OParanoid or worrying early signs?

[Brown and Boris]

A friend of Mrs B&B has announced her engagement this week. The husband to be seems Ok, runs his own web hosting company. She is second time around, he is single. 40's and until recently lived with his agrophobic mother (in the Norman Bates style).

Anyway, this week she has also changed her email address to run through his servers at his suggstion. Mrs BandB was a bit concerned that her girlie chats on the email were now available for him to view, and that he had suggested the move, and couldn't see what the advanatge was of having emails runing through his servers for the odd email for personal use (she has email at work anywayand only uses the personal email for personal stuff as her work don't like personal emails on the PC).

What are the benefits of shifting to his servers other than a prep for a wife stabbing spree?

Mrs B and B has got all paranoid about it as often when the girls makes plans for a girls night out he comes up with something to cut across it, such as an offer to take her away for the weekend or go out to a restaurant. It may all be genuine, but she feels it is too much of a coincidence and that he may not like her going, is seeing her emails and be making arrangemnets to stop her going out. Mrs B and B is convinced he is trying to keep tabs on her and now he can see her emails with ease.

So, dopey and paranoid woman or the first signs of a bunny boiler husband?

Edited by Brown and Boris on Wednesday 10th December 12:00

[Timsta]

Could easily be either. My wife's emails go through my server, as do the kids. As well as other family members who have moved their domains over to my servers.

The upside is that I can set mail sizes, and not be restricted by crap service.

[Crusoe]

could be innocent (why pay for a provider when i'll sign you up for free) probably depend how big the business was, if it was quite small and he was hands on with the technical side then I'd be a bit worried. Larger business he was the manager of then he might not even deal with that side of it or know how it works.

Edited by Crusoe on Wednesday 10th December 12:03

[dundarach]

Yes alarm bells should be ringing by now...

[ChristianZS]

He can view all the E-Mails.


That is all.

[Mc Lovin]

this sounds familiar

[GreenDog]

He's a nutter - a certified head-case. Definitely.

[illmonkey]

Get her to email some pretend bloke about meeting up. If hes looking he'll mention it, or kill her.

Either way, she'll know if he was snooping.

[Ahhh Moneypenny]

bunny boiler for sure, or control freak
IMO of course!

[merc_man]

He'll have already infected your OHs mails with malware and is likely spying on YOU right now as you type.

Wait, is that a knocking at your door. Oh my god, it's a man with a gimp mask.

[KK_]

First signs of a possessive husband.

[Landlord]

I guess the question is, does she have stuff on the personal emails that she wouldn't want her husband to see. If so, why? I'd have thought a basic premise for the marriage should be trust and, therefore, no secrets.

And I don't buy the old "I was sworn to secrecy about my mate Glenda's massive flaps" rubbish. All girlie secrets should be sharable with your beloved.

So - in essence, I think that perhaps the husbands motives are slightly nefarious, however, if she's nothing to hide, it become moot.

[elle]

Sounds like a control freak.

Is she blinded by love/lust/money/commitment?

[Crusoe]

KK_ said:

First signs of a possessive husband.

or a nice guy who thought he could easily save his gf £20 a month or whatever she is paying now for internet access.

[KK_]

Crusoe said:

KK_ said:

First signs of a possessive husband.

or a nice guy who thought he could easily save his gf £20 a month or whatever she is paying now for internet access.

I thought so too, at first.

Brown and Boris said:

Mrs B and B has got all paranoid about it as often when the girls makes plans for a girls night out he comes up with something to cut across it, such as an offer to take her away for the weekend or go out to a restaurant.

Until I read that.

[JJCW]

Discuss places she'd like to visit, activities she'd like to do on email - see if he suggests them. Dinners she'd like to have, all sorts.

Suggest to her on email that a 3-some would be fun, but that both would be too nervous to suggest it to him, but that it would be amazing if he suggested it. Give opportunity for him to do so...

Should be obvious as to whether he is reading in

Edited by JJCW on Wednesday 10th December 12:16

[Mr POD]

Have she heard of using the phone ?

My misses has never used email.

[elle]

Crusoe said:

KK_ said:

First signs of a possessive husband.

or a nice guy who thought he could easily save his gf £20 a month or whatever she is paying now for internet access.

Brown and Boris said:

he is single. 40's and until recently lived with his agrophobic mother in the Norman Bates style
.

[PhantomHumper]

KK_ said:

Crusoe said:

KK_ said:

First signs of a possessive husband.

or a nice guy who thought he could easily save his gf £20 a month or whatever she is paying now for internet access.

I thought so too, at first.

Brown and Boris said:

Mrs B and B has got all paranoid about it as often when the girls makes plans for a girls night out he comes up with something to cut across it, such as an offer to take her away for the weekend or go out to a restaurant.

Until I read that.

A man wants to spend time with his wife to be? What a dhead, kill him before it's too late

She is probably only marrying him because he does nice things like weekends away/dinner etc

[Don]

Timsta said:

Could easily be either. My wife's emails go through my server, as do the kids. As well as other family members who have moved their domains over to my servers.

The upside is that I can set mail sizes, and not be restricted by crap service.

My wife's email goes through my firm's servers - since I own the firm and am the email Admin I can do stuff like that. It's convenient.

No bunny boiling required.

Give the guy a break. He's probably a decent sort who's trying to save her some money.