Affair of the Heart ... Advice Pleease?
Discussion
Leaving where I work on Friday ... off to a new firm with new challenges. Can't say I'm going to miss the old place really ... aside from one thing or should I say one person. Over the past few months I've become really close to one of the girls at work. She's Polish, been over here for a few years. She's the one I've asked for advice on behalf on here on occaision in the past. I've helped her out getting her kid into a school around here,helped her with her car etc etc.
She has a boyfriend. You wouldn't think it as they act like theres nothing happening but they are a couple. Problem is the guys a drip and fairly unreliable. She asked me to take her and her son up to Heathrow at the weekend so the kid can fly out to Poland. Asked her if she'd said anything to the boyfriend ... no she hadn't so I said I'd feel more comfortable doing it if she had. She asked him and got the usual umm and err response ... not much use as this is really something where a firm answer is needed. Trouble is she didn't say that she'd asked me to do it first so Lord knows whats going to happen there. She was looking at bus times earlier on today ... I took her to one side and offered to do the run up if wonder boy fails to deliver but I'm not sure she'll take me up on it. You see she told me today that he's jealous of our friendship. Thought that might be the case. Not too sure why to be honest as I never really given him any cause but hey I know some people are very insecure. I'd like to think that when I leave we'd still remain friends and we've swopped addresses / tel nos / e mail addys etc but I have a real feeling that her promise to keep in touch won't come to anything.
Anyway to conclude this ramble any advice on what I should do here? Tell her how I feel because, to be honest, I think I'm in love with her? No stratch that I am in love with her. Or should I simply forget it - perhaps she's using me as an alternative, playing me off against her other half.
Help!
She has a boyfriend. You wouldn't think it as they act like theres nothing happening but they are a couple. Problem is the guys a drip and fairly unreliable. She asked me to take her and her son up to Heathrow at the weekend so the kid can fly out to Poland. Asked her if she'd said anything to the boyfriend ... no she hadn't so I said I'd feel more comfortable doing it if she had. She asked him and got the usual umm and err response ... not much use as this is really something where a firm answer is needed. Trouble is she didn't say that she'd asked me to do it first so Lord knows whats going to happen there. She was looking at bus times earlier on today ... I took her to one side and offered to do the run up if wonder boy fails to deliver but I'm not sure she'll take me up on it. You see she told me today that he's jealous of our friendship. Thought that might be the case. Not too sure why to be honest as I never really given him any cause but hey I know some people are very insecure. I'd like to think that when I leave we'd still remain friends and we've swopped addresses / tel nos / e mail addys etc but I have a real feeling that her promise to keep in touch won't come to anything.
Anyway to conclude this ramble any advice on what I should do here? Tell her how I feel because, to be honest, I think I'm in love with her? No stratch that I am in love with her. Or should I simply forget it - perhaps she's using me as an alternative, playing me off against her other half.
Help!
If you really truly feel that she is the one.
Then you must tell her.
How far away are you moving too?
If it is not too far just keep it friends and see how it develops.
if it is miles away you need to know how she feels about you.
Be prepared for a dented pride just in case.
But what if she is your soulmate and you let her slip away.
As I see it you have nothing to lose.
You only get one life...
(by the way I am not an expert)!!!!
>> Edited by jessica on Tuesday 19th July 20:37
Then you must tell her.
How far away are you moving too?
If it is not too far just keep it friends and see how it develops.
if it is miles away you need to know how she feels about you.
Be prepared for a dented pride just in case.
But what if she is your soulmate and you let her slip away.
As I see it you have nothing to lose.
You only get one life...
(by the way I am not an expert)!!!!
>> Edited by jessica on Tuesday 19th July 20:37
Wiz, I think you should tell her. As someone else said... Tell her, and you may regret it for a few weeks/months, but dont tell her, and you may not get the chance again.
If nothing it will clear the air, hard I know, I have done it in the past, but in the long run, i think it saved us both a lot of heart ache.
(Good luck, and let us know if Mrs F needs to get a new had for the wedding! )
If nothing it will clear the air, hard I know, I have done it in the past, but in the long run, i think it saved us both a lot of heart ache.
(Good luck, and let us know if Mrs F needs to get a new had for the wedding!
)
Jon C said:I agree.
It is better to regret something you have done than to spend a lifetime regretting something you should have done.
It is better to have loved and lost, than to have paid for it, but not enjoyed it.
Ask the girl out, she can only say Niet (or whatever they say in Poland).
And don't be put off by the boyfriend. The ones worth having are usually already attached.
Cheers
Pat
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