Been Threatened, Advice please
Discussion
I am hoping someone on here can help me out please. Maybe one of the BiB?
I am a member of admin on another forum, Wednesday night I had just reason to ban for a week 2 members, basically for using each other's login details and one of them had posted a very libelous post.
It has since transpired that the use of other identities was not on the forum, but elsewhere, so one had the ban lifted, the other is still banned for breach of forum terms and conditions.
Not exactly the crime of the century I know, but he has taken it quite badly, they guy can be a bit of nutter anyway, and has a serious problem with me at the best of times, so yesterday morning I got up to find the nicest possible kind of abusive text message on my phone. (duly forwarded to the rest of the admin team) and yesterday afernoon I got another one from him, basically this one is a threat, telling me to get my facts right and watch myself very carefully as something big is about to happen.
Again this has been forwarded to the admin team, and I have since had a text from one of the team warning me that the person is on the warpath.
Is there anything I can do? is it worth reporting this to the police and or his mobile phone provider? To be honest I am a bit freaked by it, he's capable of anything.
I am a member of admin on another forum, Wednesday night I had just reason to ban for a week 2 members, basically for using each other's login details and one of them had posted a very libelous post.
It has since transpired that the use of other identities was not on the forum, but elsewhere, so one had the ban lifted, the other is still banned for breach of forum terms and conditions.
Not exactly the crime of the century I know, but he has taken it quite badly, they guy can be a bit of nutter anyway, and has a serious problem with me at the best of times, so yesterday morning I got up to find the nicest possible kind of abusive text message on my phone. (duly forwarded to the rest of the admin team) and yesterday afernoon I got another one from him, basically this one is a threat, telling me to get my facts right and watch myself very carefully as something big is about to happen.
Again this has been forwarded to the admin team, and I have since had a text from one of the team warning me that the person is on the warpath.
Is there anything I can do? is it worth reporting this to the police and or his mobile phone provider? To be honest I am a bit freaked by it, he's capable of anything.
I cannot change my mobile number as it is the phone that I use for my business and is printed on all my paperwork etc.
As to keeping him off the web site... my finger is itching to hit the 'delete user' button.
The libelous comment was actually about a company and it was really close to the bone and on a public part of the website, hence it had to be removed before we ended up in court. It was also a breach of the T&C so hence the temp ban (I did want to do a permanent ban, but was advised to just do a week to give him timje to cool off)
As to keeping him off the web site... my finger is itching to hit the 'delete user' button.
The libelous comment was actually about a company and it was really close to the bone and on a public part of the website, hence it had to be removed before we ended up in court. It was also a breach of the T&C so hence the temp ban (I did want to do a permanent ban, but was advised to just do a week to give him timje to cool off)
No one near me at the moment.
I am not sure that he would take the effort to come up here (I'm in the NW, he's in the SE), last time there was a flare up he registered me on some sort of porn dating site, I called the police about that one, but it couldn't be proved that he was the one that had registered me.
Obviously he has said something to another member hence the fact they have warned me he is on the warpath, I am going to phone this other member and ask for details, then I have that along with the texts on my phone to go to the police with.
Thanks for your advice so far, at least now I don't feel like I am over reacting (he's te one doing that!)
I am not sure that he would take the effort to come up here (I'm in the NW, he's in the SE), last time there was a flare up he registered me on some sort of porn dating site, I called the police about that one, but it couldn't be proved that he was the one that had registered me.
Obviously he has said something to another member hence the fact they have warned me he is on the warpath, I am going to phone this other member and ask for details, then I have that along with the texts on my phone to go to the police with.
Thanks for your advice so far, at least now I don't feel like I am over reacting (he's te one doing that!)
Humpback, thanks for that, will give it some thought.
I have got in touch with the other members of the admin team and told them that I am collating all the 'evidence' with the view to taking it to my local police station, and have asked them to pass to me anything he has said to them about me and this situation, (be it transcipts from MSN, Skpe, or text messages).
He's the sort of person that shouts his mouth off, so he has no doubt had somnething to say to them, basically he's tying his own noose.
I wasn't sure if it would be something that the police would take seriously, but I won't lose anything by telling them about it.
I have got in touch with the other members of the admin team and told them that I am collating all the 'evidence' with the view to taking it to my local police station, and have asked them to pass to me anything he has said to them about me and this situation, (be it transcipts from MSN, Skpe, or text messages).
He's the sort of person that shouts his mouth off, so he has no doubt had somnething to say to them, basically he's tying his own noose.
I wasn't sure if it would be something that the police would take seriously, but I won't lose anything by telling them about it.
