Cliff Richard calendar in work kitchen
Discussion
For some reason, someone has put a Cliff Richard calender up in our work kitchen. I assume its an unwanted present. But its still deeply offensive to me.
People have started writing things in for certain days, birthdays etc. It seems to be becoming a permanent fixture.
I too am tempted to write in something.
Such as 'Jan 24th -gouge out Cliff's eyes with broken bottle & squirt lemon juice in holes'.
What other suggestions?
People have started writing things in for certain days, birthdays etc. It seems to be becoming a permanent fixture.
I too am tempted to write in something.
Such as 'Jan 24th -gouge out Cliff's eyes with broken bottle & squirt lemon juice in holes'.
What other suggestions?
Why not try and guess the date of Cliff's death/funeral?
Or find out Cliff's birthday and draw a picture of an erect penis, or the gay "symbol" (you know two of those crosses under a circle) on that date - make it look like it was printed, not drawn.
Or find out Cliff's birthday and draw a picture of an erect penis, or the gay "symbol" (you know two of those crosses under a circle) on that date - make it look like it was printed, not drawn.
Edited by Landlord on Wednesday 7th January 15:05
captainzep said:
For some reason, someone has put a Cliff Richard calender up in our work kitchen. I assume its an unwanted present. But its still deeply offensive to me.
People have started writing things in for certain days, birthdays etc. It seems to be becoming a permanent fixture.
I too am tempted to write in something.
Such as 'Jan 24th -gouge out Cliff's eyes with broken bottle & squirt lemon juice in holes'.
What other suggestions?
That should be a sackable offence!People have started writing things in for certain days, birthdays etc. It seems to be becoming a permanent fixture.
I too am tempted to write in something.
Such as 'Jan 24th -gouge out Cliff's eyes with broken bottle & squirt lemon juice in holes'.
What other suggestions?
Stay 15 minutes late tonight, remove calendar & take it home & enjoy the warmth it will generate as you incinerate it & warm your toes in front of the fire with a cold beer at hand !

However, before you do this as a token of atonement, go and buy either
a) A sun Page three calendar or
b) A the dullest Sasco wall chart you can find
and hang one (or both) on the wall in its place (as appropriate) before you remove the offensive item from the office !!

Iain328 said:
dougc said:
Block out a couple of weeks in June and write 'crooning embarrassingly in the rain at a tennis tournament'
No longer - they put a sliding roof over the bat & ball pitch now! Cliffs been Credit Crunch'd & he's out of a job!
mybrainhurts said:
Iain328 said:
dougc said:
Block out a couple of weeks in June and write 'crooning embarrassingly in the rain at a tennis tournament'
No longer - they put a sliding roof over the bat & ball pitch now! Cliffs been Credit Crunch'd & he's out of a job!
Iain328 said:
mybrainhurts said:
Iain328 said:
dougc said:
Block out a couple of weeks in June and write 'crooning embarrassingly in the rain at a tennis tournament'
No longer - they put a sliding roof over the bat & ball pitch now! Cliffs been Credit Crunch'd & he's out of a job!
I'll make the bugger swing...

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