Funeral Procession Flashing Lights

[mel]

Now avaliable at your local undertakers it appears hearse's are being fitted with "purple" strobes and flashing light bars "to help keep processions together and warn other members of the public of their slow nature"

[Lois]

I don't want my procession to go slow. I want it to break the speed limits and if the cops have a problem I'll write in my will that they can take it up with me

[Plotloss]

I take it that they will be replacing the standard man in black hat with a man in a burberry cap to complete the ensemble?

Wikkid death, innit...

[thunderstruck]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

[R988]

I guess they already have spinners and hydraulic suspension as well. Probably the back is so full of subwoofers that the coffin wont fit in so they have to stick the corpse on the front passenger seat.

[maxc]

Check out one of my racing sponsors - www.motorcyclefunerals.com Their strap line is Slow, fast and very fast funerals! Real characters who run bike and sidecar based hearses, and the MD Paul is infamous for being stopped by the police during a funeral for not wearing a helmet. One of his bikes is a Suzuki Hyabusa and can do a genuine 180 - and this gets requested. Others are Harleys and Triumphs. Apart from the irony of being sponsored by them, I intend to use their services when the time comes anyway as it beats the hell out of a slow ride in the back of an old Granada hearse and would make my mates smile.

IIRC, Didn't Innes Ireland stipulate his hearse had to do 100mph during the funeral procession?

[Plotloss]

360bhp tarmac drag racing snowmobile



I am humbled by your lunacy!

[Balmoral Green]

Just out of interest, why do they go so slow? I dont see why simply being dead gives anyone the right to inconvenience motorists or obstruct traffic. Where does it say that 'after my death I would like to be a bit of a nuisance on the roads to some folks I dont know'. It's a bit of a daft tradition isnt it, and displays no respect by the dead for the living. I will ensure that for me, the cortege travels at normal speeds.

[chassis 33]

Dunno, but my dad often tells us about the time he lost a drag race with a Daimler Double Six hearse in Liverpool during his youth

Regards
Iain

[aldi]

I allways turn my tunes off and slow down when I see a hearse, don't remember who I picked that up from just something I've allways done...

[vixpy1]

Would'nt be caught dead in that...

[mrmaggit]

Five years ago a good friend of mine died, there were so many people at the funeral service that it was standing room only in the chapel. But the one thing that I'll remember till I die was the group of four employees digging a trench that stopped digging and stood, facing the cortege, hands on the top of their shovels as we passed.

It was such a simple, yet touching gesture.

I'm sure they never knew Arthur, but I'm sure he'd have nodded, as I did, for that simple gesture.

Fills me up, even now, just remembering it.

maggit



>> Edited by mrmaggit on Tuesday 13th December 21:57

[mel]

maxc said:

www.motorcyclefunerals.com Their strap line is Slow, fast and very fast funerals! Real characters who run bike and sidecar based hearses

That is superb !!!! and when the day comes is what i'd want

[wedg1e]

chassis 33 said:

Dunno, but my dad often tells us about the time he lost a drag race with a Daimler Double Six hearse in Liverpool during his youth Regards Iain

Wouldn't surprise me. At the Co-op we had a Senator 3L that was death on wheels to hot hatches, even though hearses are usually a lot heavier than you'd think 'cos of all that GRP and glass! Even the 2L Carlton autos would pull 120+.

[chrisgr31]

Balmoral Green said:

Just out of interest, why do they go so slow? I dont see why simply being dead gives anyone the right to inconvenience motorists or obstruct traffic. Where does it say that 'after my death I would like to be a bit of a nuisance on the roads to some folks I dont know'. It's a bit of a daft tradition isnt it, and displays no respect by the dead for the living. I will ensure that for me, the cortege travels at normal speeds.

They go slow out of respect for the dead, but I suppose it may be to stop them waking up if they are only asleep!

Having said that I have seen them in a tearing hurry when they have been held up!

[Matthew-TMM]

chrisgr31 said:

Balmoral Green said: Just out of interest, why do they go so slow? I dont see why simply being dead gives anyone the right to inconvenience motorists or obstruct traffic. Where does it say that 'after my death I would like to be a bit of a nuisance on the roads to some folks I dont know'. It's a bit of a daft tradition isnt it, and displays no respect by the dead for the living. I will ensure that for me, the cortege travels at normal speeds. They go slow out of respect for the dead, but I suppose it may be to stop them waking up if they are only asleep! Having said that I have seen them in a tearing hurry when they have been held up!

Perhaps it's so that even 'dozy Doris in her beige micra' (to quote another PHer) can keep up with the procession.

[markmullen]

I've been asked to do some driving for a local funeral directors on my days off, I must remeber not to thrash it!

I had always understood that the Daimlers etc were somehow geared down for slow speeds but apparently not, they are standard cars and as such will pull 3 figures with ease.

[wedg1e]

markmullen said:

I've been asked to do some driving for a local funeral directors on my days off, I must remeber not to thrash it! I had always understood that the Daimlers etc were somehow geared down for slow speeds but apparently not, they are standard cars and as such will pull 3 figures with ease.

Give it a stab! It's quite challenging car control, trying not to run down the Director as he walks two paces in front of your front bumper And being REALLY smooth is an art form. I used to be able to get one of the Directors to nod off in the passenger seat
If you can, get on the hearse. You have to think for three or more drivers then...