Critique my CV please!
Discussion
Right guys, hoping for some help from the PH masses. Getting ready to send my CV off for a potential new job. The role is an account management position at one of the major high street banks' corporate division. The ad for the role seems to be fairly inclusive and I'm aware that I don't have much direct sales experience but I really fancy the job and would appreciate a little constructive criticism of my CV if anyone has the time 
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
Remove the curiculm Vitae bit at the top, they'll know what it is.
The skills section is likely to get the CV thrown in the NO pile before anything else gets read. Team player, good communicator, yada yada bulls
t and buzzwards, bin.
Even if they read past that, you've then got siz bulletted points under a heading of achievements, but only one of those is clearly and achievement.
eg this
Work through the whole thing on that basis and you'll have far more of a chance.
The skills section is likely to get the CV thrown in the NO pile before anything else gets read. Team player, good communicator, yada yada bulls
t and buzzwards, bin.Even if they read past that, you've then got siz bulletted points under a heading of achievements, but only one of those is clearly and achievement.
eg this
- Made responsible for a team of 5 in respect of organising workload, motivation and delegation. (BUPA)
- Improved team motivation and throughput by prioritising workload and delegation.
Work through the whole thing on that basis and you'll have far more of a chance.
tj2002 said:
What's throughout?? Agree about the skills part being a tad generic but what would I be better putting there? I thought it's important to outline your skill set early doors and if my jobs so far haven't been technical then what do I talk about?
It's throughput, not throughout.I don't know what your skillset is, however I do know that what you've listed isn't a skillset, its some woolly buzzwords.
Write in "features and benefits" ie, I used excellent people skills to motivate a department to provide 30% better performance.
That's actually telling the reader something concrete
Hi
Can you post the job spec, often helpful to see that beforehand.
Personally, I am not a fan of the format. Have a google, loads of layout examples out there.
I would put the achievements under the job they were related to and remove the (BUPA)/(CAPITA) form the whole document for a start.
Try going through the job spec for your current role and using the descriptions used to help bulk out your own document.
Can send you an example if you PM me your details.
Can you post the job spec, often helpful to see that beforehand.
Personally, I am not a fan of the format. Have a google, loads of layout examples out there.
I would put the achievements under the job they were related to and remove the (BUPA)/(CAPITA) form the whole document for a start.
Try going through the job spec for your current role and using the descriptions used to help bulk out your own document.
Can send you an example if you PM me your details.
tj2002 said:
It's a tough one that. It's a talking point I guess and although it shows that I'm a quitter I can explain why I decided that Uni wasn't for me. Is it not woth showing that I did get accepted to a Uni?
Getting accepted to uni doesn't mean a thing. It's what you achieve from university that counts, and as you haven't achieved anything from university I would remove it from your CV. Your O and A levels are adequate. It's your work experience that really counts, but just be aware that some jobs require a degree as minimum requirement !!!Personally I agree with the comments on the achievements section.
Introduced blah blah, sounds like a made up achievement TBH. As an employer I'd want to know exactly how you did this, was it to time, was it to cost, did it actually work, and what were the benefits and what specifically your role was. Were you the designer of the method / system? The implementation person? The PM? etc.
Responsible for is also a bit of a poor term. How were you responsible? What was your role? How effective were you? etc.
Employers will be looking for whether your Skills, Knowledge, and Attitudes match what they need. Your CV needs to communicate clearly how you do.
ETA I've just noticed you do go onto expand a bit in the career history section, but I never got that far, which in itself is telling.
Good luck
Introduced blah blah, sounds like a made up achievement TBH. As an employer I'd want to know exactly how you did this, was it to time, was it to cost, did it actually work, and what were the benefits and what specifically your role was. Were you the designer of the method / system? The implementation person? The PM? etc.
Responsible for is also a bit of a poor term. How were you responsible? What was your role? How effective were you? etc.
Employers will be looking for whether your Skills, Knowledge, and Attitudes match what they need. Your CV needs to communicate clearly how you do.
ETA I've just noticed you do go onto expand a bit in the career history section, but I never got that far, which in itself is telling.
Good luck
Well I took onboard the feedback you guys gave and redrafted my rather poor effort. Fired off the new one only to get an out of office reply stating that the closing date for apps was a few hours previous, despite this not being mentioned anywhere on the advert or online anywhere. It was over a week before the recruitment event and 4 days after the advert went out 
Anyways, here's the new one, looks much better in word format but google docs just for sharing, I think it's an improvement.
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
Anyways, here's the new one, looks much better in word format but google docs just for sharing, I think it's an improvement.
