Dave Knows Everyone
TOPIC CLOSED
TOPIC CLOSED
Author
Discussion

PinkPanther

Original Poster:

1,010 posts

294 months

Friday 7th October 2005
quotequote all
Dave was bragging to his boss one day,

"You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."

Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff,
"OK, Dave, how about Tom Cruise?"

"No drama boss, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."

So Dave and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door and Tom Cruise shouts, "Dave! What's happenin?!? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!"

Although impressed, Dave's boss is still sceptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Ian that he thinks Dave's knowing Cruise was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Dave says.

"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.

"Yup," Dave says, "Old buddies, let's fly out to Washington." And off they go.

At the White House, Bush spots Dave on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Dave, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."

Well, the boss is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The pope," his boss replies.

"Sure!" says Dave. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time." So off they fly to Rome.

Dave and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Dave says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."

And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Dave emerges with the Pope on the balcony but by the time Dave returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss' side, Dave asks him, "What happened?"

His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who the f**k's that on the balcony with Dave?"

>> Edited by PinkPanther on Friday 7th October 10:03

JonRB

80,067 posts

302 months

Friday 7th October 2005
quotequote all
Old joke, made all the worse by the fact that the Pope is no longer Polish!

r988

7,496 posts

259 months

Friday 7th October 2005
quotequote all
JonRB said:
Old joke, made all the worse by the fact that the Pope is no longer Polish!



I agree its not hard to change a couple of words from Polish to French, and shouldn't this be in the sean connery joke thread anyway?

wolves_wanderer

12,956 posts

267 months

Friday 7th October 2005
quotequote all
r988 said:

JonRB said:
Old joke, made all the worse by the fact that the Pope is no longer Polish!




I agree its not hard to change a couple of words from Polish to French, and shouldn't this be in the sean connery joke thread anyway?


Isn't he German?

andy mac

73,668 posts

285 months

Friday 7th October 2005
quotequote all
The new Pope is some sort of Sith lord Emporer chap! (The resemblence is uncanny!)



Cue the music...

Der der der dum der der, dum der der...

>> Edited by andy mac on Friday 7th October 11:04
TOPIC CLOSED
TOPIC CLOSED