The internet needs a Beaufort Scale
Discussion
Now, I like seeing someone fall over as much as the next guy, but I REALLY hate seeing people doing themselves a serious mischief.
Someone needs to come up with a kind of Beaufort Scale for internet 'funnies' so slightly wussy people like me can avoid really nasty videos (like that chav getting his leg crushed by that concrete wall), but still enjoy things like that biker stoppying into the back of that car.
See here for the Beaufort Scale: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beaufort_Scale
My Internet Beaufort Scale:
1. No injuries at all. Subject of video seen getting up after 'incident'. Probably laughing.
2. No visible injury. Subject of video struggles to get up after incident, but still movement. Possibly some laughing.
3. No visible injury. Subject clearly in a bit of pain, but still movement.
4. No visible injury. Subject clearly in some pain, very little movement.
5. Injury visible. Small cut, some blood. No trip to hospital necessary.
6. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small fire. No trip to hospital necessary.
7. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small-medium sized fire. Trip to A&E possible, no need for Ambulance.
8. Fairly severe injury. Broken bone a strong possibility given severity of impact. Trip to A&E a certainty, no need for Ambulance.
9. Severe injury. Broken bone a certainty and visible on video (limp arm, for example). Trip to A&E a certainty, Ambulance a possibility.
10. Very severe injury. Severity obvious on video (foot or leg facing the wrong way). Subject clearly in a lot of pain. Ambulance a certainty.
11. Extremely severe injury. Large fall, lots of blood, possibly a serious flesh wound or serious bone breakage (bone through skin etc). Ambulance a certainty, survival not a certainty.
12. Anything involving a death, or an injury that will almost certainly result in death, or any kind of prolonged and serious suffering for the subject, such as a large fire.
ETA: 2,500 posts. Woot.
Someone needs to come up with a kind of Beaufort Scale for internet 'funnies' so slightly wussy people like me can avoid really nasty videos (like that chav getting his leg crushed by that concrete wall), but still enjoy things like that biker stoppying into the back of that car.
See here for the Beaufort Scale: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beaufort_Scale
My Internet Beaufort Scale:
1. No injuries at all. Subject of video seen getting up after 'incident'. Probably laughing.
2. No visible injury. Subject of video struggles to get up after incident, but still movement. Possibly some laughing.
3. No visible injury. Subject clearly in a bit of pain, but still movement.
4. No visible injury. Subject clearly in some pain, very little movement.
5. Injury visible. Small cut, some blood. No trip to hospital necessary.
6. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small fire. No trip to hospital necessary.
7. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small-medium sized fire. Trip to A&E possible, no need for Ambulance.
8. Fairly severe injury. Broken bone a strong possibility given severity of impact. Trip to A&E a certainty, no need for Ambulance.
9. Severe injury. Broken bone a certainty and visible on video (limp arm, for example). Trip to A&E a certainty, Ambulance a possibility.
10. Very severe injury. Severity obvious on video (foot or leg facing the wrong way). Subject clearly in a lot of pain. Ambulance a certainty.
11. Extremely severe injury. Large fall, lots of blood, possibly a serious flesh wound or serious bone breakage (bone through skin etc). Ambulance a certainty, survival not a certainty.
12. Anything involving a death, or an injury that will almost certainly result in death, or any kind of prolonged and serious suffering for the subject, such as a large fire.
ETA: 2,500 posts. Woot.
Edited by MrKipling43 on Tuesday 12th August 14:19
it's kind of cool when you know it's nasty though. You kind of analyse the situation (like in Casualty) trying to figure out what will go wrong 
e.g there's a man washing the windows on a block of flats with a spiked railing beneath him, you expect him to topple and land on the railing, but instead he'll get hit by a russian space station falling from orbit
e.g there's a man washing the windows on a block of flats with a spiked railing beneath him, you expect him to topple and land on the railing, but instead he'll get hit by a russian space station falling from orbit
Monki said:
it's kind of cool when you know it's nasty though. You kind of analyse the situation (like in Casualty) trying to figure out what will go wrong
e.g there's a man washing the windows on a block of flats with a spiked railing beneath him, you expect him to topple and land on the railing, but instead he'll get hit by a russian space station falling from orbit
Oh, you play the Casualty "Spot the accident" game too, do you?e.g there's a man washing the windows on a block of flats with a spiked railing beneath him, you expect him to topple and land on the railing, but instead he'll get hit by a russian space station falling from orbit
MrKipling43 said:
Now, I like seeing someone fall over as much as the next guy, but I REALLY hate seeing people doing themselves a serious mischief.
