abused by my girlfriend.
Discussion
On iplayer, very shocking..
https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p0700912/abu...
''Abused By My Girlfriend tells the remarkable story of Alex Skeel, a 23-year-old man from Bedford who survived an abusive relationship with his girlfriend Jordan Worth.''
https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/6066085/jordan-worth...
https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p0700912/abu...
''Abused By My Girlfriend tells the remarkable story of Alex Skeel, a 23-year-old man from Bedford who survived an abusive relationship with his girlfriend Jordan Worth.''
https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/6066085/jordan-worth...
Edited by Thesprucegoose on Monday 18th February 19:16
king batsIt was an interesting watch this. Two things that I found interesting:
1. The family activity pushed him to get back together with her as ‘being a mother might have changed her’. Not quiet as bad as the dad who w**nked off the abuser in ‘Abducted in Plain Sight’ but still crazily naive. I don’t understand how anyone with any sense would ever suggest it would be a good thing to get back together with their abuser. But then I suspect this is a gender thing....somehow the assumption is that women can’t be abusers so they must just be ‘going through a phase’.
2. She’s clearly not really an ‘abuser’ in the classic sense. I’d say she’s a flat out psychopath. She was basically going to kill him in the end, and the complete lack of empathy and the logical way in which she admitted to throwing boiling water on him, and stabbing him with a bread knife speaks volumes. Is it not the case usually (at least in abusive husbands/boyfriends) that they’re often deeply apologetic and guilty about hitting/attacking their spouses? Half the reason that the women stay is usually because there’s the common feedback loop of ‘I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just got angry and upset, I won’t do it again’ before they abuse again. With her, she seems cool and calculating and she set about a constant attack to undermine him, separate him from his friends and family and threaten him with further violence if he didn’t comply. This is tantamount to kidnap or false imprisonment.
It’s deeply sad that she got away with it for so long. The poor chap is clearly not the most confident, and was easily prayed on by her. It almost seems like she worked him from the outset...find someone who’s already got low self esteem, is perhaps a little isolated socially and inexperienced and then off we go.
‘His’ Facebook profile is still online and is just super creepy to look at. Loads of photos of them all together looking happy, undoubtably selected by her to uphold the masquerade.
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1000128903...
Eta she’s obviously still got access to Facebook in prison and has been busy indulging in her own fantasy, and is still clearly protesting her innocence
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1110503342
1. The family activity pushed him to get back together with her as ‘being a mother might have changed her’. Not quiet as bad as the dad who w**nked off the abuser in ‘Abducted in Plain Sight’ but still crazily naive. I don’t understand how anyone with any sense would ever suggest it would be a good thing to get back together with their abuser. But then I suspect this is a gender thing....somehow the assumption is that women can’t be abusers so they must just be ‘going through a phase’.
2. She’s clearly not really an ‘abuser’ in the classic sense. I’d say she’s a flat out psychopath. She was basically going to kill him in the end, and the complete lack of empathy and the logical way in which she admitted to throwing boiling water on him, and stabbing him with a bread knife speaks volumes. Is it not the case usually (at least in abusive husbands/boyfriends) that they’re often deeply apologetic and guilty about hitting/attacking their spouses? Half the reason that the women stay is usually because there’s the common feedback loop of ‘I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just got angry and upset, I won’t do it again’ before they abuse again. With her, she seems cool and calculating and she set about a constant attack to undermine him, separate him from his friends and family and threaten him with further violence if he didn’t comply. This is tantamount to kidnap or false imprisonment.
It’s deeply sad that she got away with it for so long. The poor chap is clearly not the most confident, and was easily prayed on by her. It almost seems like she worked him from the outset...find someone who’s already got low self esteem, is perhaps a little isolated socially and inexperienced and then off we go.
‘His’ Facebook profile is still online and is just super creepy to look at. Loads of photos of them all together looking happy, undoubtably selected by her to uphold the masquerade.
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1000128903...
