Views on women going back to work post baby
Discussion
Immoral? Not sure that's really a term one would associate with going back to work post baby!
As I said on the other thread earlier, my view is that there is nothing wrong with going back to work if it's what you want to do, but that you shouldn't expect your employer to bend over backwards to accommodate nursery times / sickness / holidays / tantrums and so forth. Or demand "your rights". Personally we waited until we were in a financial position that meant my wife could choose whether or not to go back to work rather than to have to go back to make ends meet. I appreciate this is seen by many as a "luxurious" or "fortunate" position to be in but I have to say I strongly believe that one shouldn't have children if one can't afford to have them, and if that means you can't have them at all then so be it.
Living off the state is, IMHO, not the done thing.
ETA - sorry, my interchanging of the words "one" and "you" throughout that make it look like some things are aimed specifcally at the OP - they aren't.
As I said on the other thread earlier, my view is that there is nothing wrong with going back to work if it's what you want to do, but that you shouldn't expect your employer to bend over backwards to accommodate nursery times / sickness / holidays / tantrums and so forth. Or demand "your rights". Personally we waited until we were in a financial position that meant my wife could choose whether or not to go back to work rather than to have to go back to make ends meet. I appreciate this is seen by many as a "luxurious" or "fortunate" position to be in but I have to say I strongly believe that one shouldn't have children if one can't afford to have them, and if that means you can't have them at all then so be it.
Living off the state is, IMHO, not the done thing.
ETA - sorry, my interchanging of the words "one" and "you" throughout that make it look like some things are aimed specifcally at the OP - they aren't.
Edited by miniman on Tuesday 17th February 18:20
Depends on a few things....
Why should it not be the male that stays at home?
What if the women wants to go back to work for fear of going insane from doing nothing mental challenging?
What if its a case of they need to go to work to be able to be above the breadline?
At the end of the day its the couples decision, I would never force my OH to stay at home and be a house wife, it is her decision and if we need to get a nanny, etc after the initial maternity leave has been done, then so be it...
Why should it not be the male that stays at home?
What if the women wants to go back to work for fear of going insane from doing nothing mental challenging?
What if its a case of they need to go to work to be able to be above the breadline?
At the end of the day its the couples decision, I would never force my OH to stay at home and be a house wife, it is her decision and if we need to get a nanny, etc after the initial maternity leave has been done, then so be it...
miniman said:
Immoral? Not sure that's really a term one would associate with going back to work post baby!
ETA - sorry, my interchanging of the words "one" and "you" throughout that make it look like some things are aimed specifcally at the OP - they aren't.
Sorry immoral is probably the wrong term - how about 'wrong'?ETA - sorry, my interchanging of the words "one" and "you" throughout that make it look like some things are aimed specifcally at the OP - they aren't.
Edited by miniman on Tuesday 17th February 18:20
Female actually - at least I was when I last checked.
Sorry - immorral was the wrong word to use - just wanted views given other threads recently. Don't mean to cause offence - just thought a provactivce title might get debate flowing!
And I did go back to work after my son was born.
ETA Can a mod edit title to say - Views on women going back to work post baby
Sorry - immorral was the wrong word to use - just wanted views given other threads recently. Don't mean to cause offence - just thought a provactivce title might get debate flowing!
And I did go back to work after my son was born.
ETA Can a mod edit title to say - Views on women going back to work post baby
Edited by Coco H on Tuesday 17th February 19:04
What benefits?!?!
If i hadnt have returned to work there are no benefits to me AT ALL.
For what its worth i have two kids under 2.5yrs old and pretty much all my wages pay for child care bar a few pence.
Reason for going back?
1) sanity
2) I believe in nursery for kids as an early education
3) when the eldest is three years old the state pay towards nursery costs and then i get my wages back!
If i hadnt have returned to work there are no benefits to me AT ALL.
For what its worth i have two kids under 2.5yrs old and pretty much all my wages pay for child care bar a few pence.
Reason for going back?
1) sanity
2) I believe in nursery for kids as an early education
3) when the eldest is three years old the state pay towards nursery costs and then i get my wages back!
Some women don't have a choice and come from a household that is reliant on two incomes.
Personally, I think the child's interests are far better served in an ideal world by having their mother (or father, I guess, if the woman earns more in the family) at home until they reach school age.
(FWIW, and just to be clear my wife agrees too - so it's not like it's me telling her she has to stay home rather than go back to work....
)
Personally, I think the child's interests are far better served in an ideal world by having their mother (or father, I guess, if the woman earns more in the family) at home until they reach school age.
(FWIW, and just to be clear my wife agrees too - so it's not like it's me telling her she has to stay home rather than go back to work....
)Lemmonie said:
What benefits?!?!
If i hadnt have returned to work there are no benefits to me AT ALL.
For what its worth i have two kids under 2.5yrs old and pretty much all my wages pay for child care bar a few pence.
Reason for going back?
1) sanity
2) I believe in nursery for kids as an early education
3) when the eldest is three years old the state pay towards nursery costs and then i get my wages back!
Wait, you mean, you work hard, your partner works hard, you pay tax, you get fIf i hadnt have returned to work there are no benefits to me AT ALL.
For what its worth i have two kids under 2.5yrs old and pretty much all my wages pay for child care bar a few pence.
Reason for going back?
1) sanity
2) I believe in nursery for kids as an early education
3) when the eldest is three years old the state pay towards nursery costs and then i get my wages back!
k all in return? Hey, me too!Anyway, that's somewhat O/T.
el stovey said:
I wonder why some people have children and then want to put them in full time nursery or with a child minder as soon as possible.
I guess some people have no choice in the matter.
I suspect the number of people who genuinely, absolutely have no choice in the matter are very few and far between. I also wonder what would possibly make someone want to get back to work a matter of weeks or very few months after giving birth. I understand some people feel that they need to go back to work quickly, but this is where my views go a little Victorian and I say that if they need both parents to be working full time to be able to afford children, then they can't afford children. Where's my stove-pipe hat? I guess some people have no choice in the matter.
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