Police response? Don't make me larf...
Discussion
Over 65 million people resident in these islands are UK subjects.
We are undoubtedly overpopulated.
However, there are seemingly, certain parts of the nation's infrastructural employment ~ in this case, the police force ~ where being 'stretched to the limit' is an all too common modus operandum.
With so many people standing idle, what on earth is going on?
As I drove past Warehouse Stalag 17 yesterday, performing a quick visual that all the wire was appropriately barbed and other defensive armaments suitably primed, it was clear that in a laybay opposite, adjacent to an attached unit, was positioned a bandit from the school of Salford McKray, professional heisters to the north and beyond.
The dogs, thought I and immediately pulled over and called up the BiB...
[Hugh G on]Or so I thought.[/Hugh G orf]
I should have known better.
I was put through to 'control' several times, on each occasion waiting 5+ minutes before giving up and redialling the switch.
After 20-odd minutes, Mad Frankie Jnr still contemplating his assault plan, I figured retreat and regroup the best plan.
Driving home, another half hour passed during which communication with any sort of law enforcement seemed but a distant dream. Maybe it was best to scour the local free sheet for the clandestine services of a now septugenarian, ex-CIA operative aka The Equaliser?
Hey ho and after another 15 minutes of domestic calling, eureka...ish.
"Did you get the number plate?"
Sorry, I thought staring at Mr.Big's registration might have been an unsubtle and non-cunning thing to do but look, it was a...
"Sorry, Sir but without a number plate there's not a lot we can do."
No, no, you don't understand: somebody is 'scoping the gaff ~ just be a dear and dispatch a panda, whaddya ya say? Just to make sure, please?
"Sorry, Sir but we're overstretched in that area and whilst I can report it on the log I can't say anyone will be able to have a look."
Hopeless: I mean titanically, breathtakingly useless.
Inevitably, at about 2230 hours, in the Boss's LCruiser, it was 'clava on and time for a quick recce to see if the jackals of chaos were exploiting society's fundamental inability to defend itself and mercifully, things were quiet but even so, given the 0200-0400 operating times these guys usually run, it was cold comfort.
This infernal country sometimes seems like way too much hassle.
:banghead:
We are undoubtedly overpopulated.
However, there are seemingly, certain parts of the nation's infrastructural employment ~ in this case, the police force ~ where being 'stretched to the limit' is an all too common modus operandum.
With so many people standing idle, what on earth is going on?
As I drove past Warehouse Stalag 17 yesterday, performing a quick visual that all the wire was appropriately barbed and other defensive armaments suitably primed, it was clear that in a laybay opposite, adjacent to an attached unit, was positioned a bandit from the school of Salford McKray, professional heisters to the north and beyond.
The dogs, thought I and immediately pulled over and called up the BiB...
[Hugh G on]Or so I thought.[/Hugh G orf]
I should have known better.
I was put through to 'control' several times, on each occasion waiting 5+ minutes before giving up and redialling the switch.
After 20-odd minutes, Mad Frankie Jnr still contemplating his assault plan, I figured retreat and regroup the best plan.
Driving home, another half hour passed during which communication with any sort of law enforcement seemed but a distant dream. Maybe it was best to scour the local free sheet for the clandestine services of a now septugenarian, ex-CIA operative aka The Equaliser?
Hey ho and after another 15 minutes of domestic calling, eureka...ish.
"Did you get the number plate?"
Sorry, I thought staring at Mr.Big's registration might have been an unsubtle and non-cunning thing to do but look, it was a...
"Sorry, Sir but without a number plate there's not a lot we can do."
No, no, you don't understand: somebody is 'scoping the gaff ~ just be a dear and dispatch a panda, whaddya ya say? Just to make sure, please?
"Sorry, Sir but we're overstretched in that area and whilst I can report it on the log I can't say anyone will be able to have a look."
Hopeless: I mean titanically, breathtakingly useless.
Inevitably, at about 2230 hours, in the Boss's LCruiser, it was 'clava on and time for a quick recce to see if the jackals of chaos were exploiting society's fundamental inability to defend itself and mercifully, things were quiet but even so, given the 0200-0400 operating times these guys usually run, it was cold comfort.
This infernal country sometimes seems like way too much hassle.
:banghead:
So - to extrapolate - if you're going to break into a warehouse, report yourself to the Police to satisfy yourself they're not interested and that there is zero chance of you being interrupted so that you can steal at your leisure rather tha panic at the prospect of a police car happening to become available.
We have an alarm system at home, whereby the police are automatically called if it is triggered. This service that we pay handsomely for has worked well for the previous 12 years.
Last week, however, we received a letter stating that because we have had a "false alarm" in the last year, the police will now not automatically be sent if the alarm is set off. At the bottom of the letter it says: "If you do have a genuine break in, please inform us and we will review your situation".
Gee thanks.
Last week, however, we received a letter stating that because we have had a "false alarm" in the last year, the police will now not automatically be sent if the alarm is set off. At the bottom of the letter it says: "If you do have a genuine break in, please inform us and we will review your situation".
Gee thanks.
thunderstruck said:
We have an alarm system at home, whereby the police are automatically called if it is triggered. This service that we pay handsomely for has worked well for the previous 12 years.
Last week, however, we received a letter stating that because we have had a "false alarm" in the last year, the police will now not automatically be sent if the alarm is set off. At the bottom of the letter it says: "If you do have a genuine break in, please inform us and we will review your situation".
Gee thanks.
Presumably, you won't be paying quite so handsomely from now on then?
It's interesting how many police out on the street since the London bombings. Now I know that overtime has been increased and leave cancelled. Let's say this has given them another 20% manpower. That still leaves an awful lot of coppers now out on the streets who must be lurk inside police stations the rest of the time.
Thing is, do we have any shortage of traffic wardens, local 'rangers' {nominally titled, notionally empowered, council employed 'Guardian Angel' conceptualees recruited exclusively from the ranks of the long term unemployed, who pace the streets counting discarded blobs of chewing gum} and diversity enfrcement officers?
I rather think not.
Britain needs a good dose of political optimax...
I rather think not.
Britain needs a good dose of political optimax...
GingerNinja said:
We have an alarm system at home, whereby the police are automatically called if it is triggered. This service that we pay handsomely for has worked well for the previous 12 years.
Last week, however, we received a letter stating that because we have had a "false alarm" in the last year, the police will now not automatically be sent if the alarm is set off. At the bottom of the letter it says: "If you do have a genuine break in, please inform us and we will review your situation".
Gee thanks.
Presumably, you won't be paying quite so handsomely from now on then?
You'd think so wouldn't you?
Know how you feel 
, I posted something like this last Xmas, my Sister in Law was broken into and all the presents stole, along with everything else, Police came next day, and were, to be honest, very defeatist and stated that it was unlikely that the burglers would ever be caught, gee thanks!!!! At about the same time the burglers were in her house, me and Chan were driving on a deserted country road, where we came accross a Policeman with a speed gun!!!!! This road was deserted, not even a village for miles, but I guess it showed us where their priorities lie, and it aint protecting us!
, I posted something like this last Xmas, my Sister in Law was broken into and all the presents stole, along with everything else, Police came next day, and were, to be honest, very defeatist and stated that it was unlikely that the burglers would ever be caught, gee thanks!!!! At about the same time the burglers were in her house, me and Chan were driving on a deserted country road, where we came accross a Policeman with a speed gun!!!!! This road was deserted, not even a village for miles, but I guess it showed us where their priorities lie, and it aint protecting us!Oh, how the kids laughed as they ran across the school roof behind our houses, gleefully smashing the tiles and shouting like banshees.
Had the policemen turned up within 10 minutes of the reported sightings, they may have been able to have a chuckle with the funny
ers on the roof.
Unfortunately, they missed the action by a good 25 minutes.
Never mind. Its the normal now isn't it?
Had the policemen turned up within 10 minutes of the reported sightings, they may have been able to have a chuckle with the funny
ers on the roof. Unfortunately, they missed the action by a good 25 minutes.
Never mind. Its the normal now isn't it?
Sometome ago on my industrial estate in broad daylight I saw a gruop of about thirty men, possibly Sri Lankans escaping from the back of an artic lorry after slashing the tarpaulin to get out. I ran back to my unit and rung the local nick and told them if they were able to get a car over pronto (less than 2 mins away)they couldn't miss them................they kindly turned up 17 days later.
Play the game folks, when you call in say you thought you heard one of the masked villains say something racist, or another just confessed to beating his wife, or they were polluting the environment, or had just sprayed a wall with slogans arguing against social justice. You won't need to 5h1t blue lights after that, they'll be in your eyes before you can say political correctness 
turbobloke said:
Play the game folks, when you call in say you thought you heard one of the masked villains say something racist, or another just confessed to beating his wife, or they were polluting the environment, or had just sprayed a wall with slogans arguing against social justice. You won't need to 5h1t blue lights after that, they'll be in your eyes before you can say political correctness
How eloquent of you Mr. Turbobloke. How eloquent.
''I've just seen someone speeding Mr. Officer!''
''Hold on son I'm despatching the chopper as we speak!''
>> Edited by _VTEC_ on Tuesday 16th August 21:16
On a positive note; when we had three cars damaged on our driveway, the police came the following day, took some blood that was left at the scene - unfortunately the chav didn't bleed to death - got a dna match and successfully prosecuted the 
that did it. Even sent me a cheque ffs! Also, they told me the name and address of the er that did it - revenge is a dish best eaten cold but he might find his car ed beyond recognition one morning,
pip pip
that did it. Even sent me a cheque ffs! Also, they told me the name and address of the er that did it - revenge is a dish best eaten cold but he might find his car ed beyond recognition one morning, pip pip
i find the motorway police to be good, i drove past a truck just being licked by flames a couple of months ago, within a couple of minutes two police cars flew past towards it.
local police however. once upon a time my dad came home from the pub and forgot his keys so had to go around the back. one of our vigilant neighbours saw a slightly stumbling man in our back garden at 11pm and called the police. we had a knock on the door at 3 oclock in the morning to make sure everything was alright. aside from being woken in the middle of the night yes, but if we had been burgled you wouldnt have been much bl00dy use would you
local police however. once upon a time my dad came home from the pub and forgot his keys so had to go around the back. one of our vigilant neighbours saw a slightly stumbling man in our back garden at 11pm and called the police. we had a knock on the door at 3 oclock in the morning to make sure everything was alright. aside from being woken in the middle of the night yes, but if we had been burgled you wouldnt have been much bl00dy use would you
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