thought it wouldn't be too bad, after all the peri track only had a bit of dust on it and there were plenty of run-off areas, and this being the summer, it was bone dry.
Headlights ablaze, the Punto and my mate's Citroen AX set off across the field, up round the track, a few handbrakes on the field, then back down again.
We go back the next morning to find they had to get one of the Land Rovers to bring the roller up as there were tyre marks all over the airstrip
My Mum wasn't too pleased either, when I got back home, to find WRC-style mud and dust-sprays up from the wheels, all over the side windows and covering the rear numberplate.
Took me a whole day to wash that car...
Headlights ablaze, the Punto and my mate's Citroen AX set off across the field, up round the track, a few handbrakes on the field, then back down again.
We go back the next morning to find they had to get one of the Land Rovers to bring the roller up as there were tyre marks all over the airstrip
My Mum wasn't too pleased either, when I got back home, to find WRC-style mud and dust-sprays up from the wheels, all over the side windows and covering the rear numberplate.
Took me a whole day to wash that car...
Rule Number 1 - Fords on Dartmoor are known as Rivers everywhere else! I nearly ruined my first car on Dartmoor, tried to be smart and drive on the grass to get past someone. Was a little bit deeper than expected and I ended up sinking just a little bit...Absolutely ragging the underside of my car on the concrete of the road. 
Was pulled out 2 hours later.
Was pulled out 2 hours later. Whilst making a spoof video for a project at Uni (which we later had to re-make properly 
) my flatmate adn I decided that the last scene should involve my '86 Metro doing some handbrake turns. Well, the only carpak we could find with loose enough gravel to make the ineffective handbrake lock up the wheels was in the local Mosque carpark.
Great, got the shots we wanted, then were chased out by some rather angry chaps who probably thought we were being disrespectful or something.
Anyway, later that evening the only parking space I could find was right outside that Mosque Now, bearing in mind this was Coventry and just on the outskirts of Hillfields (For those in the North, Hillfields = Moss Side. For those in the south, you haven't got a clue, think of Bosnia), I spent the whole night walking outside every hour with a hockey stick to check on the car!
In hindsight the kicking (or worse) I'd have got if anything did happen wasn't worth the risk - not for a Metro anyway!
) my flatmate adn I decided that the last scene should involve my '86 Metro doing some handbrake turns. Well, the only carpak we could find with loose enough gravel to make the ineffective handbrake lock up the wheels was in the local Mosque carpark. Great, got the shots we wanted, then were chased out by some rather angry chaps who probably thought we were being disrespectful or something.
Anyway, later that evening the only parking space I could find was right outside that Mosque
Now, bearing in mind this was Coventry and just on the outskirts of Hillfields (For those in the North, Hillfields = Moss Side. For those in the south, you haven't got a clue, think of Bosnia), I spent the whole night walking outside every hour with a hockey stick to check on the car! In hindsight the kicking (or worse) I'd have got if anything did happen wasn't worth the risk - not for a Metro anyway!
When I was a teen my local hospital in Middx (northwick park hospital) made for a great racetrack at 3:00am i know i know....
One night We were negotiating the staff car park bend and approaching the 'duckers' straight in our bog standard (apart from the rally steering wheel and fat tyres ) mark 2 escort estate when a curb jumped out and we span across the road, up on the grass where we performed a pirouette and chewed up the whole area and came to a stop in a mass of smoke and dust and laughter
We decided it would be prudent to leave the area ASAP, so faculties gathered, car in gear off we went.
It didn't take long to realise we had a buggered wheel, and we were pretty much immobile
So we nursed the car to a dark part of the car park and set about changing the wheel. We then realise we have a jack and a wheel wrench, but nothing to crank the jack with..so we are using wet branches as crank handles etc...
We changed the wheel, and left the hospital and nothing was ever said
I wouldn't do it now of course....
i know i know.... One night We were negotiating the staff car park bend and approaching the 'duckers' straight in our bog standard (apart from the rally steering wheel and fat tyres ) mark 2 escort estate when a curb jumped out and we span across the road, up on the grass where we performed a pirouette and chewed up the whole area and came to a stop in a mass of smoke and dust and laughter
We decided it would be prudent to leave the area ASAP, so faculties gathered, car in gear off we went.
It didn't take long to realise we had a buggered wheel, and we were pretty much immobile
So we nursed the car to a dark part of the car park and set about changing the wheel. We then realise we have a jack and a wheel wrench, but nothing to crank the jack with..so we are using wet branches as crank handles etc... We changed the wheel, and left the hospital and nothing was ever said
I wouldn't do it now of course....
A friend had been doing some donuts in his 200SX in a spot he really shouldn't have been and we noticed that the grass was pretty dug up.
We were the only people staying at this spot so we knew we would get the grief. This was at about midnight so we started picking up grass cuttings from the hedges where they had been dumped and refilling the holes.
All up until Gaz's armful of grass started to wriggle, he'd picked up a badger
We were the only people staying at this spot so we knew we would get the grief. This was at about midnight so we started picking up grass cuttings from the hedges where they had been dumped and refilling the holes.
All up until Gaz's armful of grass started to wriggle, he'd picked up a badger
groomi said:
Hedders, that's one beautiful Daimler you have on your profile.
Does it drive as good as it looks?
Thanks
She used too...But i had an accident in her last year and other responisibilities/lack of finance have got in the way of completing the repairs, so she is off the road these days
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