I nearly choked to death..... watched by slack-jawed gaupers

[Nobody You Know]

Well yesterday lunchtime I faced my own mortality and genuinely thought I was about to die..... Do I write a book? Dedicate my life to charity? Pursue my dreams? Nah I'll have some beer and post it on PH

Anyway I'm still quite shook-up and in a little disbelief about what happened, not so much the choking but the complete in-action and ignorance of everyone who stood/sat watching.

Basically I was eating my luch and some food went down the wrong way, I was trying to cough it up but everytime I tried to draw breath it made the situation worse choking me more. I could still get some breath out and cough out words like a person with no voice box.

I jumped up and coughed "I'm choking! I'm fking Choking!!!". My grandparents and sister were sat round the table just looking at me like I was mental, then somebody said "Do you want a drink?". I was still trying to draw some breath but couldn't and again managed to cough out "I'm choking, help me!" As I started trying to bang my chest. At which point my Grandad got up, I thought he was going to help me.... but no, he wandered off to the kitchen saying "I'll get you a drink".

At this point I was starting to panic big time and started trying to say "Heimlich Manouvre" but was now almost unable to make any noise I just looked round at the three people just staring at me like slack-jawed retards. I grabbed my sister (probably the strongest person there) and tried to get her to grab me and get her to do the heimlich manouvre but she just pulled away and said "have you burnt your tongue?"

Now I managed with all my breath to force out the words "NO I'M CHOKING!!!" and then couldn't inhale at all. Again I look round and see my Grandad has wandered off and everyone else just looking bemused.

At this point it seemed like 2-3 minutes since any inhilation and I was starting to go lightheaded and limbs were shaking. I just thought to myself 'if I don't do something now I'm going to choke to death right here'
with a last gasp I forced out the words "Call a fking ambulance!" I then ran to the door, I had realised that my neighbour was a football coach and must have some basic training in people choking, I needed to get next door.

Nobody had made any effort to get up or move to the phone to call an ambulance, I'm now smashing my chest with my fists and trying to get any air into my lungs.

I got to the door.... fking locked, managed to find the key while still desperately trying to breathe. I got into the porch asfixiation got the better of me and I just collapsed. As I hit the door and then floor it forced enough air out for me to gasp a breath and then cough as hard as I could and managed to get another breath in and then slowly cough the food-up and start to gasp some breaths. After 2 minutes or so I'm still lead on the porch floor covered in coughed up food, gasping, sweating, eyes watering, limbs shaking trying to recover.

At which point I hear "do you want that drink now?" I just lost it. How can people not have a fking clue that having a drink is not going to stop you choking? Food/Drink goes in the stomach, air goes in the lungs. Drinking something is not going to clear you wind pipe!!!!!!

Unbelievable, how is it that 3 people with a combined age of over 150 can not have a single clue between them what to do if someone is choking or even be able to see when someone is choking.

I'm actually worried by this, if I hadn't dislodged something when I fell down I would have fallen unconcious in the porch with nobody doing a single thing and being out in the sticks died before an ambulance turned up if one was ever even called.

And yes me and mates have had all the jokes about stuffing an orange in my mouth and having a wk.... And the fact that it would have been apt that being the biggest of the crew that dying while eating was expected.

Anyway question to the PH masses: Would you know what to do if someone was choking? And would you be confident in the people around you being able to help if you were choking? - because I'm certainly not.

Edited to add: The technical terms I have used are probably not correct, I'm no Doctor/Paramedic.

Edited by Nobody You Know on Monday 23 February 03:38

[SS HSV]

That is the problem with choking.. lack of communication. Clearly you should have sent a global text message, or email instead. This is the way of the future, none of this namby-pamby talking rubbish. Anyway, glad you got it off your chest, it's no choking matter you know

[Utterly Clueless]

I'm not sure where i read it but its impossible for somethign to go down your windpipe as there is a valve type thing that closes it when you swallow, and if something gets stuck at back of your throat it holds it closed meaning you cant breathe.

i dont know how to do the heimlich manouver so i wouldnt be of any use. however if the situation arises again and your family sit there gawpling like hill billies then thrust your chest into the corner of a work surface or some similarly shaped object as this is kind of like giving the heimlich manouver to yourself

Thom

[Nobody You Know]

SS HSV said:

That is the problem with choking.. lack of communication. Clearly you should have sent a global text message, or email instead. This is the way of the future, none of this namby-pamby talking rubbish. Anyway, glad you got it off your chest, it's no choking matter you know

I really wish I had used that line, genius.

[Nobody You Know]

Utterly Clueless said:

I'm not sure where i read it but its impossible for somethign to go down your windpipe as there is a valve type thing that closes it when you swallow, and if something gets stuck at back of your throat it holds it closed meaning you cant breathe.

Thom

Well yes this is what I mean by "went down the wrong way", i'm definately no expert but I'm sure I could work out if someone was choking.