I can't believe that a personal threat to one of the admins would not be grounds for instant, permanent banning, I would have one of your peers pull the plug on him immediately. If not all of the other forum members will think they can get away with this crap. Is a verbal or written threat considered assault in the U.K.? If so I would contact the Police post haste.
a few easy steps
1. Inform Police immediately
2. Ignore the prat totally...chances are he is a bully and will not do anything/get bored
3. Make sure as many people are as aware as possible so if anything does happen, he is bang to rights
4. Try not to worry (easy to say i know)
5. Keep all the evidence
6. Dont do anything else to wind the idiot up...let others take any action
7. In future....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT PUT PERSONAL DETAILS UP FOR GRABS
Good luck..
edited to say....
i've also just read that your in the NW and he is SE...this pathetic little weasel will not bother to travel....i was under the impression he was in the same town as you....ignore him and do the above steps
>> Edited by Nick P on Friday 20th January 08:40
1. Inform Police immediately
2. Ignore the prat totally...chances are he is a bully and will not do anything/get bored
3. Make sure as many people are as aware as possible so if anything does happen, he is bang to rights
4. Try not to worry (easy to say i know)
5. Keep all the evidence
6. Dont do anything else to wind the idiot up...let others take any action
7. In future....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT PUT PERSONAL DETAILS UP FOR GRABS
Good luck..
edited to say....
i've also just read that your in the NW and he is SE...this pathetic little weasel will not bother to travel....i was under the impression he was in the same town as you....ignore him and do the above steps
>> Edited by Nick P on Friday 20th January 08:40
There is a standard two fold approach to this kind of harassment.
Firstly make it clear to them ONCE (in writing in a form that you can keep and produce) that their behaviour is unacceptable and that you if it is repeated you will immediately report it to the Police. If the behaviour is continued in ANY way that you can prove is them (text, calls etc.) you go STRAIGHT to the Police with the evidence which should include your communication to them that they should not contact you in this way.
Secondly, after your one and only warning to them, ignore them completely, do not respond in anyway, even to tell them to
off! These people thrive on the response that they get from you, they like to think that they are worrying you and affecting your life. So you cut the oxygen off to them and do not response in anyway at all.
They are the sad bunny, not you.
I agree that to me it sounds like a reason for permanent banning from the forum but I would suggest you let the other moderators deal with this person from now on and that you distance yourself from them.
Good luck.
Firstly make it clear to them ONCE (in writing in a form that you can keep and produce) that their behaviour is unacceptable and that you if it is repeated you will immediately report it to the Police. If the behaviour is continued in ANY way that you can prove is them (text, calls etc.) you go STRAIGHT to the Police with the evidence which should include your communication to them that they should not contact you in this way.
Secondly, after your one and only warning to them, ignore them completely, do not respond in anyway, even to tell them to
off! These people thrive on the response that they get from you, they like to think that they are worrying you and affecting your life. So you cut the oxygen off to them and do not response in anyway at all. They are the sad bunny, not you.
I agree that to me it sounds like a reason for permanent banning from the forum but I would suggest you let the other moderators deal with this person from now on and that you distance yourself from them.
Good luck.
We are all part of the same campaign group, it's not just web based, the forum is our main communication tool, we do tend to meet up at various points during the year, he was a friend, one day he just turned sh1tty on me, I think he resented me being made part of the admin team when he had been a member longer than I had (this is the mentality we are dealing with), diplomacy is not his strongest point, qualities used for expanding the admin team are not done on length of service! he just couldn't see that.
Like I say 2 years ago he was a friend, and quite a good friend at that. Hu just turned one day and it's been hard work since, but this time he has gone too far. (usually it's just the odd insult and sarky comment to anything I post)
Like I say 2 years ago he was a friend, and quite a good friend at that. Hu just turned one day and it's been hard work since, but this time he has gone too far. (usually it's just the odd insult and sarky comment to anything I post)
speedchick said:
We are all part of the same campaign group, it's not just web based, the forum is our main communication tool, we do tend to meet up at various points during the year, he was a friend, one day he just turned sh1tty on me, I think he resented me being made part of the admin team when he had been a member longer than I had (this is the mentality we are dealing with), diplomacy is not his strongest point, qualities used for expanding the admin team are not done on length of service! he just couldn't see that.
Like I say 2 years ago he was a friend, and quite a good friend at that. Hu just turned one day and it's been hard work since, but this time he has gone too far. (usually it's just the odd insult and sarky comment to anything I post)
sounds like had has a thing for you and is now sour grapes cos you knocked him back ???
ask him to come and visit me so i can feed the little shrimp a bit of military sandwich
>> Edited by Nick P on Friday 20th January 08:53
Nick P said:
a few easy steps
1. Inform Police immediately
2. Ignore the prat totally...chances are he is a bully and will not do anything/get bored
3. Make sure as many people are as aware as possible so if anything does happen, he is bang to rights
4. Try not to worry (easy to say i know)
5. Keep all the evidence
6. Dont do anything else to wind the idiot up...let others take any action
7. In future....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT PUT PERSONAL DETAILS UP FOR GRABS
Excellent advice.Even though the guy is a long way away and i am sure is just posturing I would still advise the police if he has threatened you.