Eta she’s obviously still got access to Facebook in prison and has been busy indulging in her own fantasy, and is still clearly protesting her innocence
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1110503342
Edited by RacerMike on Tuesday 19th February 11:53
Reminds me of an old friend of mine..
Talking about his hot slim, blonde gf at the time, "honestly, all she wants to do is suck my dick, its a right pain in the ass, soon as i walk in the door, if we're out somewhere, while i'm driving, it's starting to really bother me..."
no, he wasn't joking either. He left her because of it.
edit to add - i still haven't been able to find her on any social media since, she's just vanished.
Talking about his hot slim, blonde gf at the time, "honestly, all she wants to do is suck my dick, its a right pain in the ass, soon as i walk in the door, if we're out somewhere, while i'm driving, it's starting to really bother me..."
no, he wasn't joking either. He left her because of it.
edit to add - i still haven't been able to find her on any social media since, she's just vanished.
PixelpeepS3 said:
Reminds me of an old friend of mine..
Talking about his hot slim, blonde gf at the time, "honestly, all she wants to do is suck my dick, its a right pain in the ass, soon as i walk in the door, if we're out somewhere, while i'm driving, it's starting to really bother me..."
no, he wasn't joking either. He left her because of it.
edit to add - i still haven't been able to find her on any social media since, she's just vanished.
I can sort of see where he coming from (sorry I'll rephrase that), I see what he means. That sort of situation is fun for a bit, then it can become a bit tedious, it does hint at a lack of depth to the relationship. Sex is great but it only really represents a fraction of your time together.Talking about his hot slim, blonde gf at the time, "honestly, all she wants to do is suck my dick, its a right pain in the ass, soon as i walk in the door, if we're out somewhere, while i'm driving, it's starting to really bother me..."
no, he wasn't joking either. He left her because of it.
edit to add - i still haven't been able to find her on any social media since, she's just vanished.
I've met quite a few psychopathic women (luckily for me not my girlfriends) and they are quite terrifying. They will often play on social attitudes towards women such as the idea that women are never the abuser or that they need protecting whilst being physically or emotionally violent to their partner.
V1nce Fox said:
I want to understand this a little better, but I'm struggling with it a bit. How do you end up in a situation where someone who is no more strong or physically capable than you is allowed to consistently cause serious physical harm to you?
Not taking the p***, genuine question.
Emotional/psychological abuse, controlling/coercive behaviour, often coupled with depression/poor mental health. Not taking the p***, genuine question.
https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/help-r...
Integroo said:
V1nce Fox said:
I want to understand this a little better, but I'm struggling with it a bit. How do you end up in a situation where someone who is no more strong or physically capable than you is allowed to consistently cause serious physical harm to you?
Not taking the p***, genuine question.
Emotional/psychological abuse, controlling/coercive behaviour, often coupled with depression/poor mental health. Not taking the p***, genuine question.
https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/help-r...
V1nce Fox said:
I want to understand this a little better, but I'm struggling with it a bit. How do you end up in a situation where someone who is no more strong or physically capable than you is allowed to consistently cause serious physical harm to you?
Not taking the p***, genuine question.
Have you ever been bullied? Home, work, school? If so, was the bully always bigger or physically stronger than you?Not taking the p***, genuine question.
RacerMike said:
Integroo said:
V1nce Fox said:
I want to understand this a little better, but I'm struggling with it a bit. How do you end up in a situation where someone who is no more strong or physically capable than you is allowed to consistently cause serious physical harm to you?
Not taking the p***, genuine question.
Emotional/psychological abuse, controlling/coercive behaviour, often coupled with depression/poor mental health. Not taking the p***, genuine question.
https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/help-r...
In the BBC article Alex said:
I could feel my body shutting down. I’d lost five stone in weight. Afterwards, doctors told me that I’d been 10 days from death because I’d been denied food for so long and my injuries were so bad
Well worth a read: https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/81a8f303-58...Cold said:
Well worth a read: https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/81a8f303-58...
