Silly Instructions
Discussion
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
>> Edited by m.c on Thursday 23 February 16:15
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
>> Edited by m.c on Thursday 23 February 16:15
g_attrill said:
Genuine one here, in a microwave Fisherman's Pie by (I think Sainsburys):
Contains fish
That one's fair enough though, as there is nothing in the title actually saying it has fish in it. If fisherman in your part of the world tradiotionally like nothing better than a steak pie, you'd be a bot surprised to find fish in a Fisherman's Pie.
Nevin said:
Genuine one here, in a microwave Fisherman's Pie by (I think Sainsburys):
Contains fish
That one's fair enough though, as there is nothing in the title actually saying it has fish in it. If fisherman in your part of the world tradiotionally like nothing better than a steak pie, you'd be a bot surprised to find fish in a Fisherman's Pie.
It's true. You don't find shepherds in a Shepherd's Pie, and I can't say I've ever found a cottage in a Cottage Pie.
I did always wonder about Four 'N' 20 Pies in Australia though...
flat_steve said:
On any packet of nuts:
Warning may contain traces of nutsWTF
Bizarrely, peanuts are not nuts, or something.
Yup. Peanuts are legumes apparently, but are prepared near other nuts. So people may have an nut allergy but not to peanuts, hence the need for a warning.
Mind you, if I had a nut allergy I think I'd be avoiding peanuts anyway.
flat_steve said:
On any packet of nuts:
Warning may contain traces of nuts
Bizarrely, peanuts are not nuts, or something.
Yup. Peanuts are legumes apparently, but are prepared near other nuts. So people may have an nut allergy but not to peanuts, hence the need for a warning.
Mind you, if I had a nut allergy I think I'd be avoiding peanuts anyway.
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