[GKP]

Yep,it's easy to detect. The choker goes off their food and isn't keen on drinking either.

[Berserker LM]

I wouldn't know what the hell to do, or how to communicate it! Any suggestions? (Not rude ones, be sensible for once folks!)

I had a young puppy in my care once choking on food and the poor little guy went blue and had spasms. Tipped him upside-down and threw my fingers down his throat, just instinct, but it worked.

The stupid reaction with human to human is; "Are you pissed, sweetie"? FFS!

Edited by Berserker LM on Monday 23 February 03:46

[Berserker LM]

GKP said:

Yep,it's easy to detect. The choker goes off their food and isn't keen on drinking either.

Not coming to your parties then!

[Famous Graham]

Berserker LM said:

The stupid reaction with human to human is; "Are you pissed, sweetie"? FFS!

Appear to choke a lot, do you, poppet?

[Mark.H]

i had the same thing at a pizza hut, sat having a bud and a stuffed crust pizza when the cheese went down the wrong hole. Cue me turning blue and starting to panic, i tried to make myself sick and to reach down my own throat and everything, my mates thought it was hilarious as i turned from pink - white - pale blue...eventually managed to cough it back up again by coughing/fingers... gross but hilarious, god knows what would of happened if id not been able to sort myself out because they'd of certainatly waited for me to pass out till doing something (probably taking a pic on their phones!).

There's nothing quite like that panic, its like when you are a kid and you get your head stuck in something that it shouldnt be stuck in like a gate or something. PANIC!!!!

[Berserker LM]

Famous Graham said:

Berserker LM said:

The stupid reaction with human to human is; "Are you pissed, sweetie"? FFS!

Appear to choke a lot, do you, poppet?

No, HON, just get pissed and laugh too much...!

[E31Shrew]

Do your family like you?

[Tim Mosley]

Ok, Let me get this right....

You started to choke, and from the start couldnt breathe very well?

You spluttered a few words, tried to breathe, spluttered a few more. During this time your grandfather had left to the kitchen and you had grabbed your sister and tall he to do a manouvre on you? All of the time , Still un-able to breathe?


Then your remember the guy next door is a coach and knows first aid, So you run towards the door and stumble around looking for the key. Again, All of the time, struggling for breathe?

I can only imagine if you had opened the door, You would have ran out into the front lawn , being soaked by the garden sprinklers, and falling to your knees a few times before getting to your neighbours door and start to bang on it shouting 'HELP ME, IM DYING, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IM DYING'.

In the end, It turns out it was crushed glass your grandad had put in your dinner to kill you. The water he was giving you was diluted with rat poison to finish you off.


What we're trying to say here kids, Is dont do drugs.

[Puggit]

I thought the Heimlich thingy had been discredited? With our youngsters we were taught to put over the knee and bang the back (hard!)

[mike13]

The Heimlich manouver is still in use,as a paramedic i have attended three preventable deaths in the last five years through choking,one on a brussel sprout and one on steak.A lot more common than you think and can happen at any age,simple to remedy if more people knew first aid.Glad you are ok now.

[HappyGoLucky]

Puggit said:

I thought the Heimlich thingy had been discredited? With our youngsters we were taught to put over the knee and bang the back back doors (hard!)

Are you in the clergy by any chance?

[maddog993]

Utterly Clueless said:

I'm not sure where i read it but its impossible for somethign to go down your windpipe as there is a valve type thing that closes it when you swallow, and if something gets stuck at back of your throat it holds it closed meaning you cant breathe.

Thom

Unfortunately not true - the human breathing apparatus relative to our eating apparatus is one of the more anatomically flawed elements of our body due to the 'shared' nature; - the epiglottis(the valve type thing you allude to- that closes when the larynx moves upward)is far from a super-efficient mechanism and it is surprisingly easy to choke due to its inadequacies.

[fatboy b]

Hands up who thinks the OP is a drama queen.

[y2blade]

Tim Mosley said:

Ok, Let me get this right....

You started to choke, and from the start couldnt breathe very well?

You spluttered a few words, tried to breathe, spluttered a few more. During this time your grandfather had left to the kitchen and you had grabbed your sister and tall he to do a manouvre on you? All of the time , Still un-able to breathe?


Then your remember the guy next door is a coach and knows first aid, So you run towards the door and stumble around looking for the key. Again, All of the time, struggling for breathe?

I can only imagine if you had opened the door, You would have ran out into the front lawn , being soaked by the garden sprinklers, and falling to your knees a few times before getting to your neighbours door and start to bang on it shouting 'HELP ME, IM DYING, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IM DYING'.

In the end, It turns out it was crushed glass your grandad had put in your dinner to kill you. The water he was giving you was diluted with rat poison to finish you off.


What we're trying to say here kids, Is dont do drugs.

PRICELESS

[wiggy001]

What the hell were you doing trying to communicate with family at the time of the incident? You should've posted on here straight away... someone would've suggested an MX5 which, as we all know, whould have cured your choking immediately.