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
Put your references in...
Whenever I have recruited people, a big magnet to department B1-N are the words "References available on request". You're trying to be hired for a job, so therefore you make the recruitment personell's job as easy and fluid as humanly possible. If they have to go through asking you to give them reference details, you are making their jobs harder and therefore making them less likely to hire you.
Also, personal statements first thing in a CV are completely pointless and again, something that magnetised the CV to B1-N. I don't want to know how you can be relied upon to polish giraffes to a mirror finish - I want clear, concise, no-bullst information. Name, Address, DOB, e-mail/phone no, qualifications, achievements, skills and references.
The second CV was a lot better, but honestly - put your references in - If you present *all* the available information to a prospective employer, then they are more likely to offer you the interview.
Whenever I have recruited people, a big magnet to department B1-N are the words "References available on request". You're trying to be hired for a job, so therefore you make the recruitment personell's job as easy and fluid as humanly possible. If they have to go through asking you to give them reference details, you are making their jobs harder and therefore making them less likely to hire you.
Also, personal statements first thing in a CV are completely pointless and again, something that magnetised the CV to B1-N. I don't want to know how you can be relied upon to polish giraffes to a mirror finish - I want clear, concise, no-bulls
t information. Name, Address, DOB, e-mail/phone no, qualifications, achievements, skills and references.The second CV was a lot better, but honestly - put your references in - If you present *all* the available information to a prospective employer, then they are more likely to offer you the interview.
I'd replace that skills section with something saying what you want.
If you're going for a sales role (which account management is) then you need to make it clear that this is what you wish to do, rather than just a job you clicked on because the salary, company or something else looked nice.
Something like - "Having worked succesfully in blah blah blah I am keen to move into a customer facing role where my relationship building skills are put to good use."
Since it looks like your first role at Capita - Savings and Investments advisor - was basically a sales role and very directly relevant to the role you are applying for, I would make more of this.
If you're going for a sales role (which account management is) then you need to make it clear that this is what you wish to do, rather than just a job you clicked on because the salary, company or something else looked nice.
Something like - "Having worked succesfully in blah blah blah I am keen to move into a customer facing role where my relationship building skills are put to good use."
Since it looks like your first role at Capita - Savings and Investments advisor - was basically a sales role and very directly relevant to the role you are applying for, I would make more of this.
tj2002 said:
Well I took onboard the feedback you guys gave and redrafted my rather poor effort. Fired off the new one only to get an out of office reply stating that the closing date for apps was a few hours previous, despite this not being mentioned anywhere on the advert or online anywhere. It was over a week before the recruitment event and 4 days after the advert went out
Anyways, here's the new one, looks much better in word format but google docs just for sharing, I think it's an improvement.
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
Here's some personal thoughts - I hope you find them as constructive criticism. Happy to send you my CV if that helps? I'm in Oil Analystics and Trading so the content won't be relevant, but it'll show you the style of the CV.Anyways, here's the new one, looks much better in word format but google docs just for sharing, I think it's an improvement.
http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AYn97C-nq_eFZGY3...
I really dislike the format of having the bullet points right aligned but then the title of each section centred and so left floating out in the middle of nowhere. But maybe that is just because I am viewing via an internet page and it looks better printed / in pdf.
I'd personally move & expand, or remove, the "areas of expertise" - it doesn't tell me anything, just a series of words. For instance "Area of expertise - Microsoft Office" - what does that actually mean? Each person's idea of expertise could be something quite different. For instance can you create Access databases? Can you write detailed VBA code from scratch within excel???
I find the blurb written under each job a little too wordy. For instance under tele-dealing administrator you write "In this role I'm responsible for ..." - in my mind you don't need to be writing this. It's six words I'd get tired of reading when scanning through dozens or hundreds of CV's. Everything needs to be more concise and cut right to the point. Bullet point your main responsibilities, where you kicked ass, how and why and the measurable result (how much quicker the new process is, how much money you made or saved, etc.).
As above be more specific about what you achieved. So for instance you exceeded all call targets in 6 weeks - by how much? So for instance you exceeded your call target by 25% by doing x, y and z (like you did under the tele-dealing admin role).
I'd also put how long you were in each of the CAPITA roles rather than just a catch all "Sept 2008 - Present" right at the top. That then allows you to get rid of the wordy stuff again, for instance you can remove "Previously I undertook a 3 month secondment...". It's all captured there in Life Policy Claims, March 2008 - May 2008 (or whatever).
Finally I'd write your school history in same chronological order as your work history (so start latest first)
Hope that helps!
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