Ways to stop cat having a dump in the garden?
Discussion
There is a cat, or cats which seem to be taking a dump in my mum's garden more than once a day. It's beginning to become a real PITA.
Any suggestions of things that actually work?
The usual suggestions that have been tried and failed:
The smelly stuff you buy in B&Q
Orange Peel
Water bottles filled with water (the reflection thing)
Bits of goosberry bush cut up and placed around garden (it's thorny)
Mum works during the day and i'm not bloody sitting guard with a supersoaker whilst on holiday
Anybody have a solution?
Cheers,
Rob.
Any suggestions of things that actually work?
The usual suggestions that have been tried and failed:
The smelly stuff you buy in B&Q
Orange Peel
Water bottles filled with water (the reflection thing)
Bits of goosberry bush cut up and placed around garden (it's thorny)
Mum works during the day and i'm not bloody sitting guard with a supersoaker whilst on holiday
Anybody have a solution?
Cheers,
Rob.
anonymous said:
[redacted]
I've heard about this. Apparently it's the smell or something makes them keep away as they think the gardens been claimed by another cat.
Personally, I think that the cat goes into your garden, sees this whacking great lion dump on the lawn, thinks 'My God, what the F
K did THAT?!' and legs it! 
anonymous said:
[redacted]
Live about 70 miles from nearest zoo, and my dads neighbour tried it, it was also a failure
Incorrigable - tried the orange peel thing, didn't seem to work at all, how many oranges are we talking about here - does the garden have to be covered?
The only option left seem to be to train up some rats, then get them to ride badgers and teach them to hunt cats
Rob.
Mix a solution of crab paste with some peanut butter. Take the mixture and add one teaspoon of vinegar, a millipede and a dolphins hat.
Take the resulting combination to B & Q and sprinkle some wood shavings on top.
By now, you will have reached the required viscosity. Journey on from B&Q to the local old peoples home. Gain a sample of 'old womans pee' and carefully mix this in too.
After this, feed the solution to your worse enemy, rendering them dead. Once dead, remove their left eye ball and leave to soak in meths.
In the morning, the eye can be placed in the trouble spot ready for the cat. The cat will mistakingly take the eye to be a badly cooked garden pea.
Cats do not like garden peas, especially after being dipped in meths. This will ensure your cat does not visit this spot again.
Take the resulting combination to B & Q and sprinkle some wood shavings on top.
By now, you will have reached the required viscosity. Journey on from B&Q to the local old peoples home. Gain a sample of 'old womans pee' and carefully mix this in too.
After this, feed the solution to your worse enemy, rendering them dead. Once dead, remove their left eye ball and leave to soak in meths.
In the morning, the eye can be placed in the trouble spot ready for the cat. The cat will mistakingly take the eye to be a badly cooked garden pea.
Cats do not like garden peas, especially after being dipped in meths. This will ensure your cat does not visit this spot again.
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