For everyone with a daughter!!
Discussion
A couple arrive home to their 5-bedroom house in a leafy suburb. Upon entering the house, they call out for their eldest daughter, whose 18th birthday it was that day. The expected answer did not come, so the father went upstairs. He knocked and entered his daughter's bedroom and saw a letter on the bed.
With the worst possible premonition, he read with trembling hands:
Dear Mum and Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I've eloped with my new boyfriend. I've found real love and he is so nice, especially with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it is not only that, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that is one of my dreams.
I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends. They're the ones providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we could ever want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure so Ahmed gets better. He deserves it. Don't worry about money, Ahmed has arranged for me to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement.
Apparently I can earn £50 a scene and I get a £50 bonus if there are more than three men in the scene, and an extra £100 if they use a horse. Don't worry Mum, now I'm 18 years old I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter, Aimee
P.S. Dad, it's not true, I'm at a neighbours house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than denting the car. Sorry about your Mercedes.
With the worst possible premonition, he read with trembling hands:
Dear Mum and Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I've eloped with my new boyfriend. I've found real love and he is so nice, especially with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it is not only that, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that is one of my dreams.
I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends. They're the ones providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we could ever want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure so Ahmed gets better. He deserves it. Don't worry about money, Ahmed has arranged for me to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement.
Apparently I can earn £50 a scene and I get a £50 bonus if there are more than three men in the scene, and an extra £100 if they use a horse. Don't worry Mum, now I'm 18 years old I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter, Aimee
P.S. Dad, it's not true, I'm at a neighbours house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than denting the car. Sorry about your Mercedes.
Mine's not dating until she's 30. Even then, she will be chaparoned. I plan on cleaning the Glock on the kitchen table whenever she has a new friend over. If that doesn't work I'll invite her Uncle Mike (ex SEAL) over for a few beers prior to said unfortunate lad turning up...
...they'll leave skidmarks. and then they'll get in their car
ErnestM
...they'll leave skidmarks. and then they'll get in their car
ErnestM
ErnestM said:
Mine's not dating until she's 30. Even then, she will be chaparoned. I plan on cleaning the Glock on the kitchen table whenever she has a new friend over. If that doesn't work I'll invite her Uncle Mike (ex SEAL) over for a few beers prior to said unfortunate lad turning up...
...they'll leave skidmarks. and then they'll get in their car![]()
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ErnestM
Ditto.
Be a little bit fair! There are some nice guys out there!!!! I'm shaking in terror as I'm meeting my girlfriends parents in Bulgaria for the first time next week!
My girlfriend was kind enough to tell me about her fathers Colt Python and the fact that he has never liked any of her previous boyfriends (two). He also doesn't speak any English so I'm sure of awkward silences happening frequently.
Lucky I have that bottle of malt whiskey to help smooth things over later.....
I guess the good thing is her mum is nice and her little sister likes me!
My girlfriend was kind enough to tell me about her fathers Colt Python and the fact that he has never liked any of her previous boyfriends (two). He also doesn't speak any English so I'm sure of awkward silences happening frequently.
Lucky I have that bottle of malt whiskey to help smooth things over later.....
I guess the good thing is her mum is nice and her little sister likes me!
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