Latest Fad: The Martini Diet

[anonymous-user]

Only clear alcohol and olives after 6pm.

Replace olive with twist of lemon or lime every five drinks in order to stave off Scurvy.

Sounds like Win to me.

Edited by anonymous-user on Saturday 11th January 09:56

[redstu]

Sounds very healthy.
A diet I could stick to.
I'll replace the bag of walkers with an olive as well.

[anonymous-user]

The homeopathic vermouth provides herbs. The gin or vodka provide carbs. It's totally balanced (unlike me after three or four electric soups).

[citizensm1th]

I will resist diluting my alcohol with fruit based products thanks.

[johnfm]

Dry January...

[Colonial]

I'm on the Negroni diet. The orange peel is to avoid scurvy.

[anonymous-user]

A Negroni is a fine and manly drink, as any drink named after an Italian Count must be, but in the interests of not falling over I occasionally have to detune it to an Americano, like a 70s Ferrari lumbered with Californian emissions gear.

[AW111]

Gin and tonic is my health drink.
Lemon for scurvy, tonic for malaria...it's even got "tonic" in the name!
Plus you get a bigger glass to gulp from.

[anonymous-user]

FAIL: contains non alcoholic liquid.

[AW111]

Next week's forecast (in celsius) :

Monday 33
Tuesday 40
Wednesday 40
Thursday 40
Friday 35

With the amount I'm drinking, I need some dilution or my posts will get even less coherent than usual.

[anonymous-user]

If those figures go minus, try cheap Austrian wine for that added Glycol element.

[AW111]

Minus? In Melbourne?

There is no number less than zero - they are all made up by bored mathematicians.
Next you will be telling me that rain gets soft and fluffy!

[10 Pence Short]

My OH foolishly introduced me to Tanqueray 10 and now I won't get pissed for less than £50. I wish.

[eldar]

johnfm said:

Dry January...

The driest of dry Martinis, only.

[anonymous-user]

I hear that even in Ockershire, Strineland they have pointy rocky things that get white stuff on top of them when normal non upside down people are celebrating the British summer (ie: bailing out the upstairs wardrobe and suffering from trench foot); and that people can slide down the pointy things when drunk. The only solution to that is Schnapps, with or without a side of Wombat Scratchings.

[AW111]

Wombat sctratchings with schnapps - and I thought you were a British gentleman!

Wombats are a stripeless badger, and thus the only drink that goes with them is Cognac *.

You are obviously Donald Grant and ICMFP

* Or beer. Beer goes with (or instead of) anything.

[anonymous-user]

Neither British nor a gentleman!

Top tip re Beer, BTW. Cheersh.

[Colonial]

AW111 said:

Gin and tonic is my health drink.
Lemon for scurvy, tonic for malaria...it's even got "tonic" in the name!
Plus you get a bigger glass to gulp from.

A gin and tonic is a fine choice.

I prefer a Hendricks for a more refined palate.

[anonymous-user]

Stick a slice of cucumber in it for extra splendidness, but still a girl's drink, TBH.

[AW111]

Colonial said:

A gin and tonic is a fine choice.

I prefer a Hendricks for a more refined palate.

My current tipple is Tanqueray, but the bottle is at low tide, and there's cricket on tomorrow - how would you rate Hendricks in comparison?

ps I wasn't drinking tonight, but have just poured a g & t. Willpower is for the weak.