Discussion
Why, oh why, do I waste my time watching the first half of this programme EVERY SODDING TIME. I can only get halfway before wanting to smash the TV.
Could it be any more fomulaic?
Here's the script (for every single damn episode).
1. Choose some muppet with no sense who wants to 'improve' their house
2. Stay with them overnight for a free dinner and a chance to shag their missus
3. Take a cheque for them that's ample for the work, then ask for at least 50% more (amazingly - they then stump up the extra)
4. Kick occupants our and remove all belongings (irrespective of what needs doing - take EVERYTHING out)
5. Waste a grand on painting everything white or covering with white cloth. WHY??????
6. Draw new 'design' on wall. Design MUST include the following:
i) Remove as many supporting walls as possible ensuring steel budget triples
ii) Make it 'open plan' - don't you know that EVERYONE NEEDS open plan - yes, really
iii) Include bi-fold doors to 'open the room to the garden and make it part of the house', (I think he must have shares in the door and steel supplier)
7. Right that done - tell owners you need another 25k - but it is 'worth it'. Owners are too embarrased to say no, so get into more debt (what economical problems?)
8. Start works as follows:
i) Partly knock down partition wall making as much mess as possible with a sledgehammer, instead of removing in large sections with a bit of care.
ii) Look knackered, then hand over to builders
iii) 'Find' something wrong with house that needs remedy. Add another 5-10k to budget.
9. Take owners to some dire shop full of 'tat' to ascertain what they like. Get this hopelessly wrong, then design based on what you like anyway - sod them as they are idiots and wouldn't know a good design if it smacked them in the face
10. Finish works, taking longer than you thought. Owners are in rented accomodation but who gives a toss eh!
11. 'Reveal' works to owners. Owners look amazed (or shocked), cue tears. Everyone's a winner - repeat next week.
12. 6 months on, owners hate open plan living and put stud walls back in
...and.... breathe....
Could it be any more fomulaic?
Here's the script (for every single damn episode).
1. Choose some muppet with no sense who wants to 'improve' their house
2. Stay with them overnight for a free dinner and a chance to shag their missus
3. Take a cheque for them that's ample for the work, then ask for at least 50% more (amazingly - they then stump up the extra)
4. Kick occupants our and remove all belongings (irrespective of what needs doing - take EVERYTHING out)
5. Waste a grand on painting everything white or covering with white cloth. WHY??????
6. Draw new 'design' on wall. Design MUST include the following:
i) Remove as many supporting walls as possible ensuring steel budget triples
ii) Make it 'open plan' - don't you know that EVERYONE NEEDS open plan - yes, really
iii) Include bi-fold doors to 'open the room to the garden and make it part of the house', (I think he must have shares in the door and steel supplier)
7. Right that done - tell owners you need another 25k - but it is 'worth it'. Owners are too embarrased to say no, so get into more debt (what economical problems?)
8. Start works as follows:
i) Partly knock down partition wall making as much mess as possible with a sledgehammer, instead of removing in large sections with a bit of care.
ii) Look knackered, then hand over to builders
iii) 'Find' something wrong with house that needs remedy. Add another 5-10k to budget.
9. Take owners to some dire shop full of 'tat' to ascertain what they like. Get this hopelessly wrong, then design based on what you like anyway - sod them as they are idiots and wouldn't know a good design if it smacked them in the face
10. Finish works, taking longer than you thought. Owners are in rented accomodation but who gives a toss eh!
11. 'Reveal' works to owners. Owners look amazed (or shocked), cue tears. Everyone's a winner - repeat next week.
12. 6 months on, owners hate open plan living and put stud walls back in
...and.... breathe....
Mind , I record it and whiz through most of the dross whilst having my evening meal.what i cant get my head around, is that nearly every house is fairly well sized, so the owners cant be doing too badly, but they have absolutly no clue how to do anything, they have absolutly no ideas on where to put stuff or anything
oh and you missed out one step in the process, imediatly after spending an hour on quite an impressive drawing that you can tell takes some skill to draw free hand of your head, you have to put the sledge hammer right through the drawing, so no one has time to take it in
all the houses are just in Gorges (who even is he?) style, rather than the owners
but its the owners who annoy me most, apart from the bloke on here, he had a cerb, that makes it better
doug
oh and you missed out one step in the process, imediatly after spending an hour on quite an impressive drawing that you can tell takes some skill to draw free hand of your head, you have to put the sledge hammer right through the drawing, so no one has time to take it in
all the houses are just in Gorges (who even is he?) style, rather than the owners
but its the owners who annoy me most, apart from the bloke on here, he had a cerb, that makes it better
doug
MasterBlaster said:
The pre-review for next week shows the owners walking out in disgust. Soemthing to look forward to.
I saw that - but it looked like it was during the 'drawing plans on wall' phase. No doubt it will be smiles all round at the end.I expect that exchange to go thus:
George (qualified architect who understands 'space' then completely screws up the attic room) says "Here's what I want to do based on your needs"
Owner "I don't like it"
George "Oh, well, how about this - but it will cost an extra £XXXXX"
Owner walks off in disgust.
Gassing Station | TV, Film, Streaming & Radio | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff