Blonde moments
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Muncher

Original Poster:

12,235 posts

279 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
quotequote all
Two of my friends at uni are somewhat "blonde", changing a light bulb presents a challenge!

I was round there the other night, went to use the bathroom sink and found it blocked and full of water.

Apparently, one of them was burning a bloody huge candle and either some of it spilt or she just decided to get rid of the wax, by pouring it down the sink...

victormeldrew

8,293 posts

307 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
quotequote all
That was bright of her.

Bright = light = candle; see what I did there? I'll get me coat.

vixpy1

42,699 posts

294 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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victormeldrew said:
That was bright of her.

Bright = light = candle; see what I did there? I'll get me coat.


That was Wicky of you

r988

7,498 posts

259 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Stop waxing obn about it

pdV6

16,442 posts

291 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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These puns really get on my wick.

Liszt

4,337 posts

300 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Best just to melt away in to the background after a pun like that

branflakes

2,039 posts

268 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
quotequote all
Another genuine blonde moment involving a candle as reported to me by my wife who worked in the customer service dept of a certain moose-loving furniture chain:

Customer (blonde of course) demands a refund for a candle she bought.
Wife: What's the reason for the return?
Customer: The candle melted.
Wife: Do you know why it melted?
Customer: Because I lit it.
Wife: <pause> What did you expect it to do?
Customer: I didn't expect it to melt the way it did.

I'm still trying to persuade my wife to write a book on her experiences with the utterly insane customers she's had to deal with - this, along with the hormonal 4'10" tall woman who kidnapped not one but TWO 6'+ tall delivery drivers and the woman who, on asking what colour a white wardrobe was, got abusive and threatened to sue when she recieved the reply "err, white..." are just a few of many...

>> Edited by branflakes on Thursday 15th December 11:55

anonymous-user

84 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
quotequote all
Liszt said:
Best just to melt away in to the background after a pun like that

She sounds like an old FLAME of mine.

jimothy

5,151 posts

267 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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I bought a water sack from a camping shop for a festival.
The future MrsJimothy asked me what it was. I told her it was dehydrated water.

"Oh", she says, "What do you mix it with then?"

This is true, and she meant it. She is blonde.

randlemarcus

13,646 posts

261 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Better stop this before the humour gets tallow for polite conversation.

anonymous-user

84 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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This is turning into a real hive of information.

Rob_F

4,155 posts

294 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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I'm certainly feeling the buzz of excitement.

Cheers,
Rob.

wedg1e

27,040 posts

295 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Give it up; it's not worth the candle

randlemarcus

13,646 posts

261 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Here come the mods to snuff this thread out.

killsta

1,845 posts

258 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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randlemarcus said:
Here come the mods to snuff this thread out.


They can all buzz off, can't they?

kerfuffle

5,253 posts

284 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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I did a similar thing. Had been on a date, got her upstairs, lit a candle on a bookshelf, started my highly erotic pre-mating dance, then she mentioned something about a burning smell. I replied with a "Well you're not the first woman to say that my dear" sort of line, looked round and noticed the shelf above had caught fire.

Try as I might to get back into the Stringfellow Zone, I found myself giggling every couple of minutes

Pigeon

18,535 posts

276 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Went camping with some mates once... we were all sat round in the tent ("We could all be sat round...") with illumination provided by eight candles in a metal pie dish, all flickering merrily away.

After a while the heat melted the candles, so what we then had was a metal pie dish full of molten wax with eight wicks sticking out of it, all still flickering merrily away as if they were still part of complete candles.

But the heat continued to build up, until it got to the point where the dish of molten wax was hot enough to generate a combustible concentration of vapour by evaporation direct from the surface without the help of the wicks. All of a sudden we had a huge great flame as if the dish was full of petrol. It's remarkable how quick you can get stuff out of a tent when you really need to, and we managed to limit the damage to the door flaps, which had massive holes in.

UncleDave

7,155 posts

261 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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I've got a burning feeling this post is going to go downhill from here

randlemarcus

13,646 posts

261 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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Just as long as it doesnt descend into a flame war...

polus

4,343 posts

255 months

Thursday 15th December 2005
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There's no use crying over spilled wax.

dear god, its good i have a day job!