PH advice needed please
PH advice needed please
Author
Discussion

Bonnie and Clyde

Original Poster:

11,701 posts

221 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Ok here we go. I have a passion for going to car shows, 1/4 mile Drag strips and V8 car meets which "i guess" is totally acceptable. The only problem i have is that my OH doesn't share the same enthusiasm as i do. Dont get me wrong, he Love's big V8 muscle cars as much as i do its just that he has no interest in meeting up with like minded people to discuss and show what we've done to our cars. We did a RWYB at Santa Pod last year and as much as he enjoyed it he doesn't want to do it again. I however plan on going to Dyno days, Drag days and so on a lot this year. He has no problem with that, it just seems that those around us do. It seems that a female car lover cant meet up with other car lovers if they happen to be male without it being viewed as "Wrong". I have no desire to cheat on my OH i just wish to continue my hobby without it being frowned upon.
So in the opinion of the PH's am i doing something wrong? Would you mind if it were you GF/wife?

superlightr

12,920 posts

292 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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yes - you need to give him more 'comfort' nights.

Davi

17,153 posts

249 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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Wouldn't give a monkeys. My wife goes karting a fair bit which others view as odd. I'm not a kart person so don't see the point in bringing down her day!

Adenauer

18,982 posts

265 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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No you're not doing anything wrong, if he doesn't want to go that's his beer, if he doesn't mind you going then why not? If other people think it's wrong then that's their problem smile

Mattygooner

5,304 posts

233 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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Steel re-inforced Chastity belt.

Swilly

9,699 posts

303 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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If your husband is cool about it, and you dont fall behind on the cleaning, hoovering, dusting, cooking, bringing him ice cold lagers from the fridge, cleaning up the empty cans, then what has it got to do with anyone else what you do !!

funkyrobot

18,789 posts

257 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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Worst "I want a threesome" thread ever. hehe

BeerForBreakfast

1,527 posts

221 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Bonnie and Clyde said:
Ok here we go. I have a passion for going to car shows, 1/4 mile Drag strips and V8 car meets which "i guess" is totally acceptable. The only problem i have is that my OH doesn't share the same enthusiasm as i do. Dont get me wrong, he Love's big V8 muscle cars as much as i do its just that he has no interest in meeting up with like minded people to discuss and show what we've done to our cars. We did a RWYB at Santa Pod last year and as much as he enjoyed it he doesn't want to do it again. I however plan on going to Dyno days, Drag days and so on a lot this year. He has no problem with that, it just seems that those around us do. It seems that a female car lover cant meet up with other car lovers if they happen to be male without it being viewed as "Wrong". I have no desire to cheat on my OH i just wish to continue my hobby without it being frowned upon.
So in the opinion of the PH's am i doing something wrong? Would you mind if it were you GF/wife?
Would it make any difference if you were doing other more girly stuff? Like erm horse riding shows or something that he wasn't interested in.

I wouldn't mind at all. If that's what you want to do.

EmmaP

11,758 posts

268 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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I say stuff 'those around you' who think it is wrong for you to go anywhere where 'men' might be. Narrow minded, twisted fools. Society has come a long way in the last fifty or so years, allowing women to have an independent life.

I'd look at your days at the races and dyno events as a valuable opportunity to spend time away from your other half, quality 'me' time, with a chance to hang out with other like minded people. It sounds like you and your other half have a good, healthy relationship where you appreciate that you don't want to be glued to each other all the time.

shirt

25,376 posts

230 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
erm, if you and hubby don't have a problem with it, then what is the problem?

others will always talk, let them and just get on with it.

crofty1984

17,064 posts

233 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
So if I get this right:

You like doing something
Your OH isn't really into it but will tag along now and then
You may go to these events where there will be men
You don't intend to fk them

Sod the neighbours. Worst "I'm not cheating on my boyfriend (who is confident in our relationship and doesn't need to follow me round like a puppy) He seems OK with that" thread Ever.

bob1179

14,138 posts

238 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
If your bloke doesn't have any issues, go and enjoy yourself!

smile


Does that come across right? Reading it back to myself it looks like you should do as you're told, but I don't mean it that way. Honestly I don't. Can I have a ride in your 'Ro by the way? I'll be good. Promise.


Harry Flashman

21,766 posts

271 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
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Heh. Your neighbours sound like curtain twitching, 1950's dwelling, repressed, bigots.

I'd kill them all.

Bonnie and Clyde

Original Poster:

11,701 posts

221 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Swilly said:
If your husband is cool about it, and you dont fall behind on the cleaning, hoovering, dusting, cooking, bringing him ice cold lagers from the fridge, cleaning up the empty cans, then what has it got to do with anyone else what you do !!
I do make sure all of thats done before i go. I know my placesmile

Poledriver

29,576 posts

223 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Can't see the problem! I've quite a few platonic female friends who I go out with, sometimes for weekends, their OH's don't have any problem. Then again, these couples have trusting relationships!

Bonnie and Clyde

Original Poster:

11,701 posts

221 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Thanks for all of the support. I just wondered if i was expecting to much. I've had friends say to me that their OH's would never allow them to "go off" meeting up with other men. I don't seem to be able to explain that its totally innocent.
I just wondered if i was being fair to Col as i wouldn't want to make him feel bad in any way. He is always more than welcome to come with me but just chooses not to.
Anyway thanks for the advice. You Phers are as reliable as alwaysbiggrin

MrV

2,748 posts

257 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Bonnie and Clyde said:
Ok here we go. I have a passion for going to car shows, 1/4 mile Drag strips and V8 car meets which "i guess" is totally acceptable. The only problem i have is that my OH doesn't share the same enthusiasm as i do. Dont get me wrong, he Love's big V8 muscle cars as much as i do its just that he has no interest in meeting up with like minded people to discuss and show what we've done to our cars. We did a RWYB at Santa Pod last year and as much as he enjoyed it he doesn't want to do it again. I however plan on going to Dyno days, Drag days and so on a lot this year. He has no problem with that, it just seems that those around us do. It seems that a female car lover cant meet up with other car lovers if they happen to be male without it being viewed as "Wrong". I have no desire to cheat on my OH i just wish to continue my hobby without it being frowned upon.
So in the opinion of the PH's am i doing something wrong? Would you mind if it were you GF/wife?
So your OH is happy about it but your worried what the friends/neighbours think ?

Its your hobby get on and enjoy it smile


My better half has no interest cars but loves bikes and vice versa for me so we tend to do our own thing when it comes to our hobbies. I can't say it has ever been a problem for us.

Bonnie and Clyde

Original Poster:

11,701 posts

221 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
bob1179 said:
If your bloke doesn't have any issues, go and enjoy yourself!

smile


Does that come across right? Reading it back to myself it looks like you should do as you're told, but I don't mean it that way. Honestly I don't. Can I have a ride in your 'Ro by the way? I'll be good. Promise.
Do you think you could handle it? Its a bit of a beastyes

MaxAndRuby

6,792 posts

261 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
Poledriver said:
I've quite a few platonic female friends who I go out with, sometimes for weekends
You're DESPERATELY trying to shag them.

Neil_H

15,418 posts

280 months

Wednesday 4th February 2009
quotequote all
I think the answer lies in colonic irrigation. I can't be any more specific than that though, I'm afraid.