Collection Of The Worst/Best Christmas Cracker Jokes

[mr_krissy_kris]

Just wondering about the quality of PH crackers this year. Post your worst or even the best jokes you had in your crackers.

What does a policeman have in his sandwiches?
Truncheon Meat :|

[Penny-lope]

Not even pulled mine yet

and 'ohhhhhhh' for the first joke

Edited by Penny-lope on Thursday 25th December 17:06

[DAVEVO9]

We have some Ken Bigley Christmas crackers.. They don't have any hats in them.

[TWSTEEL]

Continuing the theme
Where do policemen live?













Letsby Avenue

[mr_krissy_kris]

TWSTEEL said:

Continuing the theme
Where do policemen live?













Letsby Avenue

Haha like it!

[Trevelyan]

What do you call a train full of toffees?





A chew-chew train...

I thank you. I'm here all week.

[Killer2005]

What do you call a man with a paper bag on his head?








Russel

[mr_krissy_kris]

Just popped the last cracker. It's a beaut.....

What do you call four matadors in quicksand?




Quatro sinko.

[D14 AYS]

How did the cannonball lose his job ?...................................He was fired

[V8mate]

Why was Santa's helper depressed?



Because he had low elf esteem.

[mr_krissy_kris]

V8mate said:

Why was Santa's helper depressed?



Because he had low elf esteem.

OH said "Awwww" :P

[aciddrop616]

How did the fairy atop the Christmas tree originate???




When the fairy asked santa where to put the tree whilst santa was having a very bad day.

[Gun]

In my cracker:

What does an auctioneer know?





Lots and lots.

[HOGEPH]

What do you call a man with a spade in his head?

An ambulance, he may have a fractured skull.

[mically]

TWSTEEL said:

Continuing the theme
Where do policemen live?



Letsby Avenue

That's where South Yorkshire Police have their 'copper chopper' based. Letsby Avenue, at the sheffield airport business park.

don't be fooled however, the airport is nay more! just a mere training ground for helicopter pilot wannabe's