Valentines' Day again - stick to your guns, chaps.
Discussion
Valentines’ Day. For two blissful years I have had nothing better to do on this foul date than go out and get hammered, and go on the hunt. This year, that comes crashing to an end and once again I find myself having to make that effort. Or so I thought.
I overheard the other half on the phone to her mother on Saturday morning. The Mum is expressing disappointment at hubby’s refusal to pander to the crass commercialisation of Valentine’s day and take her out for dinner. Girlfriend was responding by laughing at her mother, stating that she agrees with Pa– V-Day is rubbish, cheesy and a waste of time and money.
Imagine my delight. I am a very, very lucky man. Now, she doesn’t know that I overheard her true feelings on the subject, and I am taking the gamble – no cards, no chocolates, no flowers, no cheesiness. On our first Valentines’ day together, I intend to read her mind. Nothing says ‘I love you’ like, well, nothing.
Am I:
a) going to appear to be her true soulmate, united in despising this foul, pink satin-laden travesty of a day, or
b) going to die horribly?
Who knows. That said, I have hedged my bets a little and sent her an e-card from the selection below. Specifically, the last one on the list. Chaps, they are great cards – I suggest you fill your boots.
www.meish.org/vd/
I overheard the other half on the phone to her mother on Saturday morning. The Mum is expressing disappointment at hubby’s refusal to pander to the crass commercialisation of Valentine’s day and take her out for dinner. Girlfriend was responding by laughing at her mother, stating that she agrees with Pa– V-Day is rubbish, cheesy and a waste of time and money.
Imagine my delight. I am a very, very lucky man. Now, she doesn’t know that I overheard her true feelings on the subject, and I am taking the gamble – no cards, no chocolates, no flowers, no cheesiness. On our first Valentines’ day together, I intend to read her mind. Nothing says ‘I love you’ like, well, nothing.
Am I:
a) going to appear to be her true soulmate, united in despising this foul, pink satin-laden travesty of a day, or
b) going to die horribly?
Who knows. That said, I have hedged my bets a little and sent her an e-card from the selection below. Specifically, the last one on the list. Chaps, they are great cards – I suggest you fill your boots.
www.meish.org/vd/
Absolutely fan-bloody-tastic!!
Being a 'bint' I would be happy to receive that - Mr E take note, you wanted an anti schmaltzy card to send..............
We're going out for a curry in a big group as an anti valentines. I can't say if I've bought him indoors a pressie or not as he reads this so I'll keep schtum.
He did go looking for a card the other day, but with a broken arm he can't drive and the local corner tescos was rubbish, so I rather think you've sorted him out
Being a 'bint' I would be happy to receive that - Mr E take note, you wanted an anti schmaltzy card to send..............
We're going out for a curry in a big group as an anti valentines. I can't say if I've bought him indoors a pressie or not as he reads this so I'll keep schtum.
He did go looking for a card the other day, but with a broken arm he can't drive and the local corner tescos was rubbish, so I rather think you've sorted him out
Not sure... even if she on the phone to her mun, screaming 'Valentines day sucks cocks in hell' and projectile vomiting around the room...
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray (you might want to sub a pack of condoms - or a cinema ticket - you do go to the cinema? instead of the girly flower).
Then open your Tennants Super, and get your arse down to the pub...!! Job done...
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray (you might want to sub a pack of condoms - or a cinema ticket - you do go to the cinema? instead of the girly flower).
Then open your Tennants Super, and get your arse down to the pub...!! Job done...
scruffy said:
Not sure... even if she on the phone to her mun, screaming 'Valentines day sucks cocks in hell' and projectile vomiting around the room...
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray
kirsty5150 said:
scruffy said:
Not sure... even if she on the phone to her mun, screaming 'Valentines day sucks cocks in hell' and projectile vomiting around the room...
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray
She's still half expecting something
You don't have to do much - a little secret shop tonight, just make her a nice breakfast, find an orchid or something for the breakfast tray
No way. I'm sticking to my guns, chaps. A man has to stand by his principles.
Harry Flashman said:
Girlfriend was responding by laughing at her mother, stating that she agrees with Pa– V-Day is rubbish, cheesy and a waste of time and money.
Run for your lives!!! It's a trap! You've been ambushed by an expert!
Yes, it's cheesy, expensive, over commercialised crap. But I'd still be wearing my balls for ear-rings if I didn't make the effort to get something schmaltzy, red & flower shaped delivered to her work tomorrow...
Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff