Lending A Friend Money
Discussion
I know things like this have been discussed in the past but would like people's opinions as of now.
So here's the story.
Lent a colleague / friend £600 for a holiday in September on the agreement he would pay back £100 per month. He then proposed to pay me outright for whole amount from the bonus we receive in March's pay. I agreed because it didn't really matter to me when I got the money back.
Our bonus now looks unlikely due to the current economic climate. He said if we don't get anything I'll pay you back monthly (£100 per month), starting with April. That takes the re-payments up until the end of the year which is ridiculous.
Now comes the problem, his financial situation has always been patchy and he is in a fair amount of debt. Our company is also 'streamlining' and I am fully aware that if he gets laid off I will most likely never see him or my money again.
To make things a little worse when asking for it, I don't need the money and he knows it. He struggles to get through the month although splashes out alot taking girls out every weekend, wild nights out etc.
What would you do?
Please don't flame me or say you shouldn't have lent him the money. What's done is done...
Cheers.
So here's the story.
Lent a colleague / friend £600 for a holiday in September on the agreement he would pay back £100 per month. He then proposed to pay me outright for whole amount from the bonus we receive in March's pay. I agreed because it didn't really matter to me when I got the money back.
Our bonus now looks unlikely due to the current economic climate. He said if we don't get anything I'll pay you back monthly (£100 per month), starting with April. That takes the re-payments up until the end of the year which is ridiculous.
Now comes the problem, his financial situation has always been patchy and he is in a fair amount of debt. Our company is also 'streamlining' and I am fully aware that if he gets laid off I will most likely never see him or my money again.
To make things a little worse when asking for it, I don't need the money and he knows it. He struggles to get through the month although splashes out alot taking girls out every weekend, wild nights out etc.
What would you do?
Please don't flame me or say you shouldn't have lent him the money. What's done is done...
Cheers.
It would only be the case of if he lost his job I know he wouldn't be able to face me, knowing he couldn't pay me back.
Either way, this is about getting my money back, not what constitutes a friend. While he is here, I feel like he will pay me back due to the reputation that he would get if he fobbed me off.
Either way, this is about getting my money back, not what constitutes a friend. While he is here, I feel like he will pay me back due to the reputation that he would get if he fobbed me off.
i'd struggle to lend a friend money for a holiday.. if he was about to be ejected from his home then i'd help out as best as i could, but like you say - what's done is done.
What i did (yes, i've done it twice now
) is write off the money. It's gone now i'm afraid. Whatever you get back from here is a bonus.
Is he a colleague or a friend? If colleague then i would ask him to sort out a standing order - it shows their commitment. If they don't do it or "it didn't work for some reason" then i doubt you'll be seeing your money again. Unless you're bigger than him.
What i did (yes, i've done it twice now
) is write off the money. It's gone now i'm afraid. Whatever you get back from here is a bonus.Is he a colleague or a friend? If colleague then i would ask him to sort out a standing order - it shows their commitment. If they don't do it or "it didn't work for some reason" then i doubt you'll be seeing your money again. Unless you're bigger than him.
jimothy said:
Sometimes its easier to write these things off.
My view on lending money to friends is I never do it. I will give them money, and if they pay it back its a bonus. But I'll only give money to the people I know will try to pay it back.
I'm going to employ this from now on.My view on lending money to friends is I never do it. I will give them money, and if they pay it back its a bonus. But I'll only give money to the people I know will try to pay it back.
Makes perfect sense now.
What would I do? Take the £100 a month for as long as it lasts and if he does get the bullet, write the balance off.
A "friend" of mine took me for £2500 15 years ago. I lost my money, he lost his self respect when his fiancé saw me in a pub, asked me why I never spoke to ex-mate any more, I told her and she offered to repay me from her own savings.
I declined, saying if he really wanted to pay me back, he would do.
They did not marry.
A "friend" of mine took me for £2500 15 years ago. I lost my money, he lost his self respect when his fiancé saw me in a pub, asked me why I never spoke to ex-mate any more, I told her and she offered to repay me from her own savings.
