Accused of bullying - Disciplinary Hearing
Accused of bullying - Disciplinary Hearing
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Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Hi,

I am a long time PHer but due to the sensitivity of the subject I am posting under a pseudo login.

I'd really appreciate some help in this matter as I'm unsure of how to proceed and am concerned at the potential consequences.

As per the thread title I have been summoned to head office for a disciplinary hearing via a letter from HR. The letter cites 'informal' complaints from more than one individual about me. My line manager has been asked to speak to the individuals and neither wanted to put anything down formally or further the process, but HR have the bit between their teeth and clearly wish to pursue the matter. The language of the letter is obviously very formal and leads me to believe they may take further action anyway.

I am not a bully. I do have a direct manner and I know my management style is not to all tastes but I work in an industry that is characterised by a degree of straight talking and is certainly not for shrinking violets. None the less I am devastated at being accused of being a bully and feel really quite depressed to have received such a letter. I am a successful at what I do and I know this makes me a target for others to try and knock down but with a young family and big mortgage I fear for what damage could be done to my career.

So, to avoid a rambling post, can anyone provide any advice as to how to approach this hearing? Do I need to lawyer up? What is the best approach? What should I expect?

I feel a little overwhelmed and embarrassed at this stage so thanks for listening and thanks for any advice in advance.


m8rky

2,090 posts

188 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Do you belong to any proffesional bodies or ,dare I say it ,but a union of any sort?
If not would a colleague be able to assist you? Whatever happens do not go in to this alone and gather as much evidence and references to prove these people wrong.

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
I don't really consider any of my colleagues to be friends sadly, except my line manager, but they have said he can't attend, can they do that? I am part of a very small regional dept and as such don't really have anyone inside the organisation I can take along. I am unsure what you mean by gathering evidence? what sort of thing can I gather?

At this stage I am facing this alone and was going to attend alone.

edit: no unions of prof bodies either : (

2 sMoKiN bArReLs

32,000 posts

264 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Go in cool calm & collected. They should provide you with a written note of the exact complaint(s) before you attend.

anonymous-user

83 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
What is it you do that may be classed as bullying? The fact that more than one has accused you may mean that the the management style you use may be inapropriate!

mrmr96

13,736 posts

233 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Have you been a bully or not? Are the two complainants independent?

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
I have had the information in writing.

They state that my manner is belittling and not 'constructive criticism'.

anonymous-user

83 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Retro79 said:
I have had the information in writing.

They state that my manner is belittling and not 'constructive criticism'.
Does sound a little bit like bullying! Im not saying that you are but you need to prove that you are not

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Well, I know my manner grates on some people thats for sure. But I personally prefer people to be direct with me and as such I am direct to others. But I am never insulting or critical in a personal manner.

I am not a manager as such, but I am a senior member of staff so when the manager disappears for meetings etc it falls on me to ensure the place keeps running! I don't ask for this responsibility but would be accountable if anything were to go wrong.

I think this is part of the problem, I don't have the position of manager but am left to manage frequently. They don't see me as their manager and probably resent me telling them what to do.

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
MonkeyMatt said:
Retro79 said:
I have had the information in writing.

They state that my manner is belittling and not 'constructive criticism'.
Does sound a little bit like bullying! Im not saying that you are but you need to prove that you are not
So how does one prove one is not something? Bullying is such a wide term. I can be a prat just like anyone else, but I don't consider myself a bully.

anonymous-user

83 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Retro79 said:
Well, I know my manner grates on some people thats for sure. But I personally prefer people to be direct with me and as such I am direct to others. But I am never insulting or critical in a personal manner.

I am not a manager as such, but I am a senior member of staff so when the manager disappears for meetings etc it falls on me to ensure the place keeps running! I don't ask for this responsibility but would be accountable if anything were to go wrong.

I think this is part of the problem, I don't have the position of manager but am left to manage frequently. They don't see me as their manager and probably resent me telling them what to do.
You need to speak to your line manager and tell them you do not like being left to manage people and they should get suitable cover when they are not around.

s p a c e m a n

12,044 posts

177 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
HR letters always read in a formal way, it's the way that those people are programmed to write. How many people do you have under you, can you not narrow down the likely suspects? Personally the only thing that I would be interested in at the moment would be their motives and what the likely next steps will be, but I am a paranoid bd.

Good luck with whatever is going on thumbup

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Pretty sure I know who it is but don't see how that can help me really.

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
mrmr96 said:
Have you been a bully or not? Are the two complainants independent?
They are as independent as those on a small team of 5 can be! i.e. they socialise and lunch together etc

2 sMoKiN bArReLs

32,000 posts

264 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Reading between the lines you seem to believe there's some truth in the accusation. Some contrition is probably the order of the day.

Marcellus

7,204 posts

248 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
If they have invited you to a "disciplinary hearing" then iirc you permitted any other employee to attend with you and they cannot say who you can and who you can't ask.

If they are inviting you to some special coaching to adopt a slightly different management style then that's a different story.

Yamatrix850

290 posts

163 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
I was in a similar position with regards to disciplinary investigation about a decade ago.

At the time, I was in denial, and thought I was just 'robust and direct'.

Now...I look back and realise I was a complete and utter to work for - and that the action was completely justified.

It cost me my job, but did give me the kick I needed to sort my 'style' out.

Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
2 sMoKiN bArReLs said:
Reading between the lines you seem to believe there's some truth in the accusation. Some contrition is probably the order of the day.
I have no problem with being contrite if that is the best way forward. But the internet says never to admit a thing in these meetings and I don't wish to hang myself with my own rope if you know what I mean.

Some truth yes. There is a reason I am not the manager! But we're all adults and if I said something which someone thought was out of line I would expect them to turn around and tell me so, not organise a witch hunt.


Retro79

Original Poster:

15 posts

162 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
Marcellus said:
If they have invited you to a "disciplinary hearing" then iirc you permitted any other employee to attend with you and they cannot say who you can and who you can't ask.

If they are inviting you to some special coaching to adopt a slightly different management style then that's a different story.
Can anyone confirm if this is the case?

singlecoil

35,826 posts

275 months

Saturday 23rd March 2013
quotequote all
If it isn't their aim to fire you, then your best bet is to say something along the lines of "I realise that perhaps my manner might have been seen as being direct, and I am going to take a more thoughtful approach in future, find other ways of making my point".

No need to admit to bullying, or anything approaching that, just make the point that your style is not going to cause any problems in the future.

Everybody's happy.