The saddest bit: "We had two kids together and I just kept hoping that something would change. The children were babies, but, of course, they must have seen what was happening and, while she didn’t hurt them directly, my fear was always that if I left, she’d turn her abuse on them. So I stayed."
That interview also demonstrates how much of an absolute psychopath she was.
Fermit and Sexy Sarah said:
A great, but heart wrenching watch.
14.5 years for her, good. With the added punishment that no one will ever want to touch her for as long as she lives.
Well done to Bedfordshire Police, and especially PC Finn, for their handling of the situation.
Unfortunately only 7.5 years as the two seven year sentences were concurrent! so out in less than four :-(14.5 years for her, good. With the added punishment that no one will ever want to touch her for as long as she lives.
Well done to Bedfordshire Police, and especially PC Finn, for their handling of the situation.
Aprisa said:
Fermit and Sexy Sarah said:
A great, but heart wrenching watch.
14.5 years for her, good. With the added punishment that no one will ever want to touch her for as long as she lives.
Well done to Bedfordshire Police, and especially PC Finn, for their handling of the situation.
Unfortunately only 7.5 years as the two seven year sentences were concurrent! so out in less than four :-(14.5 years for her, good. With the added punishment that no one will ever want to touch her for as long as she lives.
Well done to Bedfordshire Police, and especially PC Finn, for their handling of the situation.
Even a decade ago no action would have been taken against the woman, stuff like this is quite common and should be included in the #metoo type movement but it would never be allowed.
Once knew a guy who was punching above well his weight but was never allowed out by his g and she kept tabs over everything he did, we used to rib him then one day he simply disappeared, hope it wasn't something similar.
Once knew a guy who was punching above well his weight but was never allowed out by his g and she kept tabs over everything he did, we used to rib him then one day he simply disappeared, hope it wasn't something similar.
untakenname said:
Even a decade ago no action would have been taken against the woman, stuff like this is quite common and should be included in the #metoo type movement but it would never be allowed.
Once knew a guy who was punching above well his weight but was never allowed out by his g and she kept tabs over everything he did, we used to rib him then one day he simply disappeared, hope it wasn't something similar.
Easy to see how it happens, particularly to people who’ve maybe only had one or two relationships in their formative years.Once knew a guy who was punching above well his weight but was never allowed out by his g and she kept tabs over everything he did, we used to rib him then one day he simply disappeared, hope it wasn't something similar.
Beautiful girl shows them attention. Beautiful girl says she loves them. Beautiful girl says it’s totally not ok for him to see his friends. Why does he need friends when he has her? Beautiful girl insists on having control over his phone to prove he’s not being unfaithful. Etc etc.
I could probably think of 4 or 5 people I know in relationships that could be classified as in some way controlling. It should be a two way street. Of course neither partner should be spending more time with friends than their significant other, but it shouldn’t be accepted that it’s ‘ok’ for either partner to ‘vet’ the others social life or friendship group.
It’s a complicated situation (let’s be honest...plenty of unfaithful men are deservedly untrusted by their partners), but I think it’s seen as socially ‘ok’ for women to control their partners in a pretty coercive manner, in the same way it used to be acceptable for men to ‘give a woman a compliment’ and ‘give them a bit of a tap on their bum’ as it’s ‘only a bit of fun’.
Fermit and Sexy Sarah said:
Oh well. At least she's going to struggle to ever get laid again, no one wants to stick their dick in crazy.
wife beaters always seem to shack up again, so think she will too. she is clearly deluded, maybe even false memories of being abused as justification for mentalness.Vanordinaire said:
Have you ever been bullied? Home, work, school? If so, was the bully always bigger or physically stronger than you?
Not to derail the thread, but yes. I've always found a way to deal with it though. I guess the guy felt compromised in his decision making process perhaps?Again, I'm really not trying to make light of this but how come he didn't leave? Earlier if needs be, while still strong enough to.
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