I declined, saying if he really wanted to pay me back, he would do.
They did not marry.
DoubleYellow said:
It would only be the case of if he lost his job I know he wouldn't be able to face me, knowing he couldn't pay me back.
Either way, this is about getting my money back, not what constitutes a friend. While he is here, I feel like he will pay me back due to the reputation that he would get if he fobbed me off.
But... it does seem (to me at least) that he IS fobbing you off TBH.Either way, this is about getting my money back, not what constitutes a friend. While he is here, I feel like he will pay me back due to the reputation that he would get if he fobbed me off.
Just politely.
People are pisstakers and this may well be one of those times you just have to take it on the chin and write the money off.
I'd slap him whatever.
I am in a similar situation.
I lent a friend £1500 in Nov 2007 and up until now he has not paid me back a single penny.
Despite the fact that when I lent him the money a cheque was not good enough he needed cash then and there and an agreement to pay me back over 12 months.
It may be time to call it in.
I lent a friend £1500 in Nov 2007 and up until now he has not paid me back a single penny.
Despite the fact that when I lent him the money a cheque was not good enough he needed cash then and there and an agreement to pay me back over 12 months.
It may be time to call it in.
Edited by R1_NUR on Tuesday 3rd February 12:23
I've had 'friends' like him. Including one who I sold something to for £20. "I'll pay you next week" he said, and kept saying for so for over 6 months! Same guy bought a £200k house outright during the same period, he is no longer a 'friend'.
He sounds like a total freeloader, owing money to friends and still taking girls on 'wild nights out' is not only insensitive, it's taking the piss.
You won't get the money back, he'll make excuse after excuse until you give up.
HTH
He sounds like a total freeloader, owing money to friends and still taking girls on 'wild nights out' is not only insensitive, it's taking the piss.
You won't get the money back, he'll make excuse after excuse until you give up.
HTH
jimothy said:
Sometimes its easier to write these things off.
My view on lending money to friends is I never do it. I will give them money, and if they pay it back its a bonus. But I'll only give money to the people I know will try to pay it back.
It does save time and trouble just to write these things off but not without a little nudging first. You will be doing him a disservice, as well as yourself, if you let him off without a bit of pushing. My view on lending money to friends is I never do it. I will give them money, and if they pay it back its a bonus. But I'll only give money to the people I know will try to pay it back.
Slightly different story if it had been for his rent because he had had his week's wages mugged off him, but in this case the bloke is partying with YOUR MONEY.
I think you’ve answered your question in the OP. His financial situation is (was) precarious, so when you lent him the cash I think you already knew the chances of recovery… It was your call, so I have to assume you knew what you were doing.
Having said that and assuming that you are not embarrassed to discuss, ask him to raise a Standing Order (£100/mth) to be withdrawn on the day you (and by assumption his) pay day. That way, at least you have a fighting chance of getting some of it back, before he pisses his monthly income away on more wild nights out …
HTH
R1_NUR said:
Despite the fact that when I lent him the money a cheque was not good enough he needed cash then and there
The reason they (so called "friends" who borrow money and won't pay it back) don't want a cheque is so that there's no evidence that you lent them the money in the first place.I am still owed £600 from a 'friend' I lent to over 6 years ago. It is the first and last time I will ever lend to friends or family.
I recently spoke to this old friend and gently reminded him of the debt. He claimed to have completely forgotten about it, apologised and said he would send the money immediately, that was over six months ago.
I have written the debt off and learnt a hard lesson.
BTW, my 'friend' has two houses and two businesses and drives a Porsche, which does make him a cock!
I recently spoke to this old friend and gently reminded him of the debt. He claimed to have completely forgotten about it, apologised and said he would send the money immediately, that was over six months ago.
I have written the debt off and learnt a hard lesson.
BTW, my 'friend' has two houses and two businesses and drives a Porsche, which does make him a cock!
Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff