Burglars Leg chewed off by pet Alligator!
Burglars Leg chewed off by pet Alligator!
Author
Discussion

hedders

Original Poster:

24,460 posts

276 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
Ok, this may not have actually happened

But..honestly what was your first thought when you read the title?

I bet it was: HAHAHAHA

Rather than : I am shocked..why would anyone have a pet alligator?

Am I right?

docevi1

10,430 posts

277 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all


or maybe "that's going to cost the owner of the pet"

yertis

19,707 posts

295 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
My immediate thought was "I wonder how compatible an alligator would be with the whippet, kids, and cats..?"

wolves_wanderer

12,952 posts

266 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
I was expecting to see "Burglar awarded £250,000 compensation for loss of ability to 'work'"

off_again

13,917 posts

263 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
hedders said:

Am I right?



Yep

Followed by a dose of "serves him right" and "...now thats a good idea"....

AllTorque

2,646 posts

298 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
I just thought it HAD to be in America

JagLover

46,743 posts

264 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
hedders said:
Ok, this may not have actually happened

But..honestly what was your first thought when you read the title?

I bet it was: HAHAHAHA

Rather than : I am shocked..why would anyone have a pet alligator?

Am I right?



You are dead right

mybrainhurts

90,809 posts

284 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
Just thinking that's what I call a RESULT....

Then you go and spoil it.......

Twincam16

27,647 posts

287 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
My response was 'where do I get a pet alligator?'

mybrainhurts

90,809 posts

284 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
From a pet alligator shop.....



daft question, tsk......

Twincam16

27,647 posts

287 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
"In Britain, if you want to buy a pet, you go to a pet shop. If you want to buy a pet shop, you go to a pet shop shop. If you want to buy a pet shop shop, you're just being silly"

Little Britain - genius!

NiceCupOfTea

25,586 posts

280 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
Jimmy the Aboriginal.

A rich man living in Darwin decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbours. He also invited Jimmy, the only aboriginal in the neighbourhood.

He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion.

Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating prawns, oysters and BBQ and flirting. At the height of the party, the host said, "I have a 15ft man-eating Crocodile in my pool and I'll give a million dollars to anyone who has the Balls to jump in."

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Jimmy in the pool!

Jimmy was fighting the croc and kicking its ass! Jimmy was jabbing the croc in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, doing all kinds of shit like head butts and chokeholds, biting the croc on the tail and flipping the croc through the air like some kind of Judo Instructor.

The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Jimmy and the croc were screaming and raising hell.

Finally Jimmy strangled the croc and let it float to the top like a K-mart goldfish.

Jimmy then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief.

Finally the host says, "Well, Jimmy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars."

Nah, You right, I don't want it," said Jimmy.

The rich man said, "Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet."

"How about half a million bucks then?"

"No thanks. I don't want it," answered Jimmy.

The host said, "Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was amazing. How about a New Porsche and a Rolex and some stock options?"

Again Jimmy said no.

Confused, the rich man asked, "Well Jimmy, then what do you want?"



Jimmy said, "I want the name of the c*#t who pushed me in.

BliarOut

72,863 posts

268 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
I just thought "That'll teach the er." Nothing more, nothing less

turbobloke

117,129 posts

289 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
BliarOut said:
I just thought "That'll teach the er." Nothing more, nothing less

Then, what a pity about the lack of appetite, they must have just fed it...

volvos70t5

852 posts

258 months

Thursday 28th April 2005
quotequote all
The blood! It'll ruin the carpets!

john75

5,303 posts

276 months

Friday 29th April 2005
quotequote all


If you did not get the joke about the Croc and the Aboriginal try replacing it with the following (Pikey) if you live in middle England (Jew) if you are Arab or an idol of Prince Harry.

(Arab) if you are a jew
(Peadophile) if you read the News of the World

Balmoral Green

42,561 posts

277 months

Friday 29th April 2005
quotequote all
Worth a bump to put it next to joecools post!

YarisSi

1,538 posts

273 months

Friday 29th April 2005
quotequote all
There is a petshop in sheffield where you can or at least could get them. It was only a tiny place but drew as my favorite petshop.