I cried today
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srebbe64

Original Poster:

13,021 posts

267 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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I went to visit my uncle in hospital today, who's been a little poorly. We had a few laughs - I smuggled in a bottle of whisky for him and we both had a tipple or two out of sight of the nurses!! :beer:

Anyway, after I'd left him I went back to the hospital carpark. I was behind a (mid sixties) chap at the ticket machine who couldn't get it to accept his ten pound note. I offered to swap one to see if that worked - and it did. He then said "it's been a bad day today". "Why?", I asked. "My wife died", he replied. He then burst into tears.

They'd been married for forty five years and this morning he took her to hospital and this evening he returned without her. I hugged him and I too shed tears - we were like a couple of blubbering old women! When I got home I told my wife and she then got upset like me!

The really sad thing is though, is that he has no other family (kids, etc). So I can imagine that tonight will be a very lonely time for the poor chap.

If nothing else, such things put life into perspective! I've got tons of money, big house, nice cars - but I'd trade them all for the sake of my family. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.

me2

188 posts

273 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Nice [but sad] story nicely written.

Lois

14,706 posts

282 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Yeah I know exactly how you feel.
Amazing how someone else's problems can so easily touch your own heart and make you evaluate and appreciate what you have.

Hope you're uncle is ok (and that you checked that any meds he's on aren't contraindicated with alcohol )

DanBoy

4,899 posts

273 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Good on ya though.

Balmoral Green

42,561 posts

278 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Bloody hell, you've got me going now!

jazzybee

3,056 posts

279 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Damn! now you've got me at it!

Well done for 'being there'

Its a shame there does not appear to be some sort of support for family members in situations like that. (Hospital should take him home - cancel parking costs) have someone to sit with him/chat for a while...

EmmaP

11,758 posts

269 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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That is so sad. Many people die very soon after their spouses do. I always feel really sad when I see old men on their own - no jokes please. Loneliness is so very painful.

popov123

4,084 posts

265 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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srebbe64 said:
I went to visit my uncle in hospital today, who's been a little poorly. We had a few laughs - I smuggled in a bottle of whisky for him and we both had a tipple or two out of sight of the nurses!!

Anyway, after I'd left him I went back to the hospital carpark. I was behind a (mid sixties) chap at the ticket machine who couldn't get it to accept his ten pound note. I offered to swap one to see if that worked - and it did. He then said "it's been a bad day today". "Why?", I asked. "My wife died", he replied. He then burst into tears.

They'd been married for forty five years and this morning he took her to hospital and this evening he returned without her. I hugged him and I too shed tears - we were like a couple of blubbering old women! When I got home I told my wife and she then got upset like me!

The really sad thing is though, is that he has no other family (kids, etc). So I can imagine that tonight will be a very lonely time for the poor chap.

If nothing else, such things put life into perspective! I've got tons of money, big house, nice cars - but I'd trade them all for the sake of my family. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.




What an amazing reaction Steve, you should feel proud of yourself. Your kindness will probably be something that will live on with this guy for a long time.



>> Edited by popov123 on Friday 16th September 22:31

Kinky

39,944 posts

299 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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This is a good opportunity to now phone/turn to your parents/children/other halves and tell them you love them.

K

ZR1cliff

17,999 posts

279 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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los angeles said:


srebbe64 said:
Who knows what tomorrow will bring.


Very true, Srebbe. The Americans have a saying, "Pass it on," meaning, when you are shown a kindness by a friend or stranger pass it on to another, which is the same, I guess, as, "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you."




Its a shame everyone dint think like that LA ,i always try to help people as much as possible but i think the down side is i feel so let down when others dont treat you right especially when others purposely tuck others up.
Srebbe,fair play to you mate as its a very difficult situation when dealing with upset strangers,i get it now and again in my cab,i have this theory of dealing with sadness its kind of like looking at the 'Sweet & Soure effect' and feel it offsets against your happier times.

>> Edited by ZR1cliff on Friday 16th September 22:34

mrmaggit

10,146 posts

278 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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A timely reminder that life is not a dress rehersal.

I wish you, and your loved ones, all well.

maggit

DocJock

8,722 posts

270 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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Good man S64

When my missus was at deaths door I was having a good weep in the hospital cafe and an old dear came up and put her arm around me....

I can't tell you how much it meant to me right at that moment.

You probably did much, much more for him than you realise.

srebbe64

Original Poster:

13,021 posts

267 months

Friday 16th September 2005
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los angeles said:
Srebbe: YHM.

As do you, LA.

srebbe64

Original Poster:

13,021 posts

267 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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los angeles said:
Duly exchanged.


vixpy1

42,699 posts

294 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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Someone close to me lost someone close to them this week

All i can do is put my arms around her and give her a big hug.

You can be rich, poor, any race under the sun, but all you can do is put your arms round someone and give them a hug.

In that moment, we are all equal.

rude-boy

22,227 posts

263 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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You almost got me at it to reading you post - I really shouldn't look at this sort of thing when I'm tired.

I hope that if ever I'm in the same situation I would act as you or, indeed, ran into someone like you as the old boy did.

I know a few people whose lives have taken a different direction this year, mine included, and if nothing else it's reminded me that life is not a dress rehearsal. Enjoy the good, learn from the bad but most of all live life
.

Pot Bellied Fool

2,261 posts

267 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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srebbe64 said:
I hugged him and I too shed tears

Nice one Chap!

Forget money, forget toys, forget even optimax - today you made a difference.

When I lost my Dad a few months back, it was the little things that made a difference, the nurses gving a hug & showing me the back way out, the paperwork guy running through the hospital to get some papers to us so we could get the funeral date we wanted (& he thought it was no big deal that he did that - top guy!) and my mate (first port of call) who greeted me with a hug & a pasty!!

But it's those odd things that help, that make the difference and you fella - he doesn't know you, he has no idea what you do, who you are, rich or poor, single or wed but he does know that some stranger cared enough to get off his arse & show some humanity.

If I had any Scotch in the house I'd raise one to ya - well done!

volvos70t5

852 posts

259 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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Well done s64.

About 10 years ago we met an old chap through a friend of a friend. Although well past retirement age, he had worked all his life and just couldn't bear to stop. He was a widower, his only child was estranged from him due to a pig of a husband and his only sister was the other side of the country.

He started doing odd-jobs for us and then some pretty big ones (new floors, etc..)

He was the absolute salt of the earth. On a par only with my own father and SWMBO's father.

He died suddenly of cancer and it was a hell of a shock. In the end, we only knew him about 9 months but, even now, some 7 years on, I am so glad that we met him.

There are literally hundreds of thousands of good hearted, kind people in this world who are lonely and all it takes is a little bit of digging to find them.
And when you do, boy is it worth it!

Highway Star

3,615 posts

261 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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Gazboy said:

Balmoral Green said:
Bloody hell, you've got me going now!



And me, bloody hell.

Nicely written Steve, so simple yet so emotive.


Me too

Well done, it probably meant more to him than you can ever realise

I wonder how many people today would have just walked away...

cymtriks

4,561 posts

275 months

Saturday 17th September 2005
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Good that you were there.

The same thing happened to me years ago. I was standing outside a phone box and suddenly the girl inside burst out in tears and wept on my shoulder. Her brother had died in a car crash.

I lost my mum to cancer last year. I'm always glad that I made an effort to keep in touch; so many people regret not keeping in touch when they realise someone is gone.

On a positive note losing someone close can often force a reappraisal of your life and make you focus more on getting closer to your own goals in the time you have left.