Someone needs to come up with a kind of Beaufort Scale for internet 'funnies' so slightly wussy people like me can avoid really nasty videos (like that chav getting his leg crushed by that concrete wall), but still enjoy things like that biker stoppying into the back of that car.
See here for the Beaufort Scale: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beaufort_Scale
My Internet Beaufort Scale:
1. No injuries at all. Subject of video seen getting up after 'incident'. Probably laughing.
2. No visible injury. Subject of video struggles to get up after incident, but still movement. Possibly some laughing.
3. No visible injury. Subject clearly in a bit of pain, but still movement.
4. No visible injury. Subject clearly in some pain, very little movement.
5. Injury visible. Small cut, some blood. No trip to hospital necessary.
6. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small fire. No trip to hospital necessary.
7. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small-medium sized fire. Trip to A&E possible, no need for Ambulance.
8. Fairly severe injury. Broken bone a strong possibility given severity of impact. Trip to A&E a certainty, no need for Ambulance.
9. Severe injury. Broken bone a certainty and visible on video (limp arm, for example). Trip to A&E a certainty, Ambulance a possibility.
10. Very severe injury. Severity obvious on video (foot or leg facing the wrong way). Subject clearly in a lot of pain. Ambulance a certainty.
11. Extremely severe injury. Large fall, lots of blood, possibly a serious flesh wound or serious bone breakage (bone through skin etc). Ambulance a certainty, survival not a certainty.
12. Anything involving a death, or an injury that will almost certainly result in death, or any kind of prolonged and serious suffering for the subject, such as a large fire.
ETA: 2,500 posts. Woot.
I like your style, but have an issue with number 4.Someone needs to come up with a kind of Beaufort Scale for internet 'funnies' so slightly wussy people like me can avoid really nasty videos (like that chav getting his leg crushed by that concrete wall), but still enjoy things like that biker stoppying into the back of that car.
See here for the Beaufort Scale: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beaufort_Scale
My Internet Beaufort Scale:
1. No injuries at all. Subject of video seen getting up after 'incident'. Probably laughing.
2. No visible injury. Subject of video struggles to get up after incident, but still movement. Possibly some laughing.
3. No visible injury. Subject clearly in a bit of pain, but still movement.
4. No visible injury. Subject clearly in some pain, very little movement.
5. Injury visible. Small cut, some blood. No trip to hospital necessary.
6. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small fire. No trip to hospital necessary.
7. Slightly more severe injury. Larger cuts, more blood, some involvement of a small-medium sized fire. Trip to A&E possible, no need for Ambulance.
8. Fairly severe injury. Broken bone a strong possibility given severity of impact. Trip to A&E a certainty, no need for Ambulance.
9. Severe injury. Broken bone a certainty and visible on video (limp arm, for example). Trip to A&E a certainty, Ambulance a possibility.
10. Very severe injury. Severity obvious on video (foot or leg facing the wrong way). Subject clearly in a lot of pain. Ambulance a certainty.
11. Extremely severe injury. Large fall, lots of blood, possibly a serious flesh wound or serious bone breakage (bone through skin etc). Ambulance a certainty, survival not a certainty.
12. Anything involving a death, or an injury that will almost certainly result in death, or any kind of prolonged and serious suffering for the subject, such as a large fire.
ETA: 2,500 posts. Woot.
Edited by MrKipling43 on Tuesday 12th August 14:19
"Very little movement" seems more serious than number 5, "small cut".
Monki said:
oh yep, sadly I am usually wrong. I always have a "mousetrap" style theory which is too far fetched even for a tv drama 
It's usually a gang of teenagers driving to a party somewhere, who crash and burn, or a divorced Dad who has to fix the guttering (up a rickety ladder) before he goes to his daughter's Birthday, with the obligatory spikey fence below.Or some horrific power-tool accident. Or a drowning. Or something.
They're so easy to spot.
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