The imaginary lottery win,,,,,,,,and my other half
Discussion
So, sat quite happily in the lounge, the advert comes on, telling me all about the rollover.
"what would be the first thing you would do if you won?"
"simple, I would go out tomorrow, and buy an Aston Vanquish"
"Really?"
"yep".
"you w
ker"
"?, erm, why exactly"
"because we had to put the wedding back due to you loosing your job"
"yes. And the relevance of that is.................?"
"well, if you had your priorities right, we would get married"
"thats as maybe my dear, and indeed, it would be right near the top of my list of things to do. However........................im unlikely to be able to organize the venue, the registrar, the menu's.not to mention the guests"
"that is so typical of you to be able to find excuses"
"not excuses, just being realistic- one is attainable at a moments notice, the other requires at least a months planning. Unless of course, you want to go to Gretna Green-which wasnt what you wanted when we last discussed it, and imagine-if you will- the scale of guests, and the absolute dearm venue we could have should we ever win it"
"im not interested, im going out"
"Eh? what the f
k? You do realise that we are talking about an entirely ficticious scenario-ie i havnt won the lottery draw which hasnt actually been drawn yet"
"thats not the point, it tells me what you really think of me"
(cue doors slamming, stomping of feet up and down stairs etc)
"im really sorry, but i refuse, point blank, to argue about something that a/. hasnt happened, and b/. is unlikely ever to anyway"
"f
k off, im going out"
"right"
Now, i am by no means a genius, but can anyone here (whether equipped with a penis or not) explain what the f
k is going on inside this womans head???
I can understand the crushing blow of dissapointment of not being married the instant some imaginary cash lands, but surely someone who is intelligent (ie-her) can see the utter futility of this arguement.
Now, should i go to the pub, or not???
"what would be the first thing you would do if you won?"
"simple, I would go out tomorrow, and buy an Aston Vanquish"
"Really?"
"yep".
"you w
ker""?, erm, why exactly"
"because we had to put the wedding back due to you loosing your job"
"yes. And the relevance of that is.................?"
"well, if you had your priorities right, we would get married"
"thats as maybe my dear, and indeed, it would be right near the top of my list of things to do. However........................im unlikely to be able to organize the venue, the registrar, the menu's.not to mention the guests"
"that is so typical of you to be able to find excuses"
"not excuses, just being realistic- one is attainable at a moments notice, the other requires at least a months planning. Unless of course, you want to go to Gretna Green-which wasnt what you wanted when we last discussed it, and imagine-if you will- the scale of guests, and the absolute dearm venue we could have should we ever win it"
"im not interested, im going out"
"Eh? what the f
k? You do realise that we are talking about an entirely ficticious scenario-ie i havnt won the lottery draw which hasnt actually been drawn yet""thats not the point, it tells me what you really think of me"
(cue doors slamming, stomping of feet up and down stairs etc)
"im really sorry, but i refuse, point blank, to argue about something that a/. hasnt happened, and b/. is unlikely ever to anyway"
"f
k off, im going out""right"
Now, i am by no means a genius, but can anyone here (whether equipped with a penis or not) explain what the f
k is going on inside this womans head???I can understand the crushing blow of dissapointment of not being married the instant some imaginary cash lands, but surely someone who is intelligent (ie-her) can see the utter futility of this arguement.
Now, should i go to the pub, or not???
You absolutely MUST get a taped lottery show and buy a corresponding 'winning' ticket.
Cue lots of whooping and hollering and when you've calmed down a bit mention how you were considering what she'd said about the wedding, and how, if she likes, you can give her a lift to the f
king station in your new Aston in the morning. See how she likes them apples.
Cue lots of whooping and hollering and when you've calmed down a bit mention how you were considering what she'd said about the wedding, and how, if she likes, you can give her a lift to the f
king station in your new Aston in the morning. See how she likes them apples.trumpet600 said:
The sure fire way of having a happier life is
NEVER, NEVER, try to understand what goes on in a womans mind. It will never make any sense at all. If it was a computer, it would constantly crash due to the illogical messages being sent.
Thats true Im constantly re-booting my missus oftenNEVER, NEVER, try to understand what goes on in a womans mind. It will never make any sense at all. If it was a computer, it would constantly crash due to the illogical messages being sent.
HRG said:
Emsman said:
Now, i am by no means a genius, but can anyone here (whether equipped with a penis or not) explain what the f
k is going on inside this womans head???
She's about to be on the blob.
k is going on inside this womans head???HTH
My OH is due for the 'First Biblical Plague' and i've been getting nothing but ball-ache. She rung me up yesterday and started accusing me of losing her Satnav. Funny how it turns up in her f
king glovebox.What makes it worse is i've quit smoking as well, so things are a little tense.
To the pub!
Edited by M3CHA-MONK3Y on Friday 6th February 13:50
Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff



