Window sales cold callers

[Jared_m]

Got a call from someone trying to sell windows... again...

Q: Sir, what kind of windows have you got?
A: Glass ones

Q: Could you describe them a bit more?
A: Sure, I can see through them and can look into my lovely garden

Q: Do they have plastic or metal frames?
A: I'm not sure really, they could be rubber or latex maybe?

*at this point she changes her line of questioning*

Q: Do you know a burglar could probably gain entry to your property within 30 seconds?
A: So?

Q: Well, we could provide you windows that are resistant to thieves. Could we send someone to check the security of your windows?
A: No, I'm not too bothered about burglars. I sit at home most of the time with my shotgun just waiting for someone to gain entry unlawfully.

Q: Right.... you're saying you keep a shotgun?
A: Yep, anything else I can help with?

She seemed quite thrown by my response, thanked me for my time and hung up


PS: To any concerned plods: I don't really own a shotgun (or any form of firearm). I'm tired of idiots calling me even though I'm registered on the TPS.

[Podie]

I've had something similar...

Q: Do you know a burglar could probably gain entry to your property within 30 seconds?
A: Fine, but I live in a fifth floor flat so if they take anything they've kinda earned it...

[Twincam16]

I have a similar line if they come knocking at the door:

"Can I interest you in new windows and doors sir?"

"No thanks, we've got a full set at the moment".

I've never had the 'burglar' spiel, but I've had 'do you want to save £xxx on your heating bills' before now.

[Witchfinder]

Just tell them "That's alright, I'm a burglar too. If anything gets stolen, I'll just nick a new one."

[wiggy001]

I bricked up my windows to avoid paying window tax...