los angeles said:
If matters are as you describe, Speedchick, he is crossing the line from venting to stalking. The Internet is full of weirdos which is why I and others do not have our names or addresses on our profiles. We don't want them following us home. Every-so-often some jerk oversteps the mark using Internet anonimity to post abuse. Democracy means free speech but not freedom to threaten, or libel. A web site moderator has to act swiftly to show anarchy won't be tolerated. I'd counsel you or a colleague drop a guillotine on his shenanigans immediately. Anything less is encouragement. Expressing you anxieties on this site is evidence he needs disciplined. If he has text-messaged you it certainly needs reporting to the police. A walk to your nearest local police station with it all in writing, with a request that they register your complaint against him, will help alleviate your fears to some extent. But first, let him know what you intend to do in one sharp, unambiguous sentence. Tell him his behaviour is unacceptable and unless he stops now you will bring him to the notice of the police.
Do you have anyone near you now that you can confide in for safety?
Absolutely, Los Angeles. I won't go into details but some nutter, unknown to me, stalked me around town one lunch-time. Luckily I had witnesses and reported him straight to the police who, amazingly, took it seriously. Two weeks later when he caught sight of me he did it again, so I went in person to the police station. They've read him the riot act and he has apologised for his behaviour - he claimed he's a happily married man!
Poor wife, if only she knew what he gets up to. Keep the text messages to show the police as evidence.
Good luck, Speedychick - and watch out, there's plenty of them about!
speedchick said:
We are all part of the same campaign group, it's not just web based, the forum is our main communication tool, we do tend to meet up at various points during the year, he was a friend, one day he just turned sh1tty on me, I think he resented me being made part of the admin team when he had been a member longer than I had (this is the mentality we are dealing with), diplomacy is not his strongest point, qualities used for expanding the admin team are not done on length of service! he just couldn't see that.
Like I say 2 years ago he was a friend, and quite a good friend at that. Hu just turned one day and it's been hard work since, but this time he has gone too far. (usually it's just the odd insult and sarky comment to anything I post)
It's strange when that happens. I was asked to join the admin team for an owners club a few years ago and a couple of members, who'd been around as long or longer than me, seriously got their noses out of joint, despite the fact we were good mates before.
One thing you have to remember as an admin/moderator, you will upset people by doing things that are genuinely for the good of your group or community. You can point out the T&Cs, the rules and even the law and people will still get pissed off at you for not letting them do what they want to.
I've done this in the past and I got death threats as a result. However so many people hide behind what they think is a wall of anonymity on the internet, that they can say what ever they like to you because you're hundreds of miles away from each other and you'll never actually confront them face-to-face about it. However these people are being very stupid, it would be very easy to trace these people should you want to and everything they write or text can be held indefinitely and given to the Police.
To be honest I wouldn't worry too much about the possiblity of anything actually happeneing, the guy is almost certainly just being an 'internet hard-man' and hiding behind his screen. He is being completely out of order though and just to fire a shot back, I would take everything to the Police, ask them not to do anything for now, and let the guy know through the community that the Police have all the evidence, should anyting more happen they will be instructed to deal with him.
Sounds like an absolute prat to me. But to look at it realistically, most threats from these type of people are unfounded. God knows i have had a few, and invariably nothing ever happens. Anymore though, and perhaps contact the police. Hope all goes OK
>> Edited by gbbird on Friday 20th January 09:32
>> Edited by gbbird on Friday 20th January 09:32
Have just spoken to the highest order in the group, he has been on the receiving end of some text messages, hence the fact he sent me the warpath warning. Apprently this nutter has said that if the 'boss' doesn't do something to sort me out, then he will!
He is keeping all the texts messages for me, and is making sure that the other members of the admin team are aware of it all and if they receive anything it will be passed to me.
I am going to collate it all and then go an see the police.
He is keeping all the texts messages for me, and is making sure that the other members of the admin team are aware of it all and if they receive anything it will be passed to me.
I am going to collate it all and then go an see the police.
humpbackmaniac said:
If its any help speedychick, i have a software programme that blocks texts from any numbers not in the handsets phone book. Its actually for school kids that get bullied but works well. PM if you want one.
Without software you can do this by putting all people in your phone book into a group and then setting the answer options on the group to standard while leaving your defaults settings to ignore all calls.
This does the same as the software you have humpback without adding anything new onto a phone can be done pretty quick. works on nokia's and i think motorola's nt sure on anything else dont have access to them to investigate,
only other question speedchick is how did he get your number and other details worth trying to find out how he got them, and a fire with fire campaign would not hurt to post his details somewhere now you have some, failing that i am sure there are others who could be contacted that would provide him some of his own medicine.
Piglet said:
Fighting fire with fire is absolutely the worst way of dealing with someone like this and lowering yourself to their level might be fun for a while but just continues the problem.
As already stated jerks like this are looking for your reaction, they want to know they have affected you, so I wouldn't give them one.Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff