The merits and taste of decorating graves; discuss.

[Rubin215]

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

[rpguk]

Fortunately I don't have to decorate any grave, but I don't see any problem with it myself. I do however recognise that some might and think that cemeteries should be able to make a decision (of course done with tact)

I've seen some of the graves put up by travelers in Ireland though and they are quite a site!

[V8mate]

rpguk said:

I've seen some of the graves put up by travelers in Ireland though and they are quite a site!

Whereas most of their sites are quite a sight.

[Scraggles]

local council banned all the tat, but have seen some really naff sites, filled with mouldy teddy bears that blow all over the place

[308mate]

Does this not render the petition thread pointless?

Or do you post there just to say "thats terrible and Ive signed"? And if you can do that, why cant you say "Its not that terrible, I didnt sign"?

Or do we have seperate threads now for dissenters?

[deevlash]

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

why? who are you to decide who posts where on pistonheads? Idiot.

[V8mate]

308mate said:

Does this not render the petition thread pointless?

Or do you post there just to say "thats terrible and Ive signed"? And if you can do that, why cant you say "Its not that terrible, I didnt sign"?

Or do we have seperate threads now for dissenters?

Apparently, if you disagree with any OP, you're not allowed to say so, you have to go and start another thread.

Maybe we should have a new section which offers counselling...

If you were upset by any part of this thread, please join the PH social workers group for some group hugging and support

[grumbledoak]

I can understand that older mourners don't want reminders of life (or marriage, seemingly), though I don't agree with them. And, I understand that burying a child is going to be a complete mind-fk for any parent.

The council should just put a hedge around the babies' cemetery, and let people do what they need to do; I'm quite sure every visiting parent would understand. As it stands, the council's actions are gutless, stupid, and shameful.

[miniman]

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

[Oakey]

grumbledoak said:

I can understand that older mourners don't want reminders of life (or marriage, seemingly), though I don't agree with them. And, I understand that burying a child is going to be a complete mind-fk for any parent.

The council should just put a hedge around the babies' cemetery, and let people do what they need to do; I'm quite sure every visiting parent would understand. As it stands, the council's actions are gutless, stupid, and shameful.

you're assuming eery parent wants to do this to their childs grave. What about those who don't? What about those who don't want to be surrounded by tat?

Perhaps we could have two plots? Those who want to be traditional, and those who want tat.

If we could also get those who like to light their houses up like Las Vegas every Xmas into their own area too I think we're on to a winner.

[Alfa_75_Steve]

miniman said:

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

Because the professional mourners on the other thread don't want nasty infidels who are on a path to hell to post on their cuddly thread.

[davido140]

personally I'm all for freedom of choice.

I'm more of a well tended tasteful headstone/plot rather than a bucket load of toys/decorations person.

However, if the nearest and dearest of the departed want to leave trinkets and other bits and bobs by the grave then they should bloody well be allowed to.

Why not have a graveyard with different "areas", or perhaps we should be getting the choice of no-trinkets and trinkets graveyards?

are they still called graveyards?

ETA, I know many arent lucky enough to get the choice, but you wont find me or any of my relatives being buried in any place where a "council" has a say over what is done with the grave.

Add to that, if any fker (especially council) decides to move me, fk with my headstone etc you can bet your balls I'll be coming back to haunt them!

Edited by davido140 on Monday 12th January 18:33

[voyds9]

Why should babies be treated different to anyone else.

Would it be ok to decorate a 10 year olds grave, what about a teenagers who died in his first car.

More to the point what about a parent that lost a baby and wants a serene area only to assaulted by mouldy teddies.

Perhaps we should just half a dozen different areas and you can choose where to be buried.

[308mate]

Alfa_75_Steve said:

miniman said:

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

Because the professional mourners on the other thread don't want nasty infidels who are on a path to hell to post on their cuddly thread.

Aye.

Some folks arent happy unless theyre adding a heartfelt "RIP" to 3 threads a day, all about complete strangers. Maybe there is an index of active death threads somewhere and you can just visit each one and express your anguish.

[davido140]

308mate said:

Alfa_75_Steve said:

miniman said:

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

Because the professional mourners on the other thread don't want nasty infidels who are on a path to hell to post on their cuddly thread.

Aye.

Some folks arent happy unless theyre adding a heartfelt "RIP" to 3 threads a day, all about complete strangers. Maybe there is an index of active death threads somewhere and you can just visit each one and express your anguish.

I signed the petition, didnt leave any RIPs or otherwise (personally I fking hate the word/acronym/expression/whatever you want to call it) I didnt know the child or the parents.

I do however object to council & gubberment meddling in all forms.

[V8mate]

davido140 said:

308mate said:

Alfa_75_Steve said:

miniman said:

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

Because the professional mourners on the other thread don't want nasty infidels who are on a path to hell to post on their cuddly thread.

Aye.

Some folks arent happy unless theyre adding a heartfelt "RIP" to 3 threads a day, all about complete strangers. Maybe there is an index of active death threads somewhere and you can just visit each one and express your anguish.

I signed the petition, didnt leave any RIPs or otherwise (personally I fking hate the word/acronym/expression/whatever you want to call it) I didnt know the child or the parents.

I do however object to council & gubberment meddling in all forms.

How are they meddling? It's the Council's bl00dy land!

[Oakey]

davido140 said:

308mate said:

Alfa_75_Steve said:

miniman said:

Rubin215 said:

So please hold your discussion here and not on the babies graves petition thread.

Why do we need a new thread, when the 18-page other thread is doing just fine?

Because the professional mourners on the other thread don't want nasty infidels who are on a path to hell to post on their cuddly thread.

Aye.

Some folks arent happy unless theyre adding a heartfelt "RIP" to 3 threads a day, all about complete strangers. Maybe there is an index of active death threads somewhere and you can just visit each one and express your anguish.

I signed the petition, didnt leave any RIPs or otherwise (personally I fking hate the word/acronym/expression/whatever you want to call it) I didnt know the child or the parents.

I do however object to council & gubberment meddling in all forms.

So you're just doing it so you can 'stick it to the man'?

I disagree with the tat because it simply looks terrible and it's just one more step forward for the chav society we're being over-run by. Sometimes we need to put our foot down.

I keep seeing people say "people should be allowed to grieve how they want" but this isn't some centuries old tradition. this is relatively new (it probably goes hand in hand with the rise of chav culture) and people seemed to manage to grieve just fine before that first 'bright' spark decided they were going to adorn their childs grave with tasteless tat.

[mechsympathy]

davido140 said:

Why not have a graveyard with different "areas", or perhaps we should be getting the choice of no-trinkets and trinkets graveyards?

What if you have an epiphany a few weeks after the funeral and want to change areas?

And unfortunately a hedge might hide the plot from onlookers in the rest of the cemetery, but it'd also hide vandals/druggies etc.

[Ian V]

I don,t understand what right anyone has to tell someone what they can or can't have on a loved ones grave. After all the 'plots' are paid for by the family / deceased and therefore it should be up to them to decide what happens on it.

One of my Uncles died of cancer last year, his wife wanted to have an engraving of his beloved Morris Minor on the headstone. Guess what, the powers that be (in case the local vicar) said no way. I,m afraid I,d have done it anyway and f*ck them !

[V8mate]

Ian V said:

I don,t understand what right anyone has to tell someone what they can or can't have on a loved ones grave. After all the 'plots' are paid for by the family / deceased and therefore it should be up to them to decide what happens on it.

One of my Uncles died of cancer last year, his wife wanted to have an engraving of his beloved Morris Minor on the headstone. Guess what, the powers that be (in case the local vicar) said no way. I,m afraid I,d have done it anyway and f*ck them !

Your payment leases the plot; it's